:)
If people could just see you for who you are, your inner beauty, no matter how fat or thin or pretty or ugly, what would you be?
It seems to me that we spend a lot of time trying to lose weight and I just wonder what our motives are?
Is it really about the way we see ourselves or are we just worried about what other people think.
Is being fat who you are?
Are we what we weigh?
I think I'm more than a number...but sometimes I can't get out of the mode of just thinking about diet, food, exercise...I don't want to "BE" weightloss, I want to "BE" someone that I can be proud of and that is courteous to others.
If you could look like anyone, who would you look like?
Who is your hero? Why?
:rose:

If people could see me for who I am, I would be a quiet, gentle and amazing woman. I would be someone who could get things done efficiently and I would be peaceful.
I think that people don't realize that fat people have feelings and that they think we aren't worth as much as thin beautiful people, especially in the work place.
Funny, I don't feel fat, it just shows up in the mirror or in pix.
If I could look like anyone I wanted to, I think I would like to look Jennifer Lopez when she played in Selena or Anaconda...Not the nasty stuff she gets herself into now.
My hero is ... me! I just realized that...but after some soul searching, I have really been victorious in a lot of things and I will continue. Wow! That's cool!:)

it depends on if it was the "stuck in traffic" me or the "loving baby" me.:D

I don't believe, anymore, society sees "size" so much as "actions." I see a family in the park eating Doritos and KFC, leaving behind litter, I think "slobs" whether they're big OR little. I see a woman running the waterfront, I think "Go, GIRL!!" big OR little. Maybe I'm impressing my points of view into society's, and maybe society isn't really like that. But I think, when I was big, people saw the big chick with a chip on her shoulder, who was angry at the skinny chicks for being genetic mutants. They didn't see the smiling happy accepting Jess, they saw the Jess who shunned people before they could shun her.

?? idle musings, I suppose. I think people *do* see the real me, a mom, a mate; I smile, I laugh, I shout, I cry. I suppose if I *could* look "like" someone, I'd be Cameron Diaz, because she's the anti-Jess ( I could NEVER look like her.) Or Meg Ryan. But I'm happy as me, dunno that I could call myself my hero, but I can be proud to be me...

Interesting questions. There are so many different "real me"s depending on the situation and who I'm with. Or maybe I'm just a chameleon. And sometimes the way I act is perceived differently by others. I've always been very shy and very private. When I get to know someone, I open up. So people who only know me a bit perceive me as cold or snobbish.

And I guess because I feel so private, I'm not given to complete answers to questions like this :) In general, I see myself as smart, competent, caring, and sensitive. I don't know if others see that or not.

Who do I want to look like? There's nobody I want to look like. Just myself, fit and healthy.

Hero? Uhm, never really thought about it. There are certainly people I admire for various reasons, but nobody I can think of off the bat that calls to me as "hero."

If others took the time to get to know my heart and spirit, I think they would find a thoughtful , caring, and sensitive person. They would see that I like to help others and I enjoy learning from others. They would see that I am open and honest. They would see that God is very important to me and I try to live His will.

I thinks others would see my many sides. I am confident..I am insecure. I am shy...I am outgoing. I am serious...I am funny. I am intellectual...I am emotional. My interests are as varied as my personality.

I asked my thirteen year old and he said I was smart, funny and "churchy." My husband said I was smart, funny, analytical, determined and dedicated. (OK he said I was critical too.)Now I will have to get a woman's point of view next! LOL!

Physically, I would like to look like Jaclyn Smith. Intellectually I would like to be like Thomas Jefferson. Spiritually I aspire to be more like Jesus. My personal heroes are Jesus and my husband.

WOW! Great Post! I'm speechless...You really know yourself well and you've about summed me up in a nutshell. Way to go! WOW!:rose:

The real me:
Is a bruised ego.
Who is to into her own self to trully give a damn about anyone else.

My weight is just a physical problem. My weight loss journey hasn't been way difcult. It is slower now because I am lazy. If I just back to the program I will be on track again.

My biggest job is working on the inner me, so I can be prepared to deal with someone else's crap.

:D Hearing ya and feeling ya! I feel like this too, a lot, I wish I didn't but sometimes it's just a matter of getting through the day without emotionally crippling someone for life or beating the crap out of them! Hmmm...Thank God for restraint....

One time on Roseanne...Jackie was reading the newspaper and commented that a lady had stabbed her husband 157 times...Roseanne says "Man, I admire her restraint!" Ha!

If people were able to see the real me, they'd see a creative, funny woman. An outgoing woman, even, who has been naughtily hiding behind her fat! Oy. Will have to do something about that.

I hope they would also see someone who loves her family, someone who is nice, pretty, loves her kittens! They'd see Rikki: Goddess

Rikki:D

Incredible questions!!!

I have often thought of this... what if we had no eyes to see, no way to tell what we looked like, what others looked like, what we measure up in comparison to another. In all honesty, I think "I" would be lost.

Inside, I am a sincere, generous, caring, and sensitive girl. I really am happy with who I am inside. But unfortunately, if I'm unhappy with my outsides, I find it so hard to be the person I truly want to "be".

I envy those who do not judge themselves or others and can just "be" who they are inside. I have trouble letting go of "appearance" issues, and I let them affect my self-esteem way too much.

Thank you for your insightful inquiries!

Originally posted by Kyarahh


I have often thought of this... what if we had no eyes to see, no way to tell what we looked like, what others looked like, what we measure up in comparison to another.

I personaly believe we would discrimanate on accent at this point.

I feel people search out things to distinguish themselves from.

Oi you all may not like me after this.

It depends on how well you want to know me. I come off as shy at first but once you know me as a friend you'll see me as happy-go-lucky, easily amused, funny and intelligent. I am fun to hang out with especially if there is a little alcohol involved. I am in touch with the child in me and that seems to make people feel comfortable acting like idiots around me. :D

I am close to my family. My daughter and unborn baby are the most important people to me in the world. I am a great mum.

If you get to know me too well you'll see that I am very opinionated and critical of myself and other people. Not to mean I am judging you but I do see what is wrong with everyone before I see what is good about them. It is something I have been working on for years to fix. I am a perfectionist and not easily satisfied. I am hard to live with, I don't know why my BF loves me, if I were him I would have left a long time ago. I live in extremes, there is no happy medium. I am very emotional and have a hard time dealing with my own feelings. Some people think I am selfish but the truth is that I care too much for other people and their feelings and want to make everyone happy. I hate to see other people hurt or upset.

I would like to look like me but thinner and fit with thicker hair and a perfect complexion. My hero is my mum because if you knew what she's been through to get where she is you'd understand.

If people could see me for who I am, they would see a creative, sensitive, outgoing, intellectual, romantic.
They would know that my satisfactions come from making other people happy, and helping anyone who is in need.
They would know that I love the elderly and appreciate their wisdom, and that I have volunteered much of my life to them.
They would know that I am politically bull-headed, and no one could change ever my mind. (hint* republicans need not apply)LOL
They would know that I am determined spirit completely driven to complete or improve any task handed to me or that I seek out.
The would also know that I am very emotional, and that it takes little to hurt me.
By the same token they would know that I don't get mad..I get even LOL
They would know that I'm a day dreamer, and that a day doesn't go by when I don't dream.
They would know that I love poetry, to recite, and to write.
They would see someone who always just wanted to be loved and accepted, and sometimes would sacrifice who I really am to achieve this.

I'm a daughter,
a wife,
a mother,
a teacher,
a student,
a nurse,
a companion,
a friend.....

My ideal body, would be that of Jamie Lee Curtis (sure her face isn't that great....but the body OMG)
My ideal determination would be that of Bill Clinton
My ideal intellectual understanding would be that of Harry Truman
All of this while posessing the love and patience of Mother Theresa.

Wow, I never knew all of this about myself until I sat down and wrote this.
Thank you so much for posing the question!

Melanie

I am a person without a face...I mean I have one, but never spent much time looking at my face or anyone else's. I am a neck down person. It's so wierd, but If I ever had to do a police lineup...I wouldn't be able to identify anybody.
I don't know why this is. Right now, this month, I have been trying to look in the mirror at myself in the face, and tell myself good things about me...and I inevitably end up having to remind myself to look myself in the face.
I don't trust people and am very much like star in finding faults before what's right...I don't know why I do that. I try to dislike people before they dislike me, so if they do dislike me, I don't hurt as much. I can brush it off, by saying, I didn't like them first.
I used to make fun of myself first, so it would numb me from other people making fun of me. I am the baby, the youngest, of a very very large amount of children, to this day no one gets along, but it's a lot of back stabbing, arguing Jerry Springer type stuff...and I'm NOT exaggerating.
Our family used to have to look perfect on the outside for my dad, but we didn't much care what we looked like to other people...he was just afraid we'd be taken away and he'd be locked up in jail.
You know....
I don't have much respect for people, but that's because I don't have much respect for myself...but I'm working on it.
I have made a lot of strides...but there is still a heck of a lot of work needed to be done...
I thank God for where I am at, even though I've got still a lot more to go, but I'm glad I'm not where I was! I'm okay, and I will change and grow and guess what, I'm even learning to like me and others.
I used to think I was the least selfish person in the whole world...that I care for others to be happy...but I recently found out I am of the most selfish people in the world, because I isolate myself alot in effort to protect myself, which makes me think I'm spending my time focused on "ME".
I don't want to be that anymore. :)

"If people could just see you for who you are, your inner beauty, no matter how fat or thin or pretty or ugly, what would you be?"

i think people still do that..some people never go by looks alone.and some do..i would still would be the same person i am now..

"It seems to me that we spend a lot of time trying to lose weight and I just wonder what our motives are?"

well... mine are just to take advantage of my hour glass figurer ..all i am doing is shaping it,toning it,building muscles..and getting rid of the bits to make me smaller where it needs to be smaller and i am able to...i always enjoyed those paintings where there are hour glass figurer girls with flat tummys...and THAT will be me soon!

" Is it really about the way we see ourselves or are we just worried about what other people think."

well for me its how i see myself..i really couldnt give a hoot what people or society think about me..cuz lets face it even if i was skinny mini...there would be a lot of people out there that would say something else is wrong with my bod...so who cares...


"Is being fat who you are?"

No. Fat is just part of the body....its not part of my soul...when i die i leave my body behind..so no fat isnt part of who i am..


"If you could look like anyone, who would you look like? "

just the chicks in those paintings i said about...not look like them..just have that flat tum that makes the hour glass figurer more flattering..

The real me? I think I'm caring, sensitive, independent (fiercely so, at times which makes me hard to live with!).

I think what I'm coming to realize lately is that I can be a much stronger person than I ever imagined, although I'm often too timid and too concerned with what others think of me to really, truly be myself. My confidence has taken a few hits, with the adjustment of graduating college into an uncertain job market, with the adjustment of moving into an undesirable living arrangement (again, my fierce independence becomes a problem), struggling to learn everything about the new city I moved to when people take such things for granted... All of it is difficult, but I'm overcoming challenges left and right lately.

I wouldn't want to look like anyone else... I think I have a lot of potential, but I just need to take better care of my health and then I can be so proud of what I've done for myself... and I'll keep doing other things to strive toward happiness... that I'll become my own hero. :)

I have been wanting to post on this thread for a long time...and I finally think I have the time too....

If someone saw the real me... They would see that above all I believe in family.. that i would do absolutly anything for my family... that I would sacrifice my career for the health of my family... my brother is ill with a neuro muscular disease, and, I would rather be ill for him... I still feel that way....

I think people would see that I do a lot for others, and maybe not enough for myself... that I need to sit, and breathe... I think I would be admired by others, for standing up for what I believe in and being stubborn... I am currently on a religious path, and begin the early stages of converting to judaism. I think people would see me as dedicated to my beliefs...

I hope that people would see me as beautiful, and kind... that I would do much for my neighbor. :)

if people saw me for who i was, they would see that im not as quiet and reserved as i seem. they would see that family, friends and faith are the most important aspect of my life. im a very open and compassionate person if people take the time to know me, and im very deep as well. they'd see my quiet love of art, how i use writing, photography and music to open up. they'd know that im very opinionated and passionate about my beliefs, and that i want to make changes...but theyd also see that i am very accepting of others. they'd see that ive fallen many times but ive picked my self up every time. they would know that im still confused about many things in my life, and that im still trying to find myself and where i want to be

Wow some good questions- hitting above the belt! I too like the person I am inside but am not thrilled with the outside either. Family always trys to help,but so few of them have ever had weight issues, it falls on deaf ears (mine).
I am generous,loving,giving,caring. But I can tend to judge people at times and also have trouble letting go of appearances issues which in turn affects my self esteem.
If I could look or be like someone famous I would choose Sandra Bullock. I love her movies because I feel the people she portrays in her movies are pretty close to the way she probly is in life.
My children are my heroes. They inspire me to be a better mother and to know that I am loved and needed. They do not judge me, oh my son may roll his eyes around in his head sometimes at the things I say or do sometimes.LOL 8-| But they keep me grounded. Barbara :peace: