Starting my new journal....an adventure....considering my commitment issues. I've never been able to keep a journal, or really stand by any type of long term commitment, so we'll see how this goes.

I'm home from our city Pride Parade, sweaty, sunburned, and absolutely giddy:D. I should probably take the time to come out officially to the forum here, so here it goes....i like girls. Always have, always will. I don't want to offend anyone on here, but my being a lesbian will come into play in some of my journal entries...so it should be known. :up: Ok, so now that we have that out of the way, i can explain what happened to me this weekend. Wow.

So, first of all, i've lost 6 inches and 11 lbs this month, and i feel great. I'm more confident, probably look a little cuter, and people are starting to notice. So my friends and i are all going out to the bar on saturday night (to celebrate my birthday and also to celebrate PRIDE). Now to back things up a little bit, my ex-girlfriend and i broke up about a month ago. Very amicable breakup, if there is such a thing, and we were trying to stay friends. So she comes over to pre-drink at my friends house with all of us....and she's giving me long looks, and says that i look great. Fast forward through the evening, she starts kissing me, and :blah: (you get the idea). Now i'm still completely in love with this girl...and from the sounds of it, she's thinking of us getting back together. I'm not sure about it....don't think i can handle being hurt again by her, and i don't think my waistline would do very well after a second break up....so we're going to get together to talk about it all tomorrow night i think....hmmmm....i don't think i should HOPE for a reconciliation...but i am....argh...i hate relationships

Ummm, ok, so i'll update the file, if anyone is even reading this (if not, that's fine too....gives me a chance to rant)....i'll let everyone know what happens tomorrow....wow....this is crazy

Erin :flower:

Hi Erin,

WELCOME TO DIETTALK .... AND TO THE JOURNAL FORUM; first off congratulations on your wonderful 11 POUND LOSS AND 6 INCHES ... :cheer:

I too belong to Curves ( I started in March of this year) and I thoroughly enjoy going .... meeting people and making new friends.

The fact that you are here means YOU HAVE MADE A COMMITMENT TO SUCCEED ... WHICH IS A BIG PLUS :up: Don't give up on yourself BECAUSE YOU WILL SUCCEED .. TAKE IT ONE DAY AT A TIME .. ONE MEAL AT A TIME

Again welcome to DT and to being a part of our Diettalk family. Always, Monica :wn

Hello and welcome,

I am on ww too. it is so great you lost 11 pounds in a month, did you just start the program?

breakups are so hard and i am remarried and dont miss the dating scene at all and i hope things go well for you with your talk with your ex.

keep strong and take care.

Hi Erin,
You are doing great so far. I'll check to see how you are doing once in a while because I am thinking about Curves. But I've been moving back and forth across the country. Once I get that sorted out I might give it a go. Welcome on board.
Pat

Hey! Welcome ITL! You have done an AMAZING job with the weight and inches loss for a MONTH. Damn, girl. You are rockin'. Keep it up!!!

Ok folks, i'm so sorry its taken me so long to respond....its been a few crazy days...wow.

First of all, thanks to everyone on the support. I'm loving these little "smilies"... :) Ok, now, on to more pressing matters....So, my ex and i get together on monday night to discuss what happened on the weekend. We went to the park, walked around and talked...we both decided (after hours of talking), that we obviously have unresolved feelings for each other. It was pretty clear that the chemistry and the love are still there, so we decided that we would try to ease back into it slowly...sort of start dating again...and see where it takes us. We both want to be a part of each other's lives....

So tuesday night rolls around (cheap movie night)...and in the spirit of taking things slowly and "dating" again, i called her up and invited her to a movie. She agreed and we went out and had a good time. So we're sitting in her truck in my driveway, and she reaches over and starts playing with my hair, then she starts kissing me, and the next thing i know, we're in my house, and all over each other again. So much for restraint, and "taking it slow"....theres a lot to be said for people who are able to do this. I don't know....i think that we're falling into the same trap that killed our relationship the first time....we moved too fast, and spent SO MUCH time together, that when our individual lives got busy, we didn't know how to have a relationship as well.....ARHG i say:tomato:

On a happier note, i bought a GREAT digital scale:dc ....it goes up by 0.2lbs...i LOVE it....and so far, after my weigh in this tuesday....i've lost another 3 lbs....making the GRAND TOTAL....(drumroll please!)...14 lbs! :jn And the best part is that i'm feeling great!

I'm going to see if i can scan a picture of me that made it into our newspaper of our Pride Parade...you can see how i look minus almost 15lbs! Yeehaw!!!

Can i put a picture on here? Anyone know??

I'm just sitting at work here, where i do most of my posting....chugging my water....so post some stuff, to keep me busy (and awake....)

Take it easy for now everyone!

Erin :flower:

Hi Erin

Congrats on the 14#, that's terrific!:D

Don't know how old you are, but take it from one who's been around the block a few times, sex, even great sex won't cement a relationship forever, eventually you have to come up for air and deal with the realities of the relationship.
Maybe since you're conscious of the "pitfalls" you and your girlfriend had the first time around, one of which was going too fast, maybe you could plan specific dates several days apart rather than "winging it" with a phone call and getting together all the time. That way with the "planned" dates for a while, you can take it slow, do more talking by phone and email, and rebuild the connection on more than a physical level. And maybe set some ground rules for not falling into the same traps you both did the first time around.
You seem (through your posts) to be rather excited about the possibility of a reconciliation, so I hope it works out for you, but keep your eyes open and focused, it's really easy to lose ourselves in someone else and forsake our own goals, especially when we fall in love.

Good luck,

Donna

Donna,

You're right, i am excited about the possibility of a reconciliation. She's an amazing woman, and we have a lot of fun together. I think that's a good idea...to have some planned "dates" for awhile, (trying to not include sex in them), and see how things go for a little while. I'm 21, and she is turning 23 today! We're both in school, and working, and that makes our relationship quite strained, because we have little time for ourselves, let alone for each other.

Don't worry, i'll keep everyone posted about how things are going. It's her birthday today, but we've already decided that we're going to probably see each other on the weekend (when she is celebrating her birthday)...

Thank you so much for the advice...i'll let you know how it goes :)

Erin :flower:

:wave: Hi Erin.


A Belated WELCOME TO JOURNALS...............

Congratz on the pounds down. So where's the scanned Pic? :D

maximum....


i don't even know if i can do that??? it's kinda big. but i can't do it right now....i'm at work....i'll have to do it later on....i'll post it, no worries :)

Gives you a reason to keep coming back and checking my thread:D

Erin :flower:

:up:

Erin,

Congratulations on your 14 pounds. I can also tell by your journal postings that you are really excited about getting back together with this "amazing woman", as you call her. She must be one lucky girl. I say take it slow for now and see what happens. As I've learned from experience, if you jump right back into things without taking the time to let things cool off, it'll be the same 'ol thing from before with the same problems. Make her WANT you back. Make her EARN you back. You're worth it.

Sarah:)

Sarah,

I know that i should make her want me....but its so hard when you want that person just as much or more maybe....a dangerous situation to be in. Thank you for the support and encouragement to lose the first 14lbs....many more to go!

Thank you for the advice...i'm in limbo right now...not together, but not apart, its so strange...i feel like there are all these boundaries that i've crossed, and that i want to cross but i shouldn't....does that make any sense?

Oh well, life is about risks right? You have to take them to discover true happiness...being safe and comfortable doesn't mean that you're happy.

Too much to think about while i'm troubleshooting at work....gotta run for now!

Erin. :flower:

Erin,

You know what they say, "Love like it's never going to hurt."
I am the kind of person to play it safe. You are more of a risk taker, Erin.

Keep up the positive energy.

Sarah

You're right, i am a bit more of a risk taker, but those people who take risks tend to get hurt much more. I'm afraid to put myself on the line, but at the same time, i'm afraid not to. Life is so crazy that way. I just want to be happy.

I think i'll wait things out...see what happens :)

Erin :flower:

P.S.-I'll keep the board posted .... until next time....

Hey there Erin!!

Way to go on the great weight loss!! Do you have any pointers for the rest of us that are on WW? I am only into my 2nd week but so far I have lost 4.2lbs. But I love getting suggestions. :)

I was reading a few of your posts about your ex and I think everyone has given some super duper advice. I think the ones I agree with most, is setting specific date night. Did you discuss with her why your relationship fell apart before? I think you need to talk about that to see if you are both ready to change that habit or whatever it may have been. I can tell you are totally excited about it and I admire the way you are willing to jump back in. Just please be careful and look before you leap!!

Best of luck!
Tasha