I was eating my healthy meal and a colleague decided to have a go at me for being on a diet and said that it is silly for me to be counting every calorie and that she favours the no diet approach. I explained to her that I need to relearn about nutruition as I am very overwieght and that the matter is not up for discussion if she is going to be critical with me. Later that day a colleague asked her to something for her and she said that she should ask me as I am wanting to loose wieght. I had to tell her off for being insensitive and explain that although we joke about other stuff, this matter is not open for lighthearted banter as it will upset me.

Later The same day she told me that she is planning to loose weieght and has set herself a target of loosing 1lb per week and asked me for some advise re books and websites etc..
I was glad I was able to turn a negative into a positive but find people so much hard work and in some ways wished I had not mentioned I was on a diet as I know I am being watched now and also that if I am seen eating even a square of choclolate it will be assumed that I have fallen of the wagon rather than counting my calories and allowing myself a treat.
Also my colleague has since confided in me that she feels that I am am a succesful gop setter and that she is not and this sems to be causing problems for her.

Sorry for posting twice

In a strange way, she may be asking you for help. Sometimes it very hard for people to share their diet info.

--or, she may deeply regret sticking her foot in her mouth, and not want there to be any hard feelings over it. This journey makes us very sensitive; try not to take offense where none was intended. :)

ThinLynn

I agree that she may have been asking for help and have been good at giving this to her lending her books aand sharing info. I am a sensitive person anyway that means caring for others as well as my feeling.

Oh Nimna,
Other people can make this journey so hard on us sometimes, not to mention what we do to ourselves! But, it's hard for them, too. She probably did realize she'd done something potentially damaging to you and I wouldn't be surprised if the other co-worker said something to her about it. I'd just walk carefully with her, considering she may lack self esteem, especially if she is overweight, or have other issues you aren't aware of. I think you have a wonderful handle on the situation, based on your post.

As for others watching you, you are probably right. I would, if you're allowed to, post some positive reminder for yourself in your office or cubical to help you through the day. Maybe even place a before picture in a desk drawer. Then, if someone says something to you, use that motivation to stay strong and confident that you are on the right track. Also, I have a motto about dieting that I like to keep reminding myself of:
Deprivation is Diet Suicide

They key to that motto is - Everything in Moderation (something I am often struggling with).

Just thought you might like to use it if someone does catch you having a square of chocolate.

I know you'll be able to work through this and you will reach your desired goal. Just keep up the great job you are doing!
Kerri

I'm sure we can all relate to your story here...I'm glad that you told her how you felt and I'm glad that she came around. I feel that even if this is a sensitive issue for her (and all of us!) this does not give any one the right to go around "dictating rules", giving unwanted advice and hurting other's feelings...Nevertheless,so many people do that! forgetting or ignoring the fact that "unasked for advice, is seldom taken."

I agree that I'd be supportive but also careful with this person. It sounds to me that she may turn on you since it's not clear yet how she's approaching this issue in her life...

I asked my husband not to mention that I was on a diet to anyone! Just because of the reasons you talk about here. People start to watch you and what's worse! (for me anyway) they start to give you advice! Like if we don't know anything or like if we're doing this for the "first time"!hahaha!Ssssuuure! We know what to do! we just need the support to get there! So, we're here for you! Remember that at the end, regardless of what any of them say, what will count is "your" end result. Once you lose all the extra weight, more people will be coming to you for advice! That'll be "your moment"!! In the meanwhile, stay focus (and deaf??) and keep coming here! We'll listen and give you the support you need!

Thank you for sharing! Good luck and keep going! We'll all make it!! :)

Thank you all for your advice and comments. I particularly liked the line deprivation is diet suicide, especially as from my perspective I am trying to save my life as obesity is suicide too.So this saying reminds me of moderation is the key in all things.

The only remark I get from people knowing that I'm trying to lose weight is..IS That allowed on your program??? I always say..I make it allowed. The key is moderation...I just don't over do it.