I hate after working all day to have to be running around with no relaxation. for me i am busy all the time and it is stressful.
cant do it all i learned and must say no sometimes but i guess your in a tough spot on this one.
hope it goes good for you.

have a good night :rose:

Ate okay at the banquet----skipped the meat completely and had 2 salads and seasoned green beans and some kind of cheesy hash browns(small amt) and small apple crisp with scoop of ice cream. Coffee and regular coke.

But the memories of my son running up to the platform to accept the money---it was a random drawing of 40 people out of the hundreds there getting $50.00. Phillip had asked if he could go get it should I win, and I agreed not expecting to win anything but he was so excited over the prospect. He just leaped up there and repeated what I told him clearly to everyone's amusement. Phillip was telling me on the way home how he would remember this when he is 80----was so cute. Truth is I don't care what others think over my son going to the platform but love the idea that he sees it as sharing my nomination for being a good nurse. I offered him the money and he refused my offer. I know "the date" kinda wiped him out financially. But he said no, the money was mine. He just loved the memories of going and getting it.

We left after that but only got home 1/2 hr before he needed to go to bed. Left the roast in the crockpot and it was overdone, falling off the connective tissue tender. Got it put up and the crock pot washed, leaving me only 2 dirty glasses that were in the TV room.
'
So have dinner basically fixed for supper tomorrow. Want some coffee and kinda want a wine cooler. Here I was dreading the banquet and Phillip left rambling at the mouth. I felt wealthy with the memories of his delight.

Okay it is a fuzzy wuzzy mommy moment. Know it didn't look professional but I really don't care.

Headed for bed. May settle for a glass ice water instead of that wine cooler.

Donna:wave:

PS Funny what kids remember. I like this little wave thingie---for it would embarass me for someone to do that to me. So my son remembered me saying that and when I went to get coffee he started You-Whoing me and waving in the air. When I got to the table he asked me if he looked like that little waving thing I said would embarass me. I was so shocked he even thought of it.

Won $50 at the banquet and Phillip went to the platform to get it for me, unprofessional but he was so excited and was fun to see him leap up there and say what I told him. I never expected to win so I told him if I won the random drawing then he could go get it. He said he would remember this when he was 80 ---and that statement was worth the $50.

Ate okay skipping the meat. Ate 2 salad, green beans, some kind of cheesy hash browns, and small apple crisp with scoop of ice cream.

Headed for bed.

Donna:wave:

Guess it did download but the thingie flashed a warning and said the site wasn't responding. Well, a bit of an overkill but thought I had lost the first entry----sorry.

Night,

Donna

Have a sleeping pill hangover.

Laid in bed for over an hr before getting up and taking one but really have left me lethargic and kinda melancholy. Got a bath but still can't wake up.

Skipped breakfast reading on DT, not even a drink of water yet.

Lunch

Did out that smoked turkey that has scooted back in the back of the fridge and have a sandwich. Brew some coffee and try to pull myself back into REALITY

Dinner

Roast, roasted potatoes and green beans.

Got a chocolate creme pie for the Phil.

Better scoot, didn't get to the gym but have 12 hr of running the hospital halls ahead of me.

Actually love working these 2 -12 hr shifts. I had a goal once of retiring at 55 or at least working less than I played. And at 46 I am working less than I play. Except seems I run even more.

Enjoy the weekend, probably won't be online again till Sunday night or Monday.

Donna:wave:

Have a great weekend, Donna...i have worked in a hospital...and i definitely know how the running around can get. Especially since my mom's a nurse and i've grown up with it.

Take some time for YOU, okay?

morgayne

have a great weekend Donna~~

you deserve the money and i think it was wonderful that Phillip accepted it for you.
im sure hes so proud of you and wow turning down the money you offered him. you raised a fine, young man.

and also congrats on resisting the meat. if it were me i wouldve eaten it so more power to you.

talk to you soon.

You too Donna.. have a wonderful weekend!:rose: Thanks for all your support in my journal too!:hug: it means a lot to me.

Just a quick post mostly so I can find my journal.

Engine light on X-(

Headed for the dealership to see if they can diagnose the problem

Just couldn't sleep last night. Saw 4:30 a.m. come in and then slept till 7:38 a.m. Yep, more a nap.

Kinda feels like flu light headedness.

Drank some cranberry juice. Can't face breakfast.

Donna

I hope you feel better. nothing worse than feeling sick. oh yea there is feeling sick and having to go to work......

i have to go to work now anyways but wanted to say hello and wish you a good day :)

Work stress has robbed me of sleep. I would pay for sleep, a refreshing nap. But though my eyes burn and my body aches from fatigue ----can't stay asleep. So will hunt down the prescription sleepers and try and brake the cycle.

Breakfast

a big no no----bagel and egg and cheese and bacon sandwich
4 cups of coffee

okay I know, way too much fat, cholesterol

got certified on glucometer and blood sugar was 118, which is normal

lunch

if I eat any, a salad

Dinner

pasta bake

I hate confessing to the breakfst sandwich but buy one for my son on the weekends and have only had a bite of his. But it's done so now to work on refoccussing on my food plan.

Phillip says to the gym today for he knows he overate last night when I did order pizza. He already had a big meal of roast, potatoes and corn.

So headed for the gym this afternoon.

Better scoot,

Donna

Got 7.5 miles on the bike, and some weights and finally got a nap so am no longer feeling flu-like fatigue. Son started the super for me and it was nice even though he spilled some of the sauce and with prompting cleaned it up. Love that boy.

So had pasta bake and going to fix me a salad. We eat early like 3 pm and get hungry later.

My nephew is being critiqued on his appearance at work and demonstrated how to iron a shirt and did a couple of pants for him. Just too cute. Love that kiddo too.

Simple pleasure, simple joys.

Donna

Car is in the shop getting its 30,000 mile tune up. So don't have much time before needing to get offline freeing up the phone line.

Breakfast

2 oranges
coffee
ice water

Lunch

Salad
bbq beef from leftover roast.

Dinner

Lasagne

Invited my nephew to share the lasagne----it is one of those Stoufffer's family box size. My son doesn't care for it but have had a taste for Italian of late. The pizza didn't do it---was too bland, the pasta dish yesterday was so yummy but for some reason am on this garlic and organeo kick.

Got to go get the dryer empty and put more clothes in.

Donna:wave:

Hello Donna,

i never had the stouffers lasagna but i have had the on-cor brand and its ok in a pinch when im busy but nothing beats the real thing.

of course when pressed for time as we are anything will do.

take care

Sometimes I think the hardest aspect of making a lifestyle change, aka dieting is honesty. Actually taking into account the bites here and there, the fruit drink, the cutting short the exercise routine or skipping it all together.

John posed the question why we binge? Tonight am stressed and sleep evades me as does common sense. Do you really think eating raw cookie dough is going to get the auto dealership service dept to change the differential fluid as instructed in the owner manual. Found out they inspected it but did not change it and have chew the cud on that tidbit of information off and on all day.

The pup is leaking urine and the medication the vet gave me to help resolve the problem cause her a sick tummy and she vomitted in the living room.

My duvet for the down comforter I was going to make from tapestry fabric I got off ebay weighs a ca-zeal-ion tons, so do I go with a tapestry top and a cotton back? Or make it a Knock out duvet you are unable to turn under due to the weight of it.

With not sleeping and being up since midnight, and it's 4:18 am now, not really sure where I am going with this. Can't imagine eating right now.

Breakfast

Oranges
maybe some Kashi cereal

Lunch

Smoked turkey sandwich
Salad

Dinner

lasagne for me
thinking of making my son a steak, baked potato and green beans and corn

Better scoot, for have whites in the washer and some towel in the dryer.

Donna:wave:

Hello Donna,

sorry to hear of your sleepless nights and your stress. beleive me i have stress too and about the binging stress for me does make me over eat. i know i dont get anything good from it except at the moment but it is al ifestyle change that takes time to adjust too.

hope you get some sleep and the car situation straightened out.

the insurance adjuster is coming to my job today to resolve my issue of damage with the der accident.

so were all in the same boat.

take care:rose:

Just a quick note

Breakfast

Orange
piece of toast
coffee
water

Went to the gym and did 6 miles bringing me up to 20.5 miles this week. Not much weight workout this week though did do 20 reps on each side of some abd muscle thing this morning.

Off to call Kia consumer thing.

Donna

Want to plan my food early for I know I am going out to eat at the steakhouse. Was proud that I chose smoked turkey sandwich instead of double decker hamburger. But then I did snack on some peanut butter cracker pkg. But still wasn't gross.

Breakfast

Orange
Coffee
water

Lunch

smoked turkey sandwich
maybe a salad

Dinner

Steak
roll
brocolli salad
hoping to resist the coconut creme pie and have an ice cream cone instead----but being honest I know I will have something sweet

wish I could say raw pineapple would be my dessert

Moderation is what I'm aiming for.

Went to the gym again this evening and bike another 6 miles, totalling 26 miles.

My son said I looked glassy eyed----it was the fatigue and having no sleep last night. Did nap in the afternoon and didn't have dinner ready for Phillip when he came home. He fixed himself some soup and later had that double decker. It was hard to decline but I know honesty is what is hard for me making these choices.

Making ultimate choices that will make me happy and give me quality to my life.

Took some tylenol and headed for bed now.

Hope to start my day early. The Kia auto repair guy said he would do the complete maintenance but it still feels like a fraudulent practice to tell me $250 will cover the 30K maintenance and then not do the checklist in the owner manual.

My fur ball is mad at me for leaving her on her lead when the cold front came thru and she got soaked with cold rain. I finally fell asleep on the sofa and didn't realize the weather had changed. I even had my windows down on the SUV. I felt so bad for this pup doesn't like even cool weather, let alone cold rain.

Off to bed, probably will peek in tomorrow briefly. Have lumped around all week.

Donna:wave:

Little puppy girl, Lindsey, I rarely call her her name is chewing on a toy. It is cold today and spitting snow.

I am gonna go blast some music and work on the upstairs after doing dishes and picking up the TV room.

Oddly my son never sees me as doing anything ----the toilet was clogged after getting offline last night and plunged it and then cleaned it 3 times to get the scum/crap out. Just an unsung hero---like most moms. He always has clean clothes and usually food ready when he comes thru the door. But in his eyes these are invisible tasks. The trash taken out and to the curb falls into my responsibility as does reminding him to feed the outside dog.
Okay off my:sb

Guess his comment hit a nerve since I pick up his clothes and make his life stress free. I love the statement my son made about his life and having no stress---was too rich.

Well, off here to get my day started.

Donna:wave:

Saturday

Peeking in for a brief moment

Ate a salad and crackers at work

Came home and ate small amt of lasagne and some cabbage

Headed for bed.

Feels odd with no son home with me. Miss him enormously. He's gone to my sister to spend the weekend. Just wish the fur ball could have gone too. She is so lonely without her buddy, me too.

Donna

Hello Donna,

my kids are gone too until tommorow with there dad. but i cant say i feel lonely cuz i need a break and some quiet.

i have had the worst week ever and i feel good to have a rest and some time for me.

me and hubby are renting movies later and ordering take out and gonna veg out and cuddle.

i will read some too today. i am not doing laundry or cleaning at all today. today is Sandy day and rest.

hope your doing the same.

Got the car tune up and ate chinese out ----love hot and sour soup. Best part of the meal.

Dinner

I am uncertain due to didn't thaw any food out but could make spaghetti.

Had Thanksgiving dinner with my twin sister, her family and my older sister. My youngest neice is 13 and having a difficult time adjusting to her bigger brother and sister being off to work/college and then coming home into her territory. She acted outrageously and made 2 or 3 scenes. Really was bad, but her mom and I would have reacted so differently to this lack of respect. I have a big issue about respect and later went to her room and spoke to her. Telling her we loved her and that partly her trouble was hormones and changes but even so she needed to treat her mom with respect. Her dinner was fed to the dog, after making a scene and yelling at us all how she hated this family and everyone in it. My son thinks Jamie, the 13 yr old, hates him----that's why I don't take her on vacation but do her 18 yr old sister. Phillip pals around with Sarah, the 18 yr old and her boyfriend, and Jamie is so jealous of any attention her mom gives my son, my only son and her only nephew on her side of the family. She is always annoyed at everything Phillip does at her house. Then when vacation time comes around and I need or want someone to go with Phillip I don't ask Jamie. Not to punish but because Phillip is miserable when Jamie tags along with him and Sarah and whines the whole time he says.

Oddly my sister and I see punishment differently and I never discipline my son correctly but then my son helped her pick up for Thanksgiving dinner, not hers. I don't threaten with a belt, like she does, but have a tendency to use his own shame and my lost of respect or trust to punish. He has told me he can't stand for me not to be proud of him. I have spatted him on the leg with my hand but only once used a paddle and never repeated. I had tears in my eyes from that paddle swat, it tore me apart and I was the one crying. Oddly my son wasn't mad, he said he didn't do as he was told. Never again. But I would never put up with the disrespect her daughter displayed. My son was astonished she would act this way and told me he would never treat me like that. And he wouldn't though he forgets he went thru an angry stage at 13 too.

Didn't sleep good last night.

It's the stress of family get together and the stress of getting the car 30 K maintenance done.

I really am beat. Worked 24 hr this weekend and then slept 3 hr and drove 2 hr to my sister's and ate the tensed filled meal and then drove 2 hr home. Napped an 1.5 hr and then couldn't sleep till after 4 am and had a 9 am appt at the car dealership.

So gonna lie down and nap before my main squeeze comes home from high school and demands FOOD! Love that boy.

Donna

Hello Donna,

wow you already celebrated thanksgiivng. were going to my moms on thursday for thanksgiving like we do every year.

well we all have different ways to dispiline and i never ageed with the hitting type of punishment cuz i beleive it only makes kids scared of the parents but doenst make them have respect. i ground my kids from things they like such as the phone or computer or going to bed early.

im glad you had a good time anyways and now get some rest that you need. take care.

Ate fries today think the second time this year but feel ashamed for even as I was eating them I knew it was a poor selection.

That with Chinese is a big time blew it.

Better get to bed, just confessing before going to bed.

Donna

Cooked it seemed all day and had homemade soup today---ate too much of a good thing.

Saw the movie SIGNS with Mel Gibson and it was suspenceful but my son was so excited for me to see this it was hard for him not to tell me the action before it happened.

Headed for bed. Just wanted to peek in.

Donna

Ate, man overboard! But left the goodies at the neighbors so will be okay tomorrow.

Phillip wants to go to my sister's for the weekend and really don't want him to go. I miss him but know it's boring the weekend I work. He loves the interaction with the other kids and her pets and so I really won't fuss but I miss him when he's gone the weekend.

Don't know that I'll shop tomorrow. There is a couple of bargains I would like but not so much as not to sleep tonight. Esp seeing I have to work tomorrow 12 hr. Need that sleep.

Breakfast

Coffee
maybe an orange

Lunch

Homemade soup

Dinner

Leftover green beans and chicken

If I don't shop then have to tackle some Christmas gift wrapping.

Off to bed, enjoy your weekend.

Donna

Hello Donna,

well i also indulged for the holiday too. so dont fel bad. for dessert i had a sliver of cheesecake,a sliver of pumpkin pie and a piece of blueberry pie and i do confess that it tasted wonderful too.

no guilt here.... im joking, i do feel bad but not really.

i did go shopping today. the store was like a madhouse. now its night time and sis is coming and were going to toys r' us for more.

well have a good weekend,.

Got the clothes in the washer going and deleted junk emails and now into DT in an effort to wake up. Worked and had the group of patients that were so needy and legs ached after the shift.

Oddly my neice Jamie who is 13 and a BRAT, had words with my son while at my sister's. She said to my son comparing moms, at least my mom cooks (like I don't of course) and at least my mom works ( like I don't) and my mom takes me places (like I am never with my kid). My son told her to stop this but she wouldn't let up so his response was at least my mom doesn't have to use a belt to get me to do what she asked-----gosh, they had no response. Her brother was witnessing all this mess. I really don't understand. When they had no kitchen while remodelling, I sent a roast and Italian pasta casserole to their house to give them some relief from sandwiches. I knew they were sick of take out hamburgers and sandwiches.

I really don't understand, for Jamie's comments resound of a jealousy toward my son. He is 2 yr older and really tries to ignore my neice. He feels she doesn't like him and is a BRAT, always wanting attention. And I have always treated her with love and respect. I fear she is depressed, truly clinically depressed and acting out and tantrums is her way of getting attention. Her siblings appear to have it all being grown up and having apts and cars and choosing to come home on the weekends or not (usually they come home). But my sister needs to get a grip on this poor behavior. I have taught my son not to voice his opinions of things he observes that doesn't correspond to our belief system. To treat others with respect----but this mouthy disrespect and verbal attacks would not be tolerated in my home. I really am blessed----my son may act silly sometimes, working thru his hormones but not disrespectful.

Oddly an email I was sent was Jamie's Christmas list. Like I really care right now having heard last night her trying to antagonize my son. I got her some beautiful jamies to make her feel pretty.

Breakfast

Coffee

Lunch

Not sure, have nothing fixed. Probably salad

Dinner

Not sure, may take Phillip out for supper. My house is a wreck and just feel bone weary. Could make some pasta stuff for the bud for doesn't need thawing out. I really am tired of cooking---odd for one that isn't preceived as cooking.

Need to go to the gym. Need to go to the grocery and get some basics like cottage cheese and yogurt. Bananas. Hope to bake a banana nut cake for the bud and use up the over riped bananas. So funny, I don't cook.

So we have a plan. Off to put clothes in the dryer and ponder wrapping Christmas presents. I really HATE to wrap them.

Better scoot,

Donna:wave:

Hello Donna,

well your niece does sound jealous and very competitive.
and i wouldnt even listen to her comments although im sure its hard to ignore.

I have been wrapping gifts as i buy them so its not so much at one time.
im not done buying yet so there will be more to do. some people i am getting gift certificates for anyways,

well talk to you soon.
take care.

A quick note, baked that banana nut bread/cake, and pasta stuff for supper, along with some biscuits. I know too much starch.

I know I shouldn't think of the spit spat my neice and son had, and it is more a reflection of her insecurity than the reality of my life. My son won't eat sandwiches so I cook most nights. He won't eat frozen dinners or prepared food. My friends think I'm nuts for making him eat some things. But his taste are simple and I don't like sandwich meats so I can't expect him to. Smoked turkey or very lean ham is about the only meat I'll eat on a sandwich.

Guess no one likes the idea of being judged or compared and found lacking. But taught my son to consider the source of the comment----do I really value my 13 yr neice, self absorbed, hormone raging ranting comparison. Actually it is amusing when I was told by her mom she made some scene about not being taken care of and no one cooking for her.

Got to get my butt in gear. Would like to get the TV cleaned so that the Christmas tree could be put up. I really just can't get in the SPIRIT. But know it will thrill my son to come home with the tree out to help decorate. Sorta want to work on that duvet having read Pengii journal over fabric on the walls. At least that would get the lump of cut fabric out of the hall.

Headed for bed. Really have a great kiddo.

Night,

Donna:wave:

Breakfast

coffee

Lunch

Chinese buffet

Dinner

2 biscuits

really didn't go overboard but no, wasn't great. That is why I try not to eat out much.

Wade came by after we ate and wanted to take Phillip to the mall with him to shop. So Phillip went and I am giving him 25 min more and then am going to the gym without him. Want to stop at the grocery on the way home. Need butter/margarine. Don't use it much and so didn't realize I was almost out of it till buttering the top of the biscuits. We butter the top only and try to use less butter this way.

Suppose to snow and ice in the night so am wanting to make it to the store tonight. Would like to stop at the Walgreen for some foundation on sale---and even better is I have a coupon for that brand.

Well, Phillip came home and going to get moving.

Donna

Couldn't sleep and so got up and folded the clothes in the dryer and did the supper dishes leftover from last night. Made some coffee and took the dog out. Need to plan my day but am procrastinating.

Got chicken thawed out so some type of chicken thing for supper.

Really don't cook with boneless chicken breast much.

Breakfast

Coffee for sure
maybe a bagel or oranges

Lunch

Salad
Have really a taste for Italian lately

Dinnerr

Have some bags of those create a meal using chicken, the one I have is parmacean herb -----will dig it out and find out how to fix it. Hope the son will like this.

Didn't get the tree up but spot cleaned my carpet before going out to lunch with Angie to Chinese. So going to vaccuum and dust the TV room and get ready for the tree. Would like to work on getting a pkg to send off for Christmas or it won't arrive in time. But I procastinate. And not one gift is wrapped and gave Angie's hers unwrapped. It was a 16 inch fiber optic angel in seaform green/blue dress. Will match her middle room decor.

Better go get my coffee and start my day. They say a storm is moving in and so if I'm to run, want to do it early before it hits.

Could actually work on that duvet. Now that would be amazing.

Donna:wave:

Quick note

Didn't eat yet. Went shopping and compulsively bought. I know I am a pain in my own side. I don't need a down comforter but they had a real bargain on them so have 2 out in the car. It is painful to write this seeing I can see the STUPIDNESS of these actions.

Well, guess no one was condemned for buying too many comforters. Better get busy on the meal for me and bud.

Got get out that chicken create a meal thing.

Donna

Snowed 6 inches and I don't have to go out in it till tomorrow. Would like to go to the gym but Phillip is still shovelling the snow and really hate getting wet and cold myself. I am spoiled. He will get paid for the work but he does it out of love too. When it was a light sprinkling of snow and he cleared the walk and salted it, he said I didn't have to pay him for this. Now he is shovelling and the neighborhood kids are sledding off my hill. My front yard has a 60 degree drop.

Breakfast

Coffee and 3 pieces of cauliflower dipped in ranch drsg.

Don't ask---just leftover from yesterday supper.

Lunch

With Phillip home am thinking of spaghetti

Dinner

Got pork chops thawing out for the buddy. Some potatoes and corn and more raw cauliflower sounds like the stuff supper is made of.

Ridiculously am so sleepy. Slept non stop these last couple of days. Slept yesterday early evening and then again last night good. and noww at noon am so sleepy again. Just got my dishes done up and clothes in the dryer and ready for the next load except thought I would do the pants Phillip has on shovelling once he gets in. It is so pretty and pristine outside and the pup likes licking the snow. It is her first snow ever. Have to say it was cute watching her walk on it for the first time----she doesn't like cold feet.

Gonna go start the spaghetti a cooking.

Hope to get online later and read some journals. But with Phillip home he likes to download music.

Donna

:wave:

we have snow here too. its still snowing. school was cancelled this morning so i had to call off work.
so i am trapped here for the day.
i will go out and shovel soon and un bury my car. it looks lost in the driveway.

have a nice day and take care.

Quick note

Lunch

mac and cheese, peas, coffee and diet root beer

Dishes done and more wash to dry

Snowy wet clothes thrown into the washer.

Scooting,

Donna

Note #2---a quickie

Had 2 breakfast pork chops and 1/2 cup of corn

Then later a big green salad

And now a small fun size bag of sskittles to snack on.

Trying not to binge,

Donna

It's a work day and so headed for a hot bath on a very cold day here near Louisville, and get my day started. Got beds to make and dishes to do and the bank and post office.

Breakfast

Coffee
Bagel

Lunch

Salad

Dinner

Chicken
potatoes
corn
raw cauliflower

Got to get wrapping. I keep procrastinating. It won't be so bad if I just do it.

Scooting,

Donna:wave:

Hey there Donna :)

Hows the snow? Still there and white and fluffy? I still have to wrap all my presents too...have to find a box to put the fedora i bought my brother in so i can wrap that...i wish i just had pretty boxes of all sizes and shapes to wrap things in - would make everything so much easier.

I hope work goes well today! Cross your fingers for me getting to the gym tonight!


morgayne

Tues Dec 17

The harddrive broke on my computer and so am at the library to try and clear out the emails in my server but can't seem to remember my password. Truly am pissed.

Really not much to say, miss the support here but life doesn't begin or end on cyberland. But the people here have become special to me and a source of information and inspiration.

Won't have a computer till the first of the year.

Donna

wishing and praying the best to you !!!

thanks donna


for being you... in a world of craziness


and my boys thank you lol


monty has played with that dam prple ball each day !!!!!



xoxooxoxoxoxo


hope you see what a gift you are


xo


Love and Faith


my friend


I feel both with you



:hug:


Hope you do too



:hug:


Love you



Peng


xoxoox

Only wishing all a merrry Christmas and good start to the year.

Got the stomach flu this week of Christmas and have yet to get to my sister's to celebrate. Have to work today but am off to take my best fellow to the movies.

Miss chatting.

Donna

Hello Donna,

i had the stomach flu on x-mas eve but luckily it was a 24 hr thing and was gone the next day.
hope you feel better soon too.

take care and hope your hoilday was wonderful too.

Don't know how to adjust the size of the type on this computer but it's itszy bitzy.

Will have to call the support for this is blindingly small.

Not any energy to say much but am glad to be back.

Donna

Well, my computer died and had to purchase a new one and now hope to get back to making a daily food journal. Am out of control without the help of DT.

Phillip is out of school today and can't get him off his playstation 2. Took him to the dentist and has an orthodontist appt tomorrow for lower braces and I have a nurses meeting tomorrow. May go to the park and walk the dog and feed the duck.

Will make some bbq turkey for supper.

Donna:wave:

Hello Donna and welcome back!

I wondered what happened to you and started to worry.

I have really missed talking to you.

Glad you got a new computer.

my kids didnt have school today either.

I hope you enjoyed the holidays. this will be our year to lose the weight. i can feel it.

take care and talk to you soon.

Feeling stressed over the nursing meeting where I was kinda chewed out unnecessarily. Long and short of it is I was cut short in conversation and she ranted and raved and when she was done I finished my thought. She sorta attempted to put it right but felt the stress of her initial outburst and still do. I , being me, want to eat. Have a cheese chicken faquita in the oven, don't know the calorie content----had no brkfst and no lunch yet. I really feeling stressed. I also left a note to the head nurse stating my resentment over another nurse being schedule for part of 11-7 and then rarely doing anything on 11-7 to help. Rather she stays over and charts. So she uses her 12 hr shift to complete her nine hr work.

The issue is that we are considered to have 4 nurses when in actuality only 3 are on the floor. It gets old. I refuse to worry over it but told the head nurse I needed to vent and so wrote my observation on what the nurse is doing.

So I'm venting now. Knowing I am going to eat but want it to be appropriately. Got to pick up Phil from school for him to get his lower braces in about an hr. Picked up some yogurt in case his mouth hurts too much to eat tonight.

Am grateful for nsg mtg being once a month -----don't think I could take much more fun.

Donna:wave:

Hello Donna,

sorry your feeling so frustrated and stressed out.
nursing is a hard and stressful field and i know cuz my sis is one for the hospice unit. she works in the office due to her bad back and does all the scheduling and charts and all but she goes nuts with all of it.
she works long days too.

your heart is in the right place but they need more nurses to help ease the load.

i will be thinking of you. take care and have a good evening.

:hug: Hi there Donna, I don't even know you yet but I wanted to send a hug your way because that does sound like an exasperating time at work.:( I hope you are having a nice evening now. :gflower: Just thought I'd say Hello.:wave:

Bettyboop, and Minnie thanks for the words of cheer.

Part of my compulsive personality to hang onto the stress of the morning and rehash the situation instead of intellectually seeing it as it was----head nurse out of control. Her ire isn't a reflection of my performance or even the observation I made. It is a reflection of her "buttons" and I know this intellectually.

Now intellectually I know small donuts aren't on my food plan and certainly not a favorite of mine----but gosh, ate 2 of them without a thought. My son knows I don't care for chocolate and saw me eating them and took them from me after I asked him to put them up. Just eating emotionally ----ever heard of this.

My son knows me and compulsive eatiing even food I am not fond of. His mouth is hurting him tonight and he went to bed early.

I am headed for bed.

Just want a jump on tomorrow. Haven't been productive in 2 days----just running and not getting much done. Skipped the gym today at my son's prompting----he use the excuse of mouth pain-----now think of it, what machine uses his mouth?

And my excuse was easy, he's not going then neither am I. Real smart, huh?

Anyway going to check out a few journals and get to bed.

Would like to get up early and start my day on the run.

Thanks for peeking in.

Donna

Sounds like you have a great son there :) That's awesome! Believe you me.. I didn't gain weight because I was hungry! I gained it because I was depressed, angry, Emotional.... I completely understand that issue. Too well. YOU DID GREAT though.. you stopped! You let him put the donuts up .. you only had 2.... that is control! Good job!
You know every feeling you have is valid and deserves to have an audience whether it's good/bad/ugly whatever and so you vent if you need to vent.. and pat yourself on the back. You are being smart! :hug: :up:

Bettyboop, intellectually I am working on changing a mindset----why turn to chocolate donuts to begin with----what answer do they hold. I don't even like chocolate donuts, ate only 1 all of last yr for that is how little I care for chocolate but yet being stressed and POW! I want my son's chocolate donuts.

My son has lost over 20 lb and gained 5 inches or more in height and so he really watches what he eats ----usually. Bettyboop I sure talk a better talk than I walk but oddly my son walks it. Watching his late night eating and snacks. Not ordering fries with his burgers and so on. I cook very low fat overall, esp in meat section but I self sabotage almost daily and why. Cause life doesn't give me my every whim?

I don't believe in dissecting my every eating decision---instead I come to the conclusion I need to try to separate my food plan from my emotional rollercoaster ----and to plan what I need to eat and make a committment to stick to this plan. To exercise 3-4 times a week with my coach, my son, and try to create interest not revolving around food.

Breakfast

Oranges

Lunch

Green beans
maybe salad or chicken strips

Dinner

Bbq turkey and side dishes my neighbor is making

Going to make Phillip some pasta bake with pepperoni ----it is soft and his mouth really hurt last night.

Got to get to work on laundry.

Scooting,

Donna:wave:

Ate with the elderly couple but wanting to snack and it is ridiculous. Had a nice meal and a even more pleasant conversation. My dishes are all but done and have some coffee made. Going to try to be content with evening coffee and obmit the snack I am craving.

It's snowing now and so cold. Listening to Tori Amos and trying to ignore the call to the kitchen. It's so ridiculous that I want to raid the kitchen after eating just 3 hr ago. It isn't hunger----and went to the gym and did 6.2 mile on the bike. Phil didn't want to stay for the weights saying his mouth hurt.

I'll take the excuse. Other than routine housework I have been a lump.

Better scoot,

Donna

Hello Donna,

my sons mouth hurt today too. he had to have a baby tooth pulled this morning that wasnt loose but had an abcess. not fun so i had to take him to work with me.

just hang in there. your exercsing and thats great.

the kitchen calls my name all the time.

just try to ignore it.(easier said than done)

take care and have a good night.

Gonna have to get dressed soon for am cold in nightie and drinking my ice water doesn't help. Got some coffee made but bless Monica try to drink my glass of water first but only like it iced.

Well, the pup was sick at her tummy and my son being the good owner got up at 0200 and cleaned it all up and took a shower and gave her a bath. She's acting puny and hopefully will be alright having lost her cookies. Hopefully it was something she ate.

Breakfast

oranges
water
coffee

Lunch

maybe some salad or chicken strips
or pasta sallad
or turkey sandwich---bought some smoked turkey

Dinner

Really not sure

Have leftover pasta bake for the son who has the ouchie mouth----don't know, he mentioned having some mac and cheese, peas and cauliflower.

Elizabeth called wanting Phil to go to the movies with her. Sounds like her friend Jessica has a date named Joey and Elizabeth needs one. My son hearing they are going out is more concerned over what the movie is and I realize he realliy isn't into this young gal. Actually they haven't spoke since before Christmas, which is all for the better with him not being interested in her. Sorta wish he had said no, he didn't want to go for Elizabeth is setting herself up for hurt, being out with her friend who is chummy with her fellow and her there with my son who won't be attentative toward her. Young love! What can one say.

Well, I am giving my son $20 to go out. I know he is bore on the weekends when I work but I am not footing the bill for the whole date---she asked him to go with her. She has to drive over here to pick him up----and all bets are off if the roads are bad. I really like this young woman but fear getting close to her is to put her in a position of being hurt when my son sees her as just a FRIEND. :(

Well, daylight is burning and need to get my butt in gear.

Donna

Need to get my butt in gear

Almost noon and have a half a cup coffee to account for. Slept late for working those 12 hr tonight and just got to get moving and groving.

Lunch

Salad

Dinner

Mac and cheese and peas and cauliflower

Headed for a bath and vaccuum, got to get to the bank so will have some money this weekend.

Need to pick up the TV room. So scooting, got emails answered and talked to my sister on the phone. Probably won't see much of you guys this weekend.

Will check in on Monday to read your successes.

Donna

simply a note to say after working on picking up for Elizabeth she cancelled the date----seems her friends cancelled and she made other plans.

No love lost but I was irked trying to book it when it comes to tidying up. Well the house needed it.

Off to bed

Donna

Hello Donna,

well it is good that it is cooling down with elizabeth especially your son only likes her as a friend but if she knows this then she cannot blame him if she gets hurt.

my girl had her first love and i hated him and now its over and i am glad. now she has eyes for someone else.
its funny how someone new can make the heart heal so quick when your young.

hope the pup feels well soon and take care.

We ate early and should be thinking of bed rather than food. Even green beans would be welcome, being cold.

But tomorrow is another day and I have drank 2 glasses and a cup of coffee, actually my second cup.

Tomorrow food plan:

Breakfast:

maybe oatmeal or Kashi cereal,
breakfast is the hardest for me, for I use to skip it

Lunch

Salad

have visions of pasta salad
maybe chicken strips

Dinner

want to fix veggie soup and for Phillip some hamburger helper ----I rarely fix it but he likes it,

Got ground beef thawing out and will hopefully work on keeping to this plan.

Would like to cut up the cauliflower I have and snack on it.

Go to the gym. Went to the mall instead and then came home and slept. I am serious when I said I was dead tire after the weekend shift. Phillip wanted to go to Golden Corral and so we went. Didn't eat correctly but wasn't gross. Some pasta salad, steak and chicken, 1 roll, 1 cookie, and piece of carrot cake. Some yogurt covered raisins. Looks worst when typed out. Phillip isn't big on the meat when eating out. Just so funny seeing how he eats when I cook.

Better scoot if I want to peek into DT before heading for bed.

Donna:)

hope you had a great sleep and feel wonderful today !


Have you ever been to fly ladys web site?

Darlene told me about it and it is great

they send prob 10 emails a day lol but they are all dif and helpful

it is a realistic way to help get control or organization

like doing 15 minutes of a task instead of worrying about the hours it would take..before you know it .. WALLA

www.flylady.com

it is kinda cool.. I sent it to my Sister and she just loves it too

you sign up and it is non intrusive..just helpful hints if you want them


anyhow


I hope you have a good week


we are freezing our asses off here too and driving is treacherous

I pray every day I dont get in an accident as I live on the north side and work on the south side so a long drive in that $hit

it is bizarre bad weather and roads are sheets of ice and snow

hopefully it is over soon

take care of yourself !!


:hug:


Peng

What a day.

Started out okay and turn quickly to a real mess. $175 later and wet garage, and a pile of laundry of wet clothing. Of course I didn't handle it well. I used it as an excuse not to go to the gym and to eat a burger, some cookies, and salad and cottage cheese, then some hard mint candy. But the plumber put the facet on backward----not sure how he did it. So am going to call him tomorrow and tell him. Come spring I will work on the garage for water damage to the deluge of junk out in the garage.

I have been on DT for 9 months and still don't cope any better than previously. I could see me making the excuses and knew this was bogus but clung to it. I am looking at this flylady thing. Declutter my life and decrease my stress. Gosh, as the clothes are drying in the dryer and a load waits to go in the dryer, I think of all the stuff ---all the excess I possess.

It just seems so overwhelming to downsize.

So tomorrow I hope to start anew.

Donna:wave:

Hello Donna,

sorry about your troubles and the big water mess.
i dont handle stress well either.
i have been on this site for almost 11 months and i still struggle every day to try to get healthy and fit.
its al ong journey and learning process and at least your here trying and havent quit. all we can do is try. and you never quit so your a winner no matter what.
hang in there my friend and it will fall into place for you.
take care and have great day.

Kiddo had half day of school and so got more laundry done and dishes except for 3 or so glasses----had done greasy pans and couldn't do the glasses without making new dish water so figure had plenty of glasses. But sometimes I self sabotage and leave something not quite finished so I don't get that sense of being finished or accomplished the task. How often I dust all but the one corner table and how it nags at me.

Food wise, got busy and went out to lunch at Chinese so wasn't good. Not grossly bad. But know I could have done better.

Went to the gym and did weights and bike for the first time in weeks. Can feel the forearm muscle strain from not doing them for so long. Caught the same train 3 times and was so frustrated with the situation.

Got my bud a couple of game rentals for his PS2 so probably won't be seeing him for the rest of the night. Have pork chops thawed out for supper, planning that for Phil's supper.

Took him to the orthodontist to get a sharp wire cut off. Never made it to the bank---or the grocery store, it's one of those super mega store with clothes and groceries. Bought Phillip a shirt there he really like and wanted to get him another. Just so funny, it was a Large in size and 2 yr ago I was getting a 2XL for him. He is so proud of the trimmer version of himself ----now about a 36 inch waist. I think the greatest part of the new shirt was the size and that it was made long for he is 6 ft tall. He'll be 16 in 2 months.

So may get in the car and drive over to the store for another shirt.

Talking on the way from the video store, PHillip seems to think the multi media computer thing would be more fun than the aviation training and getting his small plane pilot license. I don't know but doubt if I would ever have the money to send him to flight school. I am going to pray over it. I really don't care whichever except I want him to enjoy it. I'm so afraid that the multi media class will be geared to drawing and Phillip hated art class when little, never colored books or played with play-dough. I think he will find a freedom in flight, and a sense of acoomplishment. They talked about the kids having an opportunity to sit in on a class and I think Phillip needs to sit in on both of the programs and then decide. I am really excited for him.

Well, better get off here and call the plumber. I forgot to once Phillip made the orthodontist appt.

Donna

Why he doesn't just tell Elizabeth NO ----I don't get it. But have to go to the bank to get money for his date. Told him I would bank him $20 for this date. Told him to tell Elizabeth this too.

So to the bank, whites to laundry and dishes to do. Plan to go to subway for have a coupon for 99 cents when you pay full price for one with a medium drink. Should take care of the son 's lunch Sat and Sun. and keep him out of junk.

Headed for bed. Been a really busy day. And lots to do before working tomorrow night.

Donna

Hello Donna,

well i see your busy with cleaning.
i need to get my own butt in gear this morning before work but have little ambition right now.

glad you made it to the gym. i find after i slack on exercise when i go back to it im sore for the first few days. my arms kill from doing the weights at first.

i dont know why your son doesnt tell elizabeth no but maybe he doesnt want to hurt her feelings or maybe he enjoys just going out with her as friends.

wow he will be 16 soon. almost a man. 16 is a great age but not so for the parents. my oldest turned 13 this yr and i couldnt swallow it with so many changes for her in personality and physical too.
but we cannot stop the clock or mother nature.

i too am so bad with chinese. i go way overboard with it.
plan to have it this weekend too.

well have a great weekend and take care.

Don't know if DT is acting up or my computer. Got the dishes done and uniforms and got the linens for Phillip's bed upstairs but not on the bed. Cleaned up puppy vomit, don't know what she's eaten. Found a piece of shredded dryer sheet on the floor and wonder if she ate one. She isn't really worth the work. No love or affection from this pup and this constant cleaning up after her gets old. Not messing in the house but figure she's ate something, that has given her a sick tummy.

Headed for the bank to cash a check so Phil has his money for the date and to have some cash on hand. Think I will work extra in March, April and May. I will resent it but need a new lawn mower and don't chrg if I can help it. So off to the one bank to cash a check and the other bank to pay off my car. I transferred the balance of the car payments to a zero % credit card. Hoping to be able to have it paid off by Oct and will save me $433 in interest. Gonna try anyway.

Then to subway for those sandwiches I promised the Philllip. Been up since 6 a.m. ----just couldn't sleep so need a nap before going to work for 7p-7a.

Had a banana and 3 oranges for brkfst
and coffee.

Lunch

? No real plans as of yet.

Better get moving.

Donna

Bone weary and headed to veg out.

Elizabeth date was a WASH and hopefully she will admit it too.

Need to plan for these Sunday evenings---always tempted to overeat when tired.

Will check in tomorrow after getting some sleep.

Donna

Hi Donna,
You sure sound like you had a busy weekend. Doesn't the time seem to go by really fast when your busy. Personally I enjoy lazy laid back weekends because then they seem to last a lot longer.

That's great that you have a game plan for trying to pay off your credit card. Right now I'm not using my credit card. I'm trying to get the balance down on it. It's so easy to go into debt with those darn credit cards.

Have a great day! Katherine

Donna~ i understand the money hassle...boy do i...what with owing over 20K in school loans, my giant credit card balances, my huge insurance bill, my car payments and all the other monthly bills, my paycheck is gone before i see it...i'm trying to decide what to do so that i don't feel so overwhelmed, cause it's easy to do...

Do you ever meditate or take any time to yourself to just relax? Even as little as 30 mins can help...i know that my time at the gym really helps me with that...i don't have to be social or make decisions, i just have to move my body instinctually...makes me feel all zen ;)

Sorry i haven't been by in awhile, i've not been on diettalk as much and i got a little delinquent with my buddies...


Ready to cheer you on,

morgayne

Hello Donna

I can relate to the money situation. i do not even own a credit card for fear of myself abusing it and going into debt. i owned one years ago and maxed it out. so now i pay cash or use layway.

well take care.

Well, it's Claire birthday soon and not sure of the date so if someone knows please pm me and tell me.

Wish I could send her a mermaid cake with big boobs----and blond hair, or at least the last I heard she was blond. What a hoot, for am thinking she said she herself was rather chesty.

Veg out today. Can't get into gear. At the library with my kiddo and he is busy with some game magazine and so thought I would check DT.

Orange and diet root beer for breakfast

Pasta dish and 3 small bananas for lunch/dinner

May have yogurt later.

Need some coffee and motivation. Unlike Sandy, I am not sick, just bone tired and would better to get my butt in gear and not let the gray dreary weather color my temperment.

So better scoot.

Tomorrow am suppose to go to Angie's to watch a rental and share lunch together. She asked me to bring lunch. Wish I had
a receipe for tuna macaroni salad. Have had a taste for it and Phil doesn't like tuna.

Better scoot,

Donna

Short note

Made a mediocre tuna salad, and am thinking of taking it to my elderly neighbors to share----way too much for just me and of course Phil doesn't like it.

Got to get ready for Angie's. Really not in the mood to visit but am sure I will enjoy it once I get there. Just have had the blues----got dishes done up from making the tuna pasta salad and dinner last night. Got the laundry caught up except for my uniforms. Got to get dressed, make up and all and do my hair----have the Bozo look right this minute. It's gray and cold and have taken the pup outside twice.

Better scoot, takes longer to pull this old girl together than it use to.

Donna

Hey Donna! You need to find something you love - something that makes you happy - an activity or a hobby - and commit to spending a certain amount of time each day doing for yourself uninterrupted, because you're worth it! It could be reading, walking, scrapbooking, beading, singing, soaking in the tub - whatever it is, it should be JUST FOR YOU. Cause you sound like you're seriously lacking fun in your life, and it's way important for both your physical and your mental well-being to have some fun now and again....


FUN FUN FUN!

thinking good thoughts,

morgayne

Used that George Foreman grill to make marinated teriyaki chicken, and re-heated some of that pasta stuff for Phil's dinner. When the grill thing cools will wash it up and do the few dishes I have dirty.

Headed for the gym and store for poster board for my son's homework. I am afraid I need to go to the high school to get information about attending the vocational school. My son's counsellor sounds like a ZERO.

Probably do the dishes after getting back from the gym. Had a hamburger and cup of chili for lunch ----at Angie's request. It was okay at Angie's but just don't like using my daylight hours to watch a movie----feels like an evening hing when all my work and running is done. Felt odd but really did like the movie FRIED GREEN TOMATOES. Had never seen it before. Just the chili has my stomach kinda upset.

Well, need to run. Lots to do before I sleep. Morgayne, I am not sure what I do for fun. Angie's usually is fun but felt unable to relax. Was late getting home to fix Phil's supper. Have to go to the library for the homework too. Just I use the daylight hours to run and get stuff done----not visit. Would have felt worst had I not worked on the dishes and laundry.

Morgayne, may have to think about the fun aspect of my life. I feel obligations and responsibilites. And joy comes in small pieces of the pie---watching my son play with the rotten pup, hearing his laughter like music ring thru- out my house. Or seeing him rub his tummy and telling me he's hungry and then telling me how good his food is. I have a nice life of loving son, loving friends and neighbors. I do my part not to take any to them for granted. Or at least I try not to.

Better scoot, and try to clean that stupid machine. It really is a pain to clean.

Turned cold and the gas prices have gone up.

Donna

Best plans go BUST! Didn't make the gym---got there but gym so crowded no cardio equip available. So went on to the library and will try for tomorrow morning.

Headed for bed. Been feeling down and not sure why. The gray weather doesn't help and the un-expected plumbing bill . Not really sure if it's any of these things---maybe just need a good night sleep and a productive day tomorrow.

Headed for bed .

Check in tomorrow.

Donna:wave:

Breakfast

Oranges

Lunch

Salad

Dinner

Chicken or so I think. I really don't know absolutely

Going to try flylady.com to work on this house. Overstuffed and overflowing. I am willing to try the advise.

Better scoot.

Donna

Hello Donna,

sorry you feel down. i do alot too and i think its from havoing so much to do plus you have lack of sleep on top of it.

just do what you can and dont worry if you get everything done all the time. get some sleep too.

i care about you and hope you feel better. sometimes a good sleep really helps how your feeling/
take care and talk to you soon.

Gonna share a meal with my elderly neighbors tomorrow----broccoli salad and the mediocre tuna pasta salad I made.

Expecting snow tomorrw and feel like I never got anything done today. Washed up some rugs . Went to grocery after going to the gym, and then picked up some slacks for Phillip that he doesn't like so it's back to the store to return them. Need some bouillion cubes and pasta. May try to doll up that tuna salad.

Well, better scoot to bed. Have to say am honestly tired.

Wished I had shined my sink.

Donna

Hello Donna,

you sound like me always thinking of what chore needs to be done next.
i hope you got the rest and sleep you seem to be needing,
from the posts in your journal id say you get alot done.

dont be so hard on yourself and take some relaxing time for just you.

have a great day!

Got uniforms in the washer and took the dog out. Called my financial advisor and have an appt next Monday to look at my taxes. Folded load of clothes----but they are still on the dryer. Got to run to the store and return the slacks Phil didn't like. Head for grocery, oh and to the post office for forms for taxes.

Haven't dusted all week tho did buy some dusting spray stuff. Gosh, I am a mess.

Would like to clean the bathroom and pick up the hallway. Didn't take time for coffee this morning so grabbing my ice water and shoes and running out the door. Gonna share dinner tonight with the neighbors. Should make a dessert. Brownies are always good and simple and I am not tempted to eat.

Don't know if I can find my shoes without the caffeine----will dry the uniforms when I get back.

got to scoot.

Donna

Unreal the running of today and so settled for a hamburger and coffee for lunch and ice water was breakfast.

Suppose to have a very early dinner of broccoli salad and tuna salad----made a cranberry pineapple jello mold to go along with it. Not planning on eating more tuna ----had it for 2 days now. And just marginally like the cranberry stuff. Oh, the brownies, forgot them. Better get off her and whip some up.

Donna
:tomato:

you do have some control there !

I am not even a sweet craver...but the smell of a warm brownie...then seeing them would do me in hahhahaha

I am working on my bday so wont be any cake to over eat ! friends are taking me to dim sum on the 17th though (holiday here in alberta so our place closed) and I will have a egg bun for my cake then lol

did you find out about the aviation classes yet? that would be a thrill for anyone... phil will love it !

I sure would too lol I plan on taking the course one day just for the hell of it

I finally got my sink empty of dishes lol

i love flylady and it does make me do some things lol not not at thier pace lol


I will take one of my little sticker pictures of my yard...the snow is amazing, esp considering we had none at new years.. I will tuck that in your card... you might need glasses to see it though

pretty little pictures but i would never get around to developing real pics...shesh.. I have pics from last years ice fishing trip on that film in reg camera...then summer pics...then more winter hahahahah

the film will prob expire by the time i finish it


anyhow


checking in to see how your week went


hope you had time for you and your weekend is good!


have a good evening


:hug:


Peng

Dont even mention brownies or anything choc to me cuz that is one of my weaknesses.
i adore choc in any form.
but i cannot eat a little of it so that the problem for me.

i hope you have a relaxing weekend. it snowed here.
i am sick of it already.

school was cancelled thus i am home too today again.

take care and talk to you later.

I know this seems exaggerated but am so disappointed I could cry over his flat statement I am not going to that school. He states he doesn't want to do anything outside of the school to complete requirements for the classes. My honest feelings are WHAT A LAZY $SS! I am serious I was so upset. In the aviation class he has to go to the airport to arrange 54 hr of flight training. Gosh, how tough is that----but has to be done on his own time. The airport can't be 10 miles away from our house.

I told him of my fears his friends would be competitive instead of supportive in the multi-media class. Now I wonder if this is what made him say he isn't going.

I see this as such an opportunity missed and feel a sense of loss when he said this. I really am so disappointed and fear my stating my fears has turned him against going all together.

Headed for the gym soon and gonna use the time to talk to him about this school. I am so disappointed.

Worst is I fear it is my fault. As always have clothes in the dryer and washer and so better scoot.

Breakfast

oranges and coffee

Lunch

not sure, with the anxiety and disappoointment I really want to eat now and just had 2 oranges. I know it is a stressor to hear him withdraw his interest in going to the vocational school. I was so excited for him.

Dinner

Thinking of mac and cheese and fish and peas for the buddy/son. Definately no fish for me.

Can feel tears of disappointment in my eyes over this school thing----that is how upsetting it is. He is such an underachiever and was hoping going there would light a fire in him. He is a good student but rarely evers brings home a book----just think what he could do if he studied. But can't make him take these classes and if he hates them after I encouraged him so, he will blame me. Really that doesn't bother me as much as him missing the experience.

I never had the opportunity to do these things out of high school----and had I, I really doubt I would have gone outside my comfort zone. I guess I don't want to live life thru my son but don't want to have him limit life thru his fears like I feel I have mine.

Claire talks of venturing oceans but being unable to unless you lose sight of the shore. Losing the fat, and then having to experience life rather than eat over it. Or going to school and trying something new without guarantees it will be what you want.

Gotta scoot,

Donna
:(

Hello Donna,
kids change there minds left and right and sometimes we dont like there decisions but as long as it wont hurt them then we should respect it. i try to give my kids respect for there decisions unless there decisoion will hurt them.

as for Phillip i think hes making a mistake too, the school is a good chance to learn something new.

hope your talk with him helps him out.
your a great mom Donna dont be so tough on yourself.

and enjoy your sunday.

Been running the last couple of days trying to get taxes done and some bills paid and just am not finding time to get online.

Claire, no shine on my sink but at least I did all the dishes and it's empty.

Food isn't good and isn't bad. But feeling stressed. Gonna go to the library to get help with my taxes and save me the CPA money or so I hope. It is just about the same money as the plumber and he still hasn't come out and fixed or righted the handles he put on backward.

It nevers end. Planning baking chicken tomorrow and having it for me and Phil on Wed. Then taking the broth and leftover chicken to make chicken and noodles to share with the elderly couple down the street. If she makes green beans and mashed potatoes, we have a meal. Funny but that is the kind of meal my mom would have fixed. But the chicken is boneless, skinless chicken thighs so should be pretty healthy.

Got lots of fruit in the house so breakfast will probably be oranges again. And coffee.

Lunch

Just not sure.

Want to keep away from eating out.

Well off to bed. Got lots to do tomorrow. Need to call 2 banks, and to go to the library at 1 pm for the taxes and bake the chicken and wash some clothes. Go to the gym again, did 9.1 miles today and some weights. Oddly I still hate this gym thing. Been at it for 2 years.

Just do it, or so says NIKE.

Better scoot,

Donna

got up and got the load of clothes in the washer and the chicken in the oven and did the cereal bowl up so that my sink is still empty except one knife I cut oniion with----lick and promise mopped my utility room where the washer and dryer are and the small hall by the back door.

Got a cup of cold coffee here I'm sipping on ----plan to make a pot soon

I typed out these tasks for often I give myself no credit for getting some things done around here----have so much to do and at the days end it seems I have made little inroads

So I try sometimes to see where my time went. Took the pup out twice since she couldn't seem to do her business the first time. Got the newspaper and it sits with the other 2 from Mon and Tues not opened. I don't normally get the daily paper but they had a special for 1/2 off and so getting it daily cost less than weekends. I don't make the time to read it.

Headed for a bath and maybe color my hair. Have dark brown hair naturally and keep it that color just hiding the gray.

Claire, I'll be 47 on my birthday heading for that 50 mark. I know I don't look my age but with arthritis in my foot and pelvis, and decrepitus in my left knee( where you hear it clicking when you climb stairs) I feel those years. I just fear if I don't get some weight off I will be feeling them alot more.

Well, have lots to do so better start cracking for daylight is wasting. Wish I had gotten up when the alarm went off at 7 am but for some reason I fall into a deep sleep after Phil goes to school almost every day. Maybe from all those years working nights and sleeping deeply early morning.

Gotta scoot,

Donna

:D LOOKS LIKE YOU ARE REALLY GETTING THINGS DONE OVER THERE!!!!! THAT'S A GOOD FEELING EH? YAY!!!!!:lift:

KEEP ON TRUCKIN!!:water:

Bettyboop, thanks for peeking in but still don't have the taxes done. Geeze, a 3 hr wait to have some guy scratch out my efforts and scribble over it and tell me to re-copy it onto another form and mail. I was appalled at his attitude, not that of a giving volunteer. His whole attitude stunk! I wonder why he does it.

Went to the gym and did cardio only and went to the discount store and got a rug and my nephew a pillow. Anyway, have almost no money so if child support doesn't come in will have to go to the bank to get some cash.

Want to get my hair cut before the weekend for my bangs won't stay out of my eyes. But the house need a real cleaning of mopping and dusting and vacuuming. Got the dishes done and made a chocolate cake for the dinner tomorrow. In case you don't know me, I don't care for chocolate so usually make chocolate desserts so not to be tempted.

Got ground beef thawing and may make pea casserole so Phil has good food over the weekend.

Got home and made that cake and did up those dishes again. So my sink isn't shiny but at least empty.

Drinking cold coffee again. Too tired to make another pot and cold coffee is better than the other options.

So headed to bed and will try to get up early and get a chore or two done before going to get my hair cut.

The barber I use----is a talker and babbles on and on over conspiracies he feels the government has been involved in. I tune him out and keep saying "un hun, oh you don't say" etc.
He gives a great cut but his rattling on and on over government plots and such gets old.

I better head for bed so can start my day. Heating bill was horrible this last month---but gas has gone up 15 cents in one day. Turned the heat down slightly and if need be will put down comforters in all the rooms we spend time in. Over $100 more to heat my house last month than the month before.

Well, am off.

Donna

What do you know some hot coffee but have lost alot of time onlline at DT so being brief

Had some cereal (cheerios) for breakfast and coffee.

Plan to have salad if at home but may buy one of those McDonald flatbread chicken sandwich hold any special sauce. Never had one and kinda been wanting one.

Crazy but with all the advertisement for honey bbq wings for KFC, I have been longing to try them. Look so yummy ummy on TV and keep telling myself not good for you. Don't know when I last ate the skin on a piece of chicken and you know the breading and skin of that thing has to be loaded with fats and carbs. But really would like to try them----for what, to find I like them and have one more thing to avoid. What craziness----these cravings for food esp advertised treats.

Suppose to have an early meal at the elderly couples house. Chicken and noodles made with a chocolate cake. Can't remember when I last made a chocolate cake but my son test tasted last night and said it was real good. No, didn't even taste the batter but the icing was a different matter. But won't have any so guess I am okay with it.

So dinner will be chicken and noodles, mashed potatoes and grean beans, and in all likelihood salad.

Got clothes in the dryer---did uniforms

Gonna clean the hallway and mop

Gonna go get the comforter and wash it

Gonna clean the bathroom and do a load of rugs

Gonna made pea casserole for the Phil meals over the weekend

Gonna get my hair cut if possible

and if lucky dust my bedroom.

Better scoot before it's 2:30 pm and have to start getting ready for an early meal----seems her boys have tasks they have to do after school and if we were to share a meal, we had to eat right after they got home. They get home at 3pm. Told her not to worry that I would send her down the food and she could eat it whenever----chicken and noodles makes too much for just me and my son. And this was her idea to eat early----which is fine for me for Phil eats this early every day when he gets home from school. It's just she never does, her meals are more like 6 or 7 pm.

Well, off like a dirty shirt.

Donna:wave:

Busy day as always, Donna! Have a great meal...though i must admit...3 pm for dinner seems awful early to me...then again, i don't usually eat dinner until 8 when i get home from the gym, so who am i to be talking about weird? ;)

Hope you get a good haircut without too much babbling :)


morgayne

Hello Donna,

sorry i havent gotten back to you on the crockpot recipes but been busy. for the record i am not a crock pot pro but have used it on and off for years.

first of all you can make anything you want in it and dont be afraid to experiment but i have one for meatloaf done in it and its good.

mix in a bowl your regular meat(ground hamburger)
mix with it ketchup,eggs(usually1),and old fashioned oats(1.2 cups) shape into loaf and top with ketchup and cook on low all day. i dont add water or anything to this one.

its hard for me to give exact measuremnts in some recipes as i just know what to add on my own. just use your own judgement.

i have cooked meatballs in sauce in the cooker, chicken with potatoes and carrots, sloppy joes,chili,roast.
sometimes i make beef barbeques from the roast. i cook the roast all day(add some water but not alot) and then it gets so tender it breaks apart. i add bbq sauce and heat some more and serve on buns.

well hope some of this helped or gave you a few ideas.

take care.

Got my" to do" list , done except didn't make it into my bedroom to dust. I have to wade in there and really need the flylady help to de-clutter the stuff.

But that will have to be another weekend. Tomorrow the list of to do's consist of taxes, taxes, taxes. Dishes and if time permits vacuuming. I know it doesn't sound like undoable but this tax thing really makes me cringe---I keep moving the papers but never just do it.

Only have a half day at school tomorrow and so Phil wants to go to the gym. Last time we did this my legs ached from biking and then running the halls for 12 hr. Will take him but don't know if I'm going to do anything but the cardio. Definately not 9 miles before going to work.

Got my hair cut by Mr Motor-mouth, and went to the bank and to the park to feed the duckies and Phil walked that silly pup in the cold around the lake at the park.

Came home and made the pea casserole and dried the rugs. I don't know how you contain my excitement. But at least this weary is deserved and not the reflection of depression.

Taxes, I just have this dread. I just don't want to mess with them but don't feel like paying out a couple hundred to have them done. Last year cost me $189 at the CPA for mine and Phil's and his was just some college fund. Geeze.

OK so it's taxes tomorrow.

Right now it's bed.

Donna

Hello Donna,

i hear you on the taxes cuz we paid a good chunk to have ours done.
there such a rip off for money we earned anyways.

seems like you got alot done including some bonding time with Phillip.

sorry you dont like meatloaf but i didnt know that.
will try to find more recipes for you. if you can tell me foods you do like that may help more.

hope you and Phillip have a super V day.
\my kids have 1/2 day of school too.

take care.

Minnie

It isn't I don't like meatloaf but when I try cooking it, it turns out like dog food. I just don't have what it takes.

Got the taxes done and posted and feel relieved. Still have some dirty dishes to do. Celebrated Phil's good report card at O'Charley. I had soup and salad but Phil had salad, hamburger fries, and ice cream sundae. Told each other Happy Valentine Day and am feeling wealthy and warm with love from my kiddo.

Anyway, better go do those dishes and try for a nap before going to work tonight .

As always on the run.

Donna

Hello Donna,

glad you had a nice dinner with your son. and you made great chocies for your dinner. more power to you my friend.
very hard to do sometimes especially when someone next o us is eating something we like or want.

keep strong and enjoy the rest of the weekend.

Early Monday morning blues

should be in bed but had a talk with my son and maybe its pms but got the blues

we had an ice storm and I drove home at 25 mg /hr and stayed indoors once I got home

told Phil not to answer the phone when it rang but he did and when he heard it was the hospital, he lied and said I wasn't home

I didn't ask him to lie but he knew I had told him not to answer the phone and let the answering machine just take the msg

so am headed to bed feeling my son is growing apart from me and it is to be expected ----he's such a good kiddo and shovelled my walk and clean off my car of ice---acts of love

pms and when we had our talk that is what he asked me ----is this just a part of pms---and it seemed to minimize the feelings I had of hurt, like I don't matter. Geeze---need to get thru the change or get the lousy thing out if I get to feeling this low

So off to bed, kinda feeling isolated. If I wasn't so tired would soak in a hot tub and let Calgon take me away

Donna

Breakfast

oranges and coffee

Lunch

salad

Dinner

pea casserole and green beans
cottage cheese

Snack was mini 3 Musketeers bars and 3 york mint patties, yes, a bad choice

Ice in but my nephew got home from his mom safely.

Kinda vegged out today. Bad cramps and so felt okay about napping today---rarely do.

Scooting,

Donna

Those PMS blues hit all of us and even the candy cravings too.

hope you feel better today.

I dont think your son is growing away from you Donna, they just get more independent as they are suppose too.
He will always be close to you cuz your such a loving mom to him.

have a good day.

Breakfast

oranges
coffee

Lunch

McD flatbread

Dinner

Not sure, have ground beef thawed out

Gotta scoot, going to try to get out to the gym. Have cabin fever.

Donna

Hello Donna,

i had the mc donald flatbread before but i wasnt crazy over it.

so what are you making with ground beef?
meatloaf maybe?????

i made spaghetti and meatballs tonight and biscuits for dinner.

with ground beef you could also make sloppy joes,chili,tacos
there fast and easy things too which my family likes. or goulash.(the elbow macoroni withsauce and peppers and onions.

have a great nite.

So you guys all talk about this McDonald's flatbread sandwich, but we don't have those here - what is it?

Sheesh, i hope the snow starts to clear out soon for you over on the right coast, the stories i'm hearing are just getting ridiculous! Though plenty of my friends over there are happy to be away from work for a bit *shrug* i need to get paid, personally.

How about taco salad with the ground beef, Donna? Add some kidney beans, spice it up with taco seasoning, put it on a bed of veggies...and then you use a thousand island-like dressing (diluted with salsa)...you can sprinkle a bit of cheese and use some tortilla chips... YUMMY.....

Treat yourself well...and take that hot bath :)


morgayne

Minnie

Wish my son was so easy to please. He doesn't like anything spicy, no tacos or bbq or sloppy joes----no kidding. I am not sure what to do with the ground beef---actually ground sirloin. When they had sirloin roast on sale for $1.29 a lb---bought one and had it ground and put in 2 lb pkgs.

So have grd sirloin cheaper than grd beef. But what to fix.

I didn't cake for that flatbread thing either but oddly Phil thought it was okay. He ate the free one and a Big Mac. Later had another Big Mac as part of his supper. Biked 6.1 miles and stopped at grocery for some grapes.

Ate one piece of Phil's Valentine chocolate that was hazelnut and very yummy----about 70 calories per piece.

My nephew came over and chatted but left shortly.

Suppose to go tomorrow with him and Phil to see Harry Potter show#2. Yep, I can't remember it's name.

Better scoot,

Donna

Can't sleep---doesn't happen often on nights I don't work but here it is. Took a sleeper and am browsing until the pill kicks in and sleep takes over.

Will be mad tomorrow if I lose my day but it's going on 2:30 am and still no sleep.

Me and Barbra Streisand are croning into the night. Soft music that soothes the soul.

Gonna scoot,

Donna

Hello Donna,

hope you got some zzz's I-)

when i was a nurses aide i used to work 3rd shift and be up all night and try to sleep during the day. it was hard too and i was so tired all the time. my kids were really small and i couldnt really sleep alot during the day cuz i had to watch them. my body never adjusted to that schedule and im glad i no longer work it.
i am fortunate not to have too anymore. i used to be so tired i would cry.
i would also take caffeine pills to stay awake and drink Jolt soda.
but after awhile i was getting heart palpatations from it and stopped using it,.
i hope you get the rest you need.

take care my friend. (your body needs sleep and rest)

Took a sleeper and went to bed early and so slept the sleep of the well deserved.

Had a great night with my nephew and son at Harry Potter new movie. Wade, my nephew bought the supper----pizza at Gatti's ----I had 2 cheese sticks and salad with fat free drsg. Then the movie which was really fun with the guys. The seat I had was broke and mid movie I moved to a row ahead of them. My nephew pretended to be a spider and startled me with his hand on my shoulder . My son thought it so cool. Guess it's one of those you got to be there to appreciate it . But was fun.

Got home in time to see the worst singers on American idol try out. My son thought it was so funny and was dancing in the TV room. Just too cute. An evening full of love and laughter.

Got laundry in the washer and need to re-fluff the dryer load of uniforms. Did the dishes ----well, almost. Know there are alot of containers in my son's room.

Still got that hamburger to mess with today. Have to or won't be any good.
It was frozen solid so not worried about it.

Breakfast

hot coffee
oranges maybe

Lunch

got a bag of salad stuff
maybe chicken strips

Dinner

Not sure

Have a taste for sloppy joes but know if I fix these they are just for me ----Phil won't eat them, nothing spicy

Just don't know. I know most people do lots with ground beef but Phil likes so little.

Well, better get off here and browse DT and my newspaper before I get my day going.

Got to go to the grocery store for some ingredients if going to fix sloppy joes. Gonna use a friends receipe. I am serious about not fixing meatballs before and needing serious help when it comes to crockpot cooking.

Cooked for 30 years with a cast aluminum bean pot, which is blackened inside from use. Some called it seasoned; I call it well used. Couldn't cook without it.

Better scoot, washer stopped.

Donna

Hello Donna,

well for me how i make meatballs is i mix together ground beef,breadcrumbs,eggs,seasonings,grated cheese then from meatballs to the size you prefer. i usually make mine medium.
then in hot light oiled skillet i brown them well and then add them on simmer to my sauce. or you can mix the meatballs up and add them to your crockpot in sauce on low all day and have meatball subs or boil pasta for it later.

my mom makes the best meatballs i eve had. they melt in your mouth. i cannot resist them.

so i dont make them too often.

well gotta go for now. have a great day.

P.S. about my sons doctor visit i have list ready to discuss with doctor and where i go they take there time to solve the problem so it shouldnt be too bad but if i have to go somewhere else down the road then i will.
ill let you know how it goes.

Headed for bed soon.

Went to the gym with my son and did weights and bike, but no exercise ball.

Fixed soup for supper.

Letting it cool before putting it up.

Donna

Back to work today so slept late. Always around 3:30 a.m. I get so tired but then have been there 9 hr by then.

Have a glass of ice water ---bless Monica and trying to wake up. It is so grey and glooming and raining steadily. I just don't care how much it rains so long as Sunday is beautiful. I keep watching the forecast. I want this to be a memory of him going up in a small engine plane not a nightmare.

My left leg calf muscle is sore from leg pushes thing at the gym. My son put on 140 lb and I did either 40 or 50 of those extensions with this weight. I usually only put on 90 lb. Hence the sore calf muscle.

Silly pup walking around in the rain and won't squat and do her business. Wish you could just squeeze her and it worked that way. Haven taken a bath it doesn't matter that I'm getting wet, but being cold is another issue.

Gonna browse DT and get my afternoon going.

Donna

That was too cute... lol:D I dunno how much good it would do but I'm sure she'd like it.. lol heheh sorry to hear about the soreness.. but at least you know the excercise is working! Gives you a reason to soak longer or take a nice hot shower eh?

Hope the weather clears up for you and you have a nice day soon. Well take care. :wn

Headed for the gym and so will look in later to DT.

Had some spaghetti and one biscuit for supper. Had a yogurt for lunch sorta.

Donna

Days off are almost over for you... man the week goes fast huh

did phil go flying on sunday or is it this sunday?

I hope you have a great thursday.. I am off to work... cant retire on my $ 1.69 tax refund hahahha

have you ever looked at www.recipesource.com ? It is a great website for food ideas.... from simple home food...to something different
I like that site for getting ideas


anyhow...


have a great day


:hug:


Peng

The month like my week has gone by fast and no real change has emerged. I don't where my week goes or my good resolutions to stay with my food plan. I am beginnning to feel hopeless over this control issue or is it my compulsion issues. I don't buy outrageously cause I don't go to the store or browse ebay. I don't eat outrageously until evening. Probably because I am not hungry after late night eating the day before and have too much to do to take the time to eat. It is only as my night winds down that I am wanting to occupy my time with food.

Breakfast

was missed---slept in late

Snack

oranges

Lunch

Have some salad that needs to be eaten

Supper

I haven't planned out yet. Would like to grill Phillip some steak, fix a baked potato and green beans

Really need to do this the night before, for I usually know what is in the freezer and it clears my morning for more productive stuff.

Phillip went on his first flying lesson last Sunday---it's called a discovery flight and came off the plane excited and beaming but really didn't say much. I didn't know what to think when he acted like that but told him if he wanted to go to the aviation thing he needed to sign up this week. I told him it was ok if he still was thinking of the graphic thing on computer. He came home Tues teasing me about not signing up when he had decided to take the aviation class. He says I have to drive him daily to Prosser , the vocational school so he can take the bus to Shawnee High where the aviation is taught. I guess I can say good bye to sleeping in late. But Phil should get his license this summer some time---no in Sept. He has to be 16 and 6 months to obtain them. :(

Oddly he will have a small engine plane pilot license not long after getting his driver's license. I told him if he obtained a pilot's license I would let him take me up and fly. There is more to obtaining the pilot license than going thru the school and flight lessons and am afraid he won't complete the process without some incentitive. God help me.:tomato:

Gonna go get some coffee and newspaper. Taste tested the sloppy joes I made so much last night I am not hungry today---this morning. I never made them before and was using my friend's Angie's receipe and think they turned out. Kinda sick of them by the time they simmered down to the right consistency.

Claire, never used the site you are talking of. But will put it under my favorites and look at it later. Seems I am always running out of time. Oddly I dreamed of being at your house. You were making something I need the receipe and oddly you made it and had this rambling tho rather rundown house----will lots of bedrooms and my whole family was there, neices and sister and brother in law. Maybe it was a nightmare but I was intent on some receipe of yours made with some thin sheet like ingredient made of some kind of nut. There was something special ----like healing in this ingredient. Crazy for I saw the end product and it looked like a glazed blackberry. But most of the dream was me trying to get this receipe down and me looking to you for the answer.

The answers to most things are within ourselves I realize.

Need that coffee, finished my 30 oz of ice water and really cold now.

Donna:wave:

Hello Donna,

i know you said you missed my smile in your journal so here it is just for you :) :)

good job getting to the gym and drinking all your water.
dont feel hopless. i feel that way alot but nothing is ever hopeless and yes the answers are within ourselves if we search deep enough.

i hope everything works out for Phil with his flying and all.

well i Pm'd you and thanks for all the support too.
i need it.

your a good friend.

Feb 28th the end of the month

My nephew stopped by for cheesecake and my sister and her husband stopped by to locate her son. They declined the offer of cheesecake, and spent a few minutes talking. It's raining and fearful of the rain turning to ice they left.

Oddly I was so good until they came. I got into chips and candy and feeling ashamed. I know it is a reaction to the unexpected visit and that look of condescensation I saw on my sister 's face. But oddly I know my son is more respectful than her children but I don't have the home she has and I always feel judged when she comes over.

So am headed for bed.

Breakfast

maybe some cereal

Lunch

need to eat some salad

Dinner

Plan to fix steak, potato, and corn or green beans for the Phillip

My sister read my note to my son regarding the aviation school and said I emotionally blackmailed my son to take the class. I felt duly chastised, but our way of guiding our kids is different. I wrote him a note saying I saw this aviation class an opportunity and didn't want him to be afraid to venture. So to think it over seriously about going to the class or not.

I guess I did tell him how disappointed I would be if he chose to not go onto this vocational program or the computer one but I told him how I felt---like he had a wrapped Christmas present he refuse to open in case it was what he wanted. I saw him not going as a missed opportunity.

Is this blackmail----emotional blackmail? I guess I felt I was trying to make him see this was important to me, and not to blow it off. So I felt emotionally unsettled when my sister left though she thought it was great Phillip choose to go to this aviation school. She had to throw the barb out about the blackmail. She is never open to his kids. My son and I are very close and share feelings. He looked like he wasn't taking it seriously ---like just changing his electives at random. This aviation class is a 2 yr committment. Not to be taken lightly or blown off lightly in my eyes.

Well almost midnight and need to get to bed. I love my family but know I feel like I'm wearing her judgment like an albatross. CONDEMNED feels like it has been stamped on my forehead. It is crazy to take what she says to heart. My son loved going up in that airplane on Sunday and that is what decided it for him. Yet I keep hearing the word BLACKMAIL and feel condemned over it.

Well, past midnight now by a few minutes and so headed to bed. May take a sleeper so I won't lie awake feeling this sense of failure.

Tomorrow is another day.

Donna

Knew the comment about blackmail would upset me. So woke early unable to get back to sleep and got up with my son and spoke to him if he felt I blackmailed him. He said he felt pressured but that it was the flight he took Sunday that decided it for him. I told him he could tear up the Prosser application he brought home last night if he didn't want to go----I would be disappointed for a couple of weeks but that would be about the extent of it. I don't want him doing something he feels he'll hate. He said it was his decision and so I feel better. He sat next to me in the early morning on the sofa and that silly jealous Lindsey, the pup, nipped me for hugging her bestest buddy. He happens to be my bestest son. Was worth getting up for those hugs and words of reassurance.

Drinking my 20 oz of ice water and got coffee brewing. Want to work on the living room and get the laundry done up before going to work. Sweep the hallway vestible and mop it. This ice water has me cold so guess that means I am going to get my butt in gear and get dressed and get busy. I think a cup of coffee is in order first for am really cold and too early to eat.

Have soft music on and plan to bbq on the grill those steaks I have marinating in the fridge for the bud. I plan to cook them early so I can get my bath and take a long nap before working the 12 hr tonight. Been awake since 5:30 am worrying over what my sister said----went to bed at 1 am. So if I don't nap 7 a.m. will seem like a kind of h&ll and I won't be a pretty site.

Better scoot. Got one little pup to take out too. Have a great weekend and will check back in on DT Monday I guess. Hard to get online the weekends I work.

Donna:wave:

Well tonight is the big sloppy joe night at work----and for Claire I know this bringing the main entree would be a breeze but for me I have some qualms about it and we're talking sloppy joes. Geeze

Crazy lady is back at the hospital and of course I was assigned to her. Made the night FOREVER.

Ate fine, small snack bag of pretzels and a yogurt at work. Home had about 1/3 of bagel sandwich.

Can't sleep----less than 5 hr. What a pain, laid in bed for another hr trying to pretend it was sleep as I watch the clock. Will be another long night----just hope crazy lady is assigned to another team.

Donna

Hello Donna,

I am glad your son enjoyed flying the plane and i do not think you blackmailed him. Pressured him maybe and for the good of him.
I pressure my kids too for things i feel is best for them and there future. it is being a good and loving parent and you are one Donna so dont make anyone make you feel less than that.

My kids forever here the speech of doing good in school and going to college. i am a stickler where education is concerned cuz i want the best for them so i push.
we as moms know what is best for our kids cuz we know them best.

i hope you are having a good weekend and dont have to deal with crazy lady.

take care!

Crazy lady slept and the night was harrowing due to a dying pt going really downhill when my admission arrived. It was a mess for hospice was lined up for the pt when he went home but he was not a hospice pt so I found myself being shuffled from doctor to doctor due to no one wanting to take responsibility for directing his care.

The hospital called for me to work tonight but am really wiped out after the 2-12 hr shifts and said no. The arthritis in my right ankle acts up and can't hardly walk without a limp due to it. It will be okay tomorrow after being up on it for awhile but tonight I'm limping. Guess if I went to work I would get it limbered up but the emotional stress is too much.

The pup got into the livingroom trash can and tore up the sandwich wrappers to Phil's breakfast sandwiches and subway sandwiches. Such a mess and every time I looked at her as I picked up trash saying BAD, BAD, BAD. She avoided me the rest of the night. If my son had been home I'd have had him picking up after her.

I am so physically tired but feel tense. It was a hard weekend. Think I am suffering big nurse burnout.

I know I could get a second job or work more on this job but really not interested. I find myself anxious after working and praying for the pt and other nurses and their family. I can't seem to keep that safe distance I use to have----or maybe never had. Get too emotionally close.

I ate okay but am wanting to eat now, late night and would love some coffee ----haven't had any today. Phil went to my nephew so when I got up it was just me and silly trash-eating dog. By the time he got home I fixed my nephew some of the sloppy joes ( they were a hit) and had some myself. My son tried to persuade me to go out for a burger, Chinese, anything. Told him to forage at home. He had cereal. Won't kill him.

Should head for bed.

Catch you sometime tomorrow, maybe.

Donna:wave:

Hello Donna,

Rest is what you need sweetie and some relaxation.
you sound like you have burnout from all the stress and being so tired.
Do something that really relaxes you and dont worry about everything else. Think of you.

I should practice my own advice now and then.

I got the walk away the pounds tapes and they are so much fun. you get a good workout and its not hard.
the 1 mile one is only 15 minutes long.

well have a good day and get some much needed rest, please...

Tomorrow is another day.

Got to set goal and get moving.

Was a lump today.

Donna

What do you mean you were a lump?!?8-|

I don't believe that!:tongue:

Anyway tomorrow is another day like you said and smile! Do you know that Psychologists say that we don't alway smile because we feel good - we feel good cause we smile! It releases hormones. So smile sweetpea!

Laoise

Hello Donna,

Hard to believe you were a lump as you do so much in one day.
give yourself credit for the things you do accomplish. we are sometimes way to hard on ourselves. i am too.

you are a good person and that is what counts.

take care and keep smiling.

Had soup today and oreo cookies. As Chumlette, would say BAD DONNA.

I ran around all day trying to decide about a car that they had in the paper. It seemed like a real buy when I researched it online and in the local paper and decided that I would check it out. So folded the clothes in the dryer and put the next load in the dryer and left for the dealership. Then came home and got Phil for his orthodontist appt and got a couple hamburgers for him to eat before his appt in case his appt cause his mouth to hurt and he couldn't eat. Went to the car dealership and showed Phil the cars I was looking at and he loved the Taurus.

I am not so sure about its value except plan to keep it till Phil gets thru college unless it doesn't prove dependable. I figure this way he can take either the Kia or the Taurus to colllege, whichever one he likes.

I feel so stress. The Taurus is silver, 4 door, with ABS. Not sure what that means knows it is a safety factor for brakes.

Think I'll make coffee and go to bed. I have so much to do. I put a roast in the crockpot with some seasoning and no water. Yep, I am going to try and refrain from drowning my roast. But in my old bean pot it has to have water over it or be leather tough. So it is hard for me NOT to put some onion and garlic in it and cover it with water.

I figure if it doesn't turn out I will probably shelf that crockpot. I looked into the pot just now and it looked so dry and unappetitizing. Maybe it shouldn't be made with a sirloin roast. Geeze.

Better obscessing over this stupid roast than obscessing over whether to buy this car or not. Will have 2 car payments for about 6 months. So will be tight money-wise but to have the car situation settled till Phillip is thru college I hope.

Then will be home free.

Well, it is heading for midnight and will lay off the coffee t