Hi everyone,

I'm new to this group. I weigh over 200 pounds and every attempt seems to fail terribly. I feel so ashamed about how I've let myself go. I need to let my feelings out, so I thought I would post. You guys will know how I feel.
I'm sick of sucking my stomach in in public because I'm too self conscious. I'm tired of holding my head high because I'm insecure about my double chins. I'm tired of the comments, the looks in public, and the gasps I hear behind me.
I have to do something about it. I can't find clothes in my size, or even nice looking ones that are my size. The Plus Size section of stores look more like a Fabric Shop. I have extremely long black hair that I get a lot of complements on, but if they only knew that I keep it long because it hides my butt!!!
I'm trying to lose weight, but so far I haven't seen any results. I hope one day I will hold my head up high, not to hide my double chins...but to show the world that I did it, and I'm proud of myself!

Love & Light,

Willow

Welcome Willow. You have come to the right place to find support and encouragement. When I was reading your post, it reminded me of myself so much. Before I started losing weight, I was 286 lbs. My first mistake was to allow myself to dwell on the fact I had to lose over 100 lbs. It is a very overwhelming feeling. The first thing I suggest you do is to find the eating and exercise plan that you can live and be happy with. Keep coming here and post messages no matter if you lose, gain, stay the same, have a question, feeling frustrated, let down etc. etc. etc. Read and
reply to other posts. Feel free to email me at anytime. Good luck!!!

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You know sage it sounds like they are the ones with the problem and not you. Some people are just so down outright rude when it comes to weight issues.. BUT no one on this God created earth is perfect. Everyone has his/her own faults. Being so judgemental is one of them. I know that from personal experiences. When I was overweight people wouldn't give me the time of day much let alone men wouldn't hold a door open for me if my arms were full. Now???hah...it's a totally different story and I can't help but feel rage inside when I think about this. The hurt and anger will always be within me for like I said I was a problem to them when I was overweight and now they are a problem to me and I'm just sooooo much better than they are. Sorry for venting.

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Jo-Anne
Diettalk Moderator

Hi Willow,
Yup, we can all relate. People's attitude's really stink sometimes. I've seen people laugh and point at me, and heard some girls say "Wow! I would die before I let myself get that big!" Yes, it hurts. Yes it makes me more than mad that people judge like that. Yes, I have sucked my gut in when I'm wearing jeans that are so tight, I almost faint. However, I am learning that I do have the power to change. I CAN do it! So can you! Back in January, I was eating fast food every night. Filling up with food, and failing everyday. Feeling so powerless. Just make small changes at a time. Keep coming here. Find a diet buddy. You will lose weight. Find whatever works for you. I made a dreambook with clippings from newspapers and inspirational quotes, and wrote down my dreams. I didn't put so many beautiful models in swimsuits, just people moving, exercising, and looking strong. That's what motivated me at first. Not the outside appearance, but having more energy to just live everyday life and not let it pass me by anymore. I went out and just did things that were fun, and took pictures when I got there. I put them in my dreambook, and it really made it concrete for me that losing weight is being healthy and active. I started at 295 pounds in January, and my last weigh in was 255. I have a ways to go, but I feel different, and I know you will too. Good luck Willow. I know can do it.



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Hi Willow and welcome to diettalk. There are some wonderful people here that will totally relate to your story and how you are feeling. You've already gotten loads of good advice, but I just wanted to add that you are worth so much just the way you are. In your venture to get healthy, look inside and know that you deserve happiness no matter what numbers your scale say. Just take it a day at a time, too. That's really important for me. It helps me not to get too overwhelmed or discouraged. Marianne is right in that it just feels so good to get healthy and you'll begin feeling better when you start making healthy choices and moving a little more. If you aren't already walking, start with 10 minutes a day and add to that as you get stronger. Drink loads of water... besides being good for you, it helps you feel full. You can do this and you can do it with all of us. I hope you'll come back lots and post more, too. Let us know how you're doing... take care and good luck to you!

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Here's to healthy and happy!

Dj

HI SRWillow. I'm new here too. About 1 week now since I found this wonderful place. I have been here (at DT) at least once a day for the last week. Everyone here is so supportive and we have all been where you are now. Good for you for even thinking about starting something. I also am above 200 (started at 230 two weeks ago, and already I'm down about 7lbs.) and can totally relate to what you are saying only I am past the point of being able to suck in my stomach and it doesn't matter how high I hold my head, that chin (those chins) is still there. Keep making one change at a time, and soon you will see a difference in how you look and feel. I feel so much better after only 2 weeks I can hardly believe it. I will be your diet buddy if you want one. E-mail me anytime, I'm here almost every day. Best of luck and keep smiling (that's my motto).

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Hi Willow,
You sure have come to the right place. I'm pretty new here too but it sure is motivating. Can't say that I've lost much weight but I am feeling hopefull and that's half the battle.
I woke up got on the tredmill and then fresh fruit, cereal w/skim milk this moring and was thinking this is really healty and it made me feel really good. No donuts or other sweat junk! Now, every choice I'm making isn't that good but I'm headed in that direction.
And to those insensitive, judgemental people I say, "God didn't make any perfect people and if I was thin I'd be perfect." ;)

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