Well here it is quite a few months later and I'm trying it again. I never made my goals before my trip but I am bond and determined to meet them the next coming year and beyond. I re-started my diet this week Monday 15-11-2004 and have been going good. I have noticed in the past that I can go strong for a couple of weeks, lose a few kilo (6/8pounds) but then somewhere lose my way and take a LONG time to get back on. This last time I even put on over 10pounds. I was not happy with this when I went on the scale Monday morning.

Last night was a hard night and the first thing I did was want chocolate or that fact anything sweet. Was even in that part of my moods where I just wanted to cry because I was having such bad cravings. Don't know if men have this problem or not but I bet most woman do when they cut out the things their bodies crave but definitely don't need. The second thing I did was make a sandwich and grabbed a sweetened ice tea (to help with the ever so bad craving). The third thing I did was logged into here for the first time in months. I was even shocked that I still had an active account being I've been gone for so long. I'm glad it wasn't deleted.

I went to bed quite late. It was nice for a change but made for a VERY long day. I had been up since something like 7:30am and didn't get to actually sleeping until close to 2am. Even with this long day I still managed to stay just under 2000 calories and didn't do all that bad on fats either. That even included another sandwich and a hand full of Cheeto Puffs a bit before actually going to bed.

Although I felt like yesterday was a really bad day YESTERDAY, today I look back on it now that I'm in a better mood and realize it wasn't all that bad and keep reminding myself that today is weekend and I can be a bit more relaxed on my diet. That I do get to allow myself some treats. Today I will still stick to my diet for everything but come the late afternoon I will be making pasta. I will dive in fork first but the way I will make it will mean yes I do have a higher calorie count but my fat count should be low as well as allowing myself to have that "pig out". I will eat my fill but not my overfill per say.

I am feeling in MUCH better spirits today and know most of the time after a nights sleep that I can start the next day out in better terms and mood. Today I woke and made breakfast for my husband and me. I boiled some eggs because I am going to make some home-made egg salad and with that I boiled a couple extra and made boiled egg sandwiches. I will post the recipe in the recipes form later today. It was good. The fat was a bit high but I look at my diet not in terms of EXACTLY how much things are but WHAT they are. In this case it was egg with a piece of cheese and because it's weekend a TINY bit of mayo. I even shared a large orange with the hubby. It was filling and also satisfying to say the least.

It really does amaze me how much you really do appreciate the foods you try not to eat but still do on occasion when you diet. This morning's egg with that little bit of mayo and cheese SOOOO hit the spot that I almost wanted to cry in happiness. I remember the same feeling last time I tried to do this when I allowed myself to have a SERVING only of Cool Ranch Doritos. I had them with my lunch and that WHOLE afternoon I remember not being munchy at all even though it was a lazy afternoon (not much going on besides the usual making dinner and doing dishes to keep my attention).

I hope this time around I can fight off those "bad days" with the thoughts in my mind of WHY *I* want to lose weight. As I think of these I'm going to update my journal. I'm going to start here today with the list I have so far and later as I see things on TV, hear things on the radio, see something or hear something that triggers a "reason" that I think is a good thing to loose weight for, I will post it here to remind myself that someday that is something *I* want to happen.

The day I think has gone well. I had my pasta and enjoyed it and this time it even kept me feeling "not hunger" until quite late tonight. I did have another sandwich, some fruit and some more Cheetos (haven't even finished the Cheetos yet) but even with counting 21ounces of cooked pasta made with egg on FitDay I am still under my 2000 calorie mark and my fat yes could better but is still a WHOLE lot better then if I was not doing this. I think tomorrow I'll do that boiled egg sandwich thing again. That really did hit the spot this morning and gave me something I could make the hubby too. The day went well but tonight I am feeling a bit poorly. Nothing major but run down and a bit of an upsetish tummy. Think I just wanted too long to take in more calories/energy. Not sure if my tiredness is due to actually BEING tired now or because I waited too long to eat something again. Hubby is going to go have a lay down with me and we'll see what happens. I would like to stay up longer but if I don't it just means I'll be up earlier tomorrow. But it is weekend.... a time meant to enjoy being up late :). I know I'll feel better after a good nights rest in the end though. Goodnight world... this is my last post in my "journal" for the night.

P.Sish. Thanks to whoever it was out there (if they even read this) that I first saw that "tickerfactory" thing on their posts. I really liked it and now have one of my own. Thanks again.

Here is that list I mentioned before of the reasons WHY *I* want to lose weight. I'm posting this here not only for me but in hopes that someone can read it and go "yea, that sounds like something to reach for" and help inspire them to continue on. Mind you there are SOME goals in which I won't post here only for the reason they are just too personal or they involve someone that just doesn't wish to have their life known to the world (my hubby in most cases ;))

1. My health. Above all else my health means the world to me. So far medically speaking my health is good except the fact that I am severely over weight and I wish to keep it that way. The only way I will insure that is if I DO lose the extra weight. If I am not healthy I do not have any energy, if I am not healthy I can not enjoy my time with my husband, if I am not healthy I will have less days to enjoy everything out there that the world has to offer.

2. My Husband. Without him the world means nothing to me. He is my life-support. He is my life. If I do not lose the weight, I will have less days to enjoy being around him, if I do not lose weight I will not be able to go out and do the things we want to like traveling, if I do not lose weight I will never get to explore the world with him.

3. Myself. Without me, myself and I there would be no life. I am the one that has to keep kicking myself to keep going.... no matter WHAT that something is that I need to keep going on. It is I that am always there for myself. If I do not lose the weight then it is I that will be yelling at myself for years to come. It is *I* that will have to live with it for the rest of my life.

4. My Mother. A) Without her I would not here. She has brought my into this world and I would hate for her to see me pass away before her because something of my health is wrong solely because of my weight. B) She will be coming to visit me come Christmas 2005. This may be the only time that she gets to come here to visit me. Yes I get to visit her but if I do not lose weight NOW then when she comes out to me I will not be able to show her all of the things that she wants to see, experience and enjoy while she is here.

5. My Father. A) I have not been very close to him in the past but the days have passed and we have both changed. I want to show him that his littlest daughter has grown up to be someone. That she has grown out of the "bad child" she use to be and has become a proper grown adult. I want to show him that *I* can change and that I will not end up being something he will regret in his passing days. B) I hope that he too will be coming to visit come Christmas 2005 with my mother. Again, if I do not lose weight NOW, I will not be able to show him the adult I've grown to be. Without his help as well, I would not be who I am today.

6. My Oldest Sister. She has been there every time for me and I feel that somewhere along the way of her being my Big Sister that I became her's. I use to look up to her and wanted to be like her but now a days it seems to be the complete opposite with me being the Big Sister and her the little one. I want to show her that losing weight CAN be done if you just stick to it. I want to show up at her door the next time I come to visit the States and have her shocked because I am half the person that I was the last time I came to visit. If she is looking up to me.... I want to be a good role model and show her things CAN be done if you only put yourself behind it.

7. My Self-Esteem. I want to be able to walk down the roads and such of Belgium and not feel COMPLETELY out of place. Living in the USA, I didn't feel so bad because there were so many people there that were also over weight but now living in Belgium where the weight has not become such a problem yet I feel completely out of place while walking down the street. I had the other day even a younger boy (very young... most likely still in his very early teens) make fun of me and he didn't even know who I was. I want to lose weight so I do not stand out so much in that kind of way from everyone else.

8. Clothes Shopping. I want to be able to go to a store here in Belgium and try anything I want on and know that they will have a size that fits me. Again, being that Belgium does not have that much of a problem with the weight stuff here, most stores do not offer larger sizes. If I do not lose weight there will become a time where I will not be able to get clothes here in Belgium at all. At the moment I still travel to the USA almost once a year and at that time I buy clothes there. I want to be able to just say, "I need a new pair of pants" and then be able to go to the local store and pick out a pair without worry if that store will carry a size that fits.

9. Food Shopping. I love food as I'm sure most of us do. I know from looking at my past budget that I spend a LOT more on food when I'm not dieting and a lot less when I AM dieting. I love shopping being if it's grocery, clothes, or for nothing really at all. This goal is to live healthier when I go grocery shopping and to try and save some money (only to spend it somewhere later without putting on weight ;))

10. Photos. My husband has been into taking pictures of me. Some I think have turned out VERY well and I am going to pick one of them to put on here with my posts. This goal is to make myself comfortable with being in pictures. To be able to look at those pictures with me in them and not feel like I am a blimp next to the other "normal" weight people.

11. Plane Rides. As mentioned before I go traveling to the States around once a year. I can still fit next to people if needed but am really still comfortable in a 2 seater next to the window by myself. I want to get to a weight where sitting next to someone doesn't cause me to rest my leg against their's, I want to be able to sit in a seat and get the seat belt around me without having to ask for an extension and I want to be able to get that little tray in front of me to come down completely, not just half way.

12. Motivation/Energy. When I am eating properly and "diet" style, I notice that I have a lot more energy and a lot more "want" to do things that I found a pain to get up and do. I want to eat healthy and lose weight so that I KEEP that energy and built it more so I can succeed in doing more with my life.

13. Bras (sorry guys this is a more personal thing but perhaps you can relate with having to find shirts that fit your chests). I have this problem and have had for a VERY long time. I (like a lot of severely over weight woman) have a big chest. I hope losing weight will lessen that a bit but will also help me find a bra that I can fit into without worrying if it's from a special shop or not. Cup size isn't my problem but the actual "chest" size is.... that all important number with the cup-size. I would love to see some day in the future me going for a chest size of like 36 or even lower if my bone structure allows it.

14. My Complexion. I have heard it, read it, seen it happen. It seems that some over weight people just tend to have a poor skin complexion. I am one of those. When I was in my teens I didn't have such a problem with pimples and such and starting in my early 20's and now getting into my late 20's I am still having that problem. Arms, back and face. My face is getting better but that is something I can work hard on even without diet. I guess I'm hoping that when I do lose (remember I used the word WHEN not IF) the weight that my skin will become the fair milkily complexion that is typical of a late 20's blonde.

15. My Back. I have always had a VERY strong back (and yes I'm taking as in the thing you lay down on and is the opposite of your stomach). More so when I was in school then now though. I do have to blame this on the weight. I vowed when I was younger and putting on more and more weight that I would NEVER have on of those butts that you could see curve in at the very top and "wiggle". Unfortunately that hasn't happened and I have resorted to wearing those ever so popular big baggy shirts to hide it. This goal is to make it that I get enough weight off that my back feels better and LOOKS better. I know if I get the weight off that my back will straighten back to it's original shape with less stress on it. This perhaps will also help with the Plane Ride goal, making it more comfortable for me to sit for long periods of time (it is a 9 hour flight direct from Belgium to Chicago)

16. Energy. I have for most of my life been that "long afternoon nap" type person. When I eat properly, smaller/more often, cut out as much refined sugars (bad carbs) as I can and replace them with unrefined sugars (good carbs) I feel I'm more awake all together. When I eat properly I have almost so much energy I don't know what to do with myself sometimes. I like having this feeling. I want to remember that when I do eat bad that I will not feel this way and sometimes even feel worse because I eat too badly.

17. Mini Rewards. I have set up a mini-goals for myself. The first one is to get under 150kilo (330pounds). When I reach this weight my husband is going to put up some candle chandelier. They are round and have I think 8 candle holders in them (that hold tea-lights I believe) and it hangs from the ceiling like well yea duh... a chandelier :D . They are beautiful and I love candles. They will be so nice to curl up under on cold winter nights. I haven't anything else planned yet but I'm sure I will as days go on.

(always more to come)

Hi, Missy! :wave: You are doing a great job with your goal setting and sticking to your objectives. I can so relate to your discussion of cravings ... it seems you are handling them very well.

I love your reasons for losing weight, especially #3: "Myself ... Without my, myself and I there would be no life. ..."

So true.

You'll do 'er!!! Keep going! :cheers:

Hi gal! You said you started a journal so thought I would pop over and say hi.

Are your boiled egg sandwhichs like egg salad sandwhiches? That does sounds good.

Keep up the great job!

C ya :wave:

HiHi :) Glad you were able and wanting to stop by. I really do love typing and this is a great way for me to get that in. There was even a time in my life that because I was gaming so much that it was hard to get a good speed with my typing anymore, even though I've been typing since I was something like ooo 8years old :) gotta love those old C64's.

The sandwiches are nothing like egg salad (I make that home-made as well), they use a full boiled egg (not mashed up) and the mayo I used was just like you would spread on a sandwich. I posted it in the recipe forums. http://www.diettalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=45126

I'll be always writing more. There is nothing to say that I will be able or even wanting to put a journal entry in everyday but it certainly isn't a bad thing :) Do you have a journal going?? if so what is the link if I may ask?

Not much to say this am...but Good morning! Below is the link to my journal. Have a great day!! I've, finally, got a nice quiet day at home, for the most part. Plan on doing some housework, working on more christmas gifts and watching the last nascar race before taking my son to play practice. sounds exciting huh!! lol Talk to you later!


http://www.diettalk.com/forums/showthread.php?p=471189&posted=1#post471189

Sorry I haven't gotten to typing at you sooner Mike.... I have been on the forums a lot today and LOTS of typing. It's good to hear that you've gotten some "quiet" time. I think I get that a little too often since my husband is the only one working now. I clean a lot. With that thought though I have to ask, do you use www.fitday.com at all? I have been using it for some time now and found that I burn a WHOLE lot of calories for cleaning the house. I even make a point of actually getting down and dirty to cleaning when it's bad weather out just so I work on some of those calories. I burn MORE calories cleaning my apartment with a lot of effort then I do for walking for the same amount of time. I thought it was great :)

Let me know how you day has been. I'm not much into watching any kind of sport though... I usually am the one wanting to play in it. I'm going to post my daily journal after this if you're interested in how my day has gone. I'm also going to start using my journal as a place to keep track of WHAT I ate through the day. I figure if people are going to look at my journal in the first place, then they best as well know WHAT I'm doing... specially if it's working and keeps working. Besides, then I can better look at what it is I'm eating and not just the broken down look that I get on FitDay.

Hugs babe and take care of that son :)

Well another day has gone and I'm feeling relatively good. My calories, carbs, fat, and protein are in a percent level I can deal with. I have not gone over my own allowed 2000 calories even though I had 20grams of dark chocolate and some Cheeto puffs. Today has seemed like a VERY long day though time wise. I'm not unthankful for this because my husband is home and all (he has off even Monday and Tuesday because our 3rd year wedding anniversary is on Tuesday the 23rd) but it really does make me hope and almost pray that the days he IS at work go a bit faster. Perhaps because it is weekend... that it is even a Sunday... the the time has gone so slow. I am starting to feel tired and unlike last night, I'm feeling good tummy wise for now.

Last night for some reasons I was having some trouble. I was not feeling all that well and I have no idea why. Sometimes in the evenings, especially around bedtime, I get a semi upset tummy and sometimes even more then semi upset. I never am sick (so far) from them and in a few hours (or less) they are gone and I'm feeling right as rain. I think it might just be gas or something. Last night it had to be. I was having problems with that but I figured I would with the "healthier" eating I've been doing this week. I do get a lot more veggies and fruits then I do when I'm not eating properly. Makes the body work differently to digest it when it is use to. The only reason I believe this to be the case is because I had nothing to eat after my pasta at 3pmish until close to 9pm and my problems started just before that. So I kinda ruled out that I must have eaten something that didn't agree with me. I even got up in the middle of the night (went to bed around 12ish and woke around 1:30amish) and went to sleep the rest of the night on the couch because the living room is the heated room in the house. We keep the bedrooms cool since there is no real need to heat them unless we're in them and not to mention most of the time we're all snuggled up next to each other under a heavy comforter. I'm glad these things pass in a small amount of time. I think the worse thing in the world for me sickness wise is the tummy flu. I'd even rather have a full body flu (colds, sniffs, aches and the like) then have to deal with an upset tummy that won't quit.

Today I'm feeling much better but I think I did a booboo earlier. It was around 3pm when my husband and I decided we waited a bit too long to have something to eat again. I know I certainly did when I started looking for food that was quick and still on my diet. I decided on a can of supreme tomato soup. Low in calories/fat and it was going to be my main meal anyhow. I decided while looking through the cupboards, that I would add some of these already made little dumpling type things (made for soup) in it. The only thing I DIDN'T do is read how long they took to cook before I poured them INTO the soup. They take 20-25minutes. When I realized this I even said out loud that I could of made a meat and potatoes meal at this rate. At this point I was pissed but I knew it was too late to do anything. I was starving so I figured I'd behave while they cooked (wasn't like I was going anywhere or anything) and took myself an apple. Cut it up and ate it while sitting here reading some more. Shortly after that my soup was ready and my apple gone. I started in on my soup and started to feel really tired but not in a sleepy way but in a "I'm not feeling right" way. I had my husband make me a sandwich with protein (some chicken lunch meat) and some lettuce. I ate that and continued to eat some of my soup. I felt better soon after but I think because of that apple being the first thing I ate for 3 hours and not eating something with it that would counter act the sugar that I got a bit bothered by the "sugar" rush. Something I don't quite understand is why I can handle eating large amounts of sweets (cookies, donuts and the such) with hardly anything else and not feel bothered by them but when I'm eating sensibly that something like an apple at the wrong point or without something with it, can make me feel so awful.

I've decided starting today that I am also going to (more for myself then anyone else) start keeping a list of food I eat everyday. I don't read much in the journals because there are so many other forums out there and I also figure that these are more for our use then anyone else's. But in the same way I know people do read them and offer their comments on them from time to time and well if someone is going to keep track of how I am doing then they might as well know HOW I'm doing it and what is keeping me doing it. I won't get as detailed as to times and such that I eat things but put in what I made and with what. This is more for me then anyone else though. I do use the www.fitday.com site but with that I have to break everything I eat up into such small things that I sometimes don't remember what it exactly was that I ate.

Well, as said earlier, it's getting late. I'm going to read a for a few more and then I think I'm going to turn in. So for tonight (with exception of making that new post of my food today) this will be my last post in here. Good-night everyone and stay strong. In the end we can ALL do this if we just keep fighting together.

Here it is folks. The list I said I was going to start for keeping track of the food I am eating. I mentioned in another post that this is mainly for my benefit but that I don't mind sharing it with everyone out there. Perhaps if it is working for me and is still healthy (I think it is from all the things I read about eating a balanced diet) that perhaps it'll work for someone else. I will do a new list every week. This week will be from a Sunday to a Sunday only because it would just be silly to start this today and start a new one for tomorrow when it's Monday. Normally I will run them from a Monday to a Sunday.

While writing this out I have decided that since I do keep track of things in the FitDay site that I, for my own benefit of being able to see them weekly, I will be putting in how many calories and fat that day has had and also what percents my calories are broken into for carbs, fats and proteins. With the way I am doing things I am trying to keep my carbs high but high with as much unrefined sugars as I can (even though I still get SOME sweet/salty snacks in) but generally I try to make my carbs at least 60% if not more of my diet and the fats/proteins making up the other 40% or less.

Some things to remember when you read this list
1) each dash represents a different time in the day that I have eaten that group of food.
2) when you see "sandwich" mentioned those are always with whole grain breads that are always very small loaves and thinly sliced because being in Belgium we have fresh bread bakers rather then all the store prepared breads. 3) this is what *I* am doing. I don't mind remarks and all but please remember I am trying my best and do not want to be dumped on. Like everyone I have off days and really good days and I will be open and honest about then as long as I don't always get someone telling me "ooo you shouldn't have eaten that or so much of that"... I already know it :D and if I don't, I'll certainly ask.
4) all those percents you see will always be in the order of carbs, proteins and fats.
5) (yes the last one) I will never mention drinking water in here. Other drinks that I don't normally drink or that have calories in them I will mention. I have for a long time now never had a problem drinking my needed water everyday. I can not drink straight milk and I don't care much for soda/sugared/flavored drinks so all that really is left is water. Yes this part of my lists will be a lot shorter as they go on because people will then be use to what I am doing.

Sunday 21-11 Calories - 1646 Fat - 45grams Percents - 61%/15%/24%
~ 1 bowl Quaker Oat Bran cereal (70grams) with skim milk (170grams). 1 whole medium sized banana.
~ 1 sandwich with 20grams smoked sandwich salmon, 5grams light cream cheese and lettuce. 1 medium sized fresh orange.
~ 15grams Cheeto Puffs (not the hard Cheetos but the light airy things)
~ 700ml's supreme tomato soup (just a normal tomato soup but with chunks of tomatos in it) with some already made mini dumpling made for soups boiled in it (46grams/1 serving). 1 sandwich with 2slices lean chicken breast lunch meat, 5grams margarine and lettuce. 20grams Cheeto Puffs.
~ 20grams orange flavored dark chocolate
~ 20grams Cheeto Puffs. Big glass (I never measure my drinks unless they require a powder or something of the like and then I really only measure the powder or whatever) of diet and caffeine free coke.
~ 1 sandwich with 2slices lean chicken breast lunch meat, 5grams light cream cheese and lettuce. 1 medium sized banana

Today is the day that my husband and I have decided to celebrate our 3rd year wedding anniversary. The actual day is tomorrow the 23rd but I have school for the morning hours and would not be up to making a nice fancy meal as well as a nice cake for it after 4 hours of sitting there through one subject. The reason I am writing this here is for the fact that my food will not show the 5/6 small meals a day because we have been out more today and we're having a special meal tonight. Nothing out of my diet with exception of the cake. When I actually have dinner I will be posting EVERYTHING. I have entered everything I have eaten. I'm proud of myself. My calories were a bit higher but it was a special day and I also do not know how much stuff that small slice of cake and wine added but I did weigh myself in the morning and I still managed to lose another 300grams. It's a lot better then gaining it and even a bit better then staying the same. The amounts below are for everything I have eaten except for the chocolate cake and wine.
Monday 22-11 Calories - 2122 Fat - 29grams Percents - 72%/15%/12%
~ 1 bowl oatmeal crisp apple cinnamon (70grams) with skin milk (180grams). 1 small sized banana.
~ 1 sandwich with 2slices lean chicken breast lunch meat, 5grams light cream cheese, and lettuce. 1 medium sized yellow apple. 20grams Cheeto Puffs. 1 can Lipton Fruit Punch Iced Tea.
~ 1 sandwich with 1slice lean ham, 5gram margarine, yellow mustard and lettuce. 1 small banana.
~ 2 big bowls macaroni pasta with tomato based shrimp dish, 2slices light cheese and zucchini. 1 very small slice chocolate cake with cream cheese frosting. 1 very small glass white wine.

Today I think has gone well. I have been having still some problems with my eyes so my appetite has been controlled a bit but still craved some cheetos. I choose to have a couple pieces of dark chocolate this afternoon rather then a piece of cake. I would have liked both but I am trying to proportion my eating and I am comfortably full with no tummy growlings. I do not NEED to cake and it will be there tomorrow evening when I wish to have a piece... IF I have a piece at all.
Tuesday 23-11 Calories - 1695 Fat - 35grams Percents - 69%/12%/19%
~ 1 bowl Total brown sugar and oat cereal (60grams) with skim milk (180grams). 1 small banana.
~ 1 sandwich with 20grams smoked sandwich salmon, 10grams light cream cheese and lettuce. 1 medium sized pear. 20grams Cheeto Puff.
~ 20grams orange flavored dark chocolate.
~ 80grams pollack fish fried in a spray of olive oil. home made mashed potatoes with milk and spike seasoning. Red cabbage with apples for sweeting.
~ 1 sandwich with 1slice lean ham, 5grams margarine, and lettuce. 1 medium sized pear. 20grams Cheeto Puff.

I woke a bit later today but so far the day has gone very well. I know (over and over again) that I shouldn't weigh myself every day or even every other day but I did and I was pleased. I posted more about it in my daily journal entry. I didn't eat the 5/6 times today that I normally do. I woke much later then I have in the past week, I went for a 2 hour walk (did grocery shopping that was needed but at 3 different stores to get what I needed) and also had stuff around the house to do. I did not feel hunger and the times I did, I had something to eat. Being I did not eat as much as today and my calories/fat were low, I allowed myself to have another piece of the chocolate cake with cream cheese frosting that I made on Monday for my hubby and my wedding anniversary.
Wednesday 24-11 Calories - 1097 Fat - 20grams Percents - 62%/21%/17%
~ 1 sandwich with 20grams smoked sandwich salmon, 5grams light cream cheese and lettuce. 1 small pear. 5grams Cheeto Puffs (measured 20grams but never ate more then the 5 or so yet)
~ 250grams peach-passion fruit yogurt. 15grams Cheeto Puffs (the rest from the earlier part of the day)
~ 85grams lean chicken breast. 1 cup frozen peas microwaved to cook. 1.5 large potatoes mashed with skim milk and 10grams light shredded cheese. 1/2cup home-made mushroom gravy with water, 1 bouillon cube, fresh mushrooms and poultry seasoning.
~ 1 normal sized (portion control... not too big and not a tiny piece either)

Feeling VERY unmotivated today. I just can't seem to wake up and I'm having VERY bad mood swings. I figure this is the part of the diet that I need to fight through. I've stuck to my foods and no binging but I have not been out of the house. I cleaned a bit, did my dishes, played a bit of playstation, watched some TV, wrote/read some on here and now making dinner. Perhaps I over slept (hoping I over slept). It could be the time of my diet where my body goes in to rebel mode. I will get past it... I HAVE to get past it.
Thursday 25-11 Calories - 1439 Fat - 29grams Percents - 60%/21%/19%
~ 1 sandwich with 1slice lean ham, 5grams margarine, yellow mustard, onion, tomato and lettuce. 1 small sized pear. 20grams Cheeto Puffs.
~ 1 sandwich with 15grams smoke sandwich salmon, 5grams light cream cheese and lettuce. 1 medium sized yellow apple. 250grams peach-passion fruit yogurt.
~ 100grams cheese/herb turkey breast. 1.5cups Ebly (kinda a puffed grain type side dish). 1/2cup peas. 1.5cups brussel sprouts cooked in the microwave (I cook most of my evening veggies in the mircrowave.... it saves on fat while cooking and steams them rather then boiling them. You lose a lot of vitamins boiling veggies).
~ 1 large bag of microwaved popcorn.

Well, another friday is upon us. I'm still having some problems with sleep. Went to bed at about 11pm last night and was awake by 4am. I tried to go back to sleep but ended up just getting up. I did get a small nap earlier though so I hope that helps. I have that test today otherwise I wouldn't have taken the nap. My food is ok so far, I really expected it to be worse being how long I have been awake. I managed to get a bit more sleep this morning and then with school this afternoon I managed to stay on calories and even managed to have a good fat day considering the bad night.
Friday 26-11 Calories - 1489 Fat - 22grams Percents - 69%/17%/13%
~ 1 bowl (60grams) Total brown sugar and oats cereal with skim milk (125grams)
~ 1 sandwich with 2slices light cheese slices, 1slice lean ham (warmed on the bread in the microwave) topped with yellow mustard and lettuce. 1 medium sized yellow apple. 1 cup tomato soup from a dry mix. (I do not know the calorie information yet for the soup but come tomorrow when I do my weekly shopping I will grab that information but I figure about 80calories and 2grams fat extra to my day)
~ 1 small bag (50grams) Uncle Ben's mini caramel rice cakes.
~ 100grams pollock fish hand breaded in bread crumbs and dill. 1 cup green beans. 1.5 large potatoes boiled with home-made mushroom/chicken gravy.
~ 1 sandwich with 2slices lean turkey breast, light mayo and lettuce
~ 4 very thin slices fruit cakish type cake (something made here in Belgium that would very closely resemble the American fruit cake)

It's been a good day. I woke again at 10am but this time I slept as much as I needed, not too much and not too little. I get a nice walk with my hubby, managed to FINALLY find some calcium pills (I can handle milk but I do eat cheese, yogurt, and ice cream but limited amounts). They mention to take 6 of them a day (pills of course) but since I do take in some dairy products, I'm going to only take 3. I got a very comfortable nap this afternoon as well. My calories/fat have been great. It's already 11:30pm and I'm still full from our late dinner.
Saturday 27-11 Calories - 1198 Fat - 26grams Percents - 61%/20%/20%
~ 1 bowl oatmeal crisp apple cinnamon cereal (60grams) with skim milk (165grams)
~ 1 sandwich with 2slices lean turkey breast, light herb cream cheese, tomato and lettuce. 2 mandarin oranges. 20grams Cheeto Puffs.
~ (home-made/made-up dish) Home-made mashed potatoes made with skim milk and put on top 2 eggs (over easy), 2slices lean chicken breast lunch meat, chopped onion, slices mushrooms, and 15grams light shredded cheese (this is for each portion of potatoes). Home-made mushroom gravy to put on top.

Managed to go to bed without more food or the want of more food. Woke this morning in a good mood and an hour earlier then the last couple of days. Let's hope the rest of the day goes well. I'll be ever happier if the weather shapes up a bit so I can go walking with the hubby. Calories and fat were a bit higher today but it is sunday after all and I still managed to stay under my max of 2000 calories. This will be my last day posting my food on this message. Look for next week's food in a new message on page 2.
Sunday 28-11 Calories - 1830 Fat - 35grams Percents - 66%/16%/18%
~ 1 bowl Kix's cereal (30grams) with skim milk (140grams). 1 small banana.
~ 1 sandwich (a bit larger bread this time but the same amounts of stuff on it with exception of adding more veggies) with 10grams light herb cream cheese, 2slices lean turkey breast, lettuce and tomato. 1 medium sized pear. 1 medium sized yellow apple.
~ 1 sandwich with 2slices lean turkey breast, light herb cream cheese, lettuce and tomato. 20grams Cheeto Puffs.
~ 1piece (160grams) breaded pollock fish. 1 large potato (cut into thick fry shapes, seasoned with steak seasoning and baked). 1.5cups baby carrots (steamed in the microwave). 6 escargots with garlic butter (most of the butter poured off but garlic eaten). 1 can fruit punch flavored iced tea.
~ 1 home-made banana/raspberry sundae. Made with 1 small banana, 75grams light vanilla ice cream, 1.5 TBS sugar-free and ALL fruit raspberry sauce, 20grams spray can whipped cream and a small sprinkling of nut mix on top of it all. (306 calories, 11grams fat total)

Hello world. Today is the day that my husband and I have decided to really celebrate our 3rd year wedding anniversary. He took off this Monday and Tuesday for it as his present to me. I love having him home to spend time with. We went out earlier and were going to do a whole lot of things that I wanted to do but the buses here are in a complete strike. So we walked to the local gaming store (anything you can think of as far as video games and stations go) and got the copy of Gex 3D that they had put aside for me for our playstation. Was nice to have my walk with him today.... I walk so much longer and WANT to walk so much more when I'm with him and we're not rushed for anything.

Tonight I have a special meal planned with some pasta that will be topped by this frozen dish that he picked out from the store that has all sorts of onions and herbs... best yet it has really nice large shrimp in it. The sauce is tomato based and the only thing added to it is milk (1/3cup) and that is skim to start with. The only thing that won't be on my diet is the chocolate cake we have planned.

I have been doing REALLY well with my diet for the last week and I am feeling proud and even feeling stable enough with my diet that I am allowing myself to enjoy some really bad chocolate cake that I have made from a mix. It will be cut in half, middled with home-made cream cheese frosting, put back together and then glazed with a thin hard chocolate layer. It was bad when we bought it, it was/is going to be worse when we add/ed the ingredients to it that were required anyways and if it already has to have 4 eggs and a 2 sticks butter added to it we figured we'd go all out and break the chocolate up with the frosting in the middle. I am posting this here but I am doing this for ME.... not anyone else seeing as this is my journal. I want to remember the times I have let myself enjoy something... be it a special event (like today) or be it a celebration of me losing so much weight or anything else major in life... I want to know that I have managed to stick to my diet well and allowed/earned having that special something. I want to make sure that it was something that was earned and not just taken, if that makes any sense what so ever.

Yesterday I started to post in the "weigh-in" forum. I posted my starting weight back from the the 15th of this month and then today I posted my weigh-in from this morning. Somewhere I remembered the wrong "big" number of my weight because I need to pay real attention the the ".??" number more being that I weigh-in with kilos not pounds. A kilo equals about 2.2 pounds so we also watch how much the grams are. I remember for some stupid (maybe hopeful?) reason that I was remember 163.5 kilo rather then the 164.5 kilo that it was earlier. It's not a big problem but it is 2 pounds I didn't realize. I will leave my stats the way they are because I am in the beginning of my diet. I always lose the first 10/15 pounds quickly because of cutting my calories/fat so much. I wouldn't be surprised that if by the middle of this week that I'm under 163.5. This morning's weigh-in was 164.1 kilo.

Hey girl. Don't have time to read right now, am rushing to my journal to post in there before I have to get off of here, but wanted to pop in and say Howdy! :wave:

Keep up the great work!!! You are so worth the effort!!!

I'm glad you get a small chance to post a little. It's nice to see someone reading and responding to some of my stuff. How are you doing anyhow? Why do busy?

I was suppose to go to school this morning but for whatever reason I didn't want to and didn't. I am reviewing a course I have already passed but it was almost a year ago so I'm taking it again. The beginning of the course I've done many many times unfortunately. I'm not very good nor having a very good time with the language over here. It's nederlands or dutch as most Americans want to call it (even though dutch is really only spoken in Holland not Belgium). It is probably the closest language to english that you can get without it actually being english. I just don't know why I can't get it. I'm going to have the "end" test come Friday this week to see if I remember enough of the first course to go on to the second one or not. I really hope I still do... repeating this stuff is annoying.

I have gotten to play some playstation but for some reason I'm having problems with my eyes again. I have no idea what it is besides that something is wrong with my glasses before and my eyes haven't readjusted totally yet. Anycase, it isn't totally bad because it helps my appetite but on the other hand I HATE not being able to use my eyes properly. It will pass or I will figure out what/why it is happening.

I was bad and did a weigh in this morning. I know I should really wait at least for a weekly one but I wanted to know even though I was over a bit in calories and had a special dinner if my weight went up or not. I'm glad to say that it was even down another 300grams. I mentioned earlier that I remembered my weight wrong the Sunday before my actual weigh in so my stats were a bit off. I figure tomorrow or thursday I will be at the 360 that my stats say and I hope that come my offiicial weigh-in next Monday I can change them a bit.

The rest of the day has been very uneventful. Played a but more playstation, did up all the dishes from last night, had some cuddle time with hubby for our anniversary and then made dinner.... afterward played a bit on the threads and had my evening sandwich. It's time for dinner and to rest my eyes... sleep well everyone and good luck on whatever it is you are doing.

Hi Missy, I think you are doing great and I'm sure you are already seeing results from your drastic cut in calories. For me, I tend to eat less in people's company but am really bad when I'm alone or with DH ... happy anniversary to you.

I took you up on your invitation to visit your journal. I also added you to yahoo, and am sending you a email this morning. Congrats on your first week. You are doing awesome!

Hugs, Beau :D

Afternoon gal! So how are things on your side of the planet? hehe Starting to feel like winter here. High of about 45 today and mid 30's tomorrow! Just about how I like it.

You spoke about stepping on your scale and I must admit that I am a scale addict. I step on my scale almost every morning. Although I only count the monday am as my official weigh in. I know some people that freek out too much, but it is more of a comfort to me. I'm not patient and calm enough to wait for once a week :o

As for my I'm busy, I work full time at my local city office, then I have a part time job doing cleaning for a low income property mgmt company, and I am involved in my church and am a single parent to a totally awesome and wonderful soon to be 9 year old boy (the joy of my life, can ya tell??) Now, none of that is complaining, because other than my weight I like my life. Well to be totally honest it would be nice to have a spouse at times, but when ever I get the urge I just go spent some time w/ one of my married friends and that fixes that urge...lol

Have a great day!

*smile* I have to admit it's great to see/hear of a man that is taking the charge of a little one instead of the mother. I mean you always here of the "single mother" well what about those few but precious "single fathers"?? I am proud of you for that... keep it up.

I know how you feel about wanting to have a wife (or in my case a husband) I may be only 27 but I had to grow up fast... for many reasons. That also caused me to grow in other ways too and the highest thing I had wishes for was for a loving husband... I have found him and as of today (mentioned before) is our 3rd year wedding anniversary. He is a wonderful man but also 12years older than me. I don't mind because we get along great and we both don't want children. Don't get me wrong... I LOVE kids... I just don't want any of my own... at least not now. He even got "fixed" per say after we got married to make sure we didn't. Besides, make an honest woman out of me :D

About the scale. Yea... I tend to be that way too. I find it more of a comfort then a harm. I know it won't always go down but as I said I weigh in kilos not pounds so it's a TINY bit better for me reading this scale. I go down in grams not pounds so there are 2,200 grams (roughly) per kilo or 2.2 pounds. So my weight-ins tend to at least show a SMALL change rather then waiting for that all so longing pound to change, I get the pleasure here of that all smaller gram :) Not that I'm putting off the pound at all.. heck I grew up with it but it sure does help with the weight lose. I liked the fact that I could see that 300grams down instead of going on it after I ate that small piece of cake to not see a "pound" change. I think that would be too hard if I weighted in as pounds to go on the scale as much as I do. As far as WHY I go on it so much. I too am impatient but also with the readings I get, I can know if the day before if something harmed it or not and if it did too much then I can go back and look at what I had or didn't have and make a change somewhere. I know a weekly one will do that but then I have an ENTIRE week to look back on... just easier this way. So far I haven't denied myself 3 important things in my diet that I love and aren't diet food. SOME dark chocolate (I love some orange flavored dark chocolate that they have out here and is very nicely portioned into small 10gram squares), Cheeto Puffs (I really do love something salty and these offer me all the feeling of eating a lot of them when I'm really not) and fruit punch flavored iced tea (I don't drink much other then water normally and an occasional alcoholic drink so I just need something sugared once and a while). Other then these things I have REALLY cut down my diet.

The first time I started looking into REALLY dieting is when I found diettalk through another "woman's" site. It was here that I found FitDay. I used that on a normal week of not dieting to see what I really took in for calories and fat. I swear I almost passed out at the end of that week's entry. I was taking in over 3500 calories a day and well over 100 if not some days over 200grams of fat a day. Just depending if I went out to eat or not at all that week. If I hit the local McD's then I was certain to go over that 200 mark. It is said that of one's diet to make them heathy as far as fat goes that it was something like not more then 25grams or something close to for woman and 32 or something like that for men. I don't know if these were right but in the beginning I tried to keep my fat to this level. It was almost impossible without cutting out EVERYTHING extra from even frying my meat in a spray of olive oil. So I read more on fat intake.... found a better thought on it that seems to be working for me. Another site said that for a "balanced" diet (not just healthy fat) that your carbs should be 60% your protein and fat each 20% or less if possible. I have tried that this time around and it seems to be working quite well. I also tried to cut out ALL refined sugar except what might be in those 3 items before and my occasional special dinners/events. It is said that whole grains instead of white grains take 1 longer to digest in turn making you feel fuller longer and 2 because of this, gives you energy longer. It seems to be true. I love the way I feel while I'm dieting. I am getting out for walks except in really bad weather (like today) but then I go and find something else to do. With all my activates I have at least been averaging a burn of 1000 calories other then my normal calories burned by simply being awake. I want to increase that and have been trying to do so by walking. I have been thinking that when hubby isn't here, to at least get in some tummy and leg exercises right here in the living room. I even thought about this dancing thing people have mentioned. To just turn some hyper music on and dance around the house. At least your moving and sometimes if it's really good and gets your mood up even more then just moving. Talk about getting your card-workout without knowing it :D

Now see what I've done. I've gone and babbled again :) Sorry.... I do this a lot. Maybe somewhere someone will take to heart what I am doing and think some of it is good and perhaps someone will think it's utter "BS" but I see a "diet" "life change" as something that has to work for YOU, not anyone else. If a diet that is out there works for them but doesn't work for others that is fine....everyone is their own person... inside and outside.

Stay busy and you never answered me if you use that Fitday site at all.... I personally think it's a great site and the one thing I've asked for this Christmas from anyone is my own copy of it for the computer so I don't always have to go online to fill things out and so I can personalize it more then I can online. I'm always here at least once a day... Thank you for being interested :)

Okay, now I really miss those little things beside our names that told our sexes. Cause I guess we had a misunderstanding, cause I'm a single MOM and was talking about a spouse being a HUSBAND.... :o My son's dad has only seen him twice in his 9 years! Only calls about 1 every 2 years or so. Although I have to be fair to him and say that he hasn't called since 2003, but according to his brother last month, he has been in bagdad since March.

I've tried fitday but I don't have alot of patience and it really pisses me off to have to spend so much time searching for stuff so I quit using it. Although I really need to get back to counting calories, I don't have the time or the inkling to spend all my free computer time on fitday!

I keep meaning to issue you an invite and forgetting. I below to a great group of gals in the diet buddy forum, called Awesome Accountables. Honestly, the thread is a bit slow now (hopefully just because of the holiday) but I would love to have you join us over there. We start a new thread every monday am, 1st person there just starts it (I started it this week, hence the typo in the title! :O ) and we just give each other support. Anyway, been meaning to tell you that and kept forgetting.

I'm really bored at work, but suppose I should at least pretent to do more work...hehe

C ya later!

God, I'm SOOO sorry :o Seeing as your *feels embarrassed enough that she feels hot now* ok ok it's in the past... now I KNOW your female. You know I REALLY should look at people's profiles before I go and start in on what sex they are. I might actually get to knowing something someday :). ANYHOW. When I have more free time/IF I have more free time I will take a look at that thread. ATM I'm also in another buddy thread that Beau started.

As for diettalk. I know where your coming from on the finding things crap. The thing I rely most on in that site is adding my own foods. Being I'm in Belgium, we don't have those required by law nutritional labels. I have to put in the information that is on SOME of the stuff I eat. I really have not just cut my calories but stopped buying food all together that DOESN'T offer me the calorie, fat, protein and carbs of it. It's just simpler. Out here it is almost a rule I see that if they do not offer nutritional information on an item... then it's an item you really shouldn't eat cause it's already so bad for you (like chocolates and sweets) :D I'd give FitDay a try again.... it takes a bit but if you make your own food list then it's easy to find the stuff your eating. Like me there are set things I always eat at some point... specially when it comes to my dinner meal. If you really are just calorie counting (like I am but I'm also looking at the other fat, carbs and protein thing) then you really just need 5 pieces of information from those labels. To put your own food into FitDay you need to know the serving size (for your own benefit really), the calories for that serving, the fat, the carbs and the protein. Yes FitDay does offer to keep track of a whole lot of other things like what kinds of fat and such but I can't use that here. They don't break the labels I have up enough. Try it once. After a month of fighting with it then you MIGHT just find your list almost complete except from time to time. Then it's easy and a matter of minutes just to go into your recently added food list and click off the items you have eaten and adjust the serving amounts.

I hope that information made sense and helped. I was really upset with that site the first month I used it too but slowly I kept seeing the list getting easier and easier as it grew to my own personal part. I keep track of my weight there too... it's a wonderful little thing for that cause then you even get a "graph" of your weight lose through different time periods.... 1 week, 2 weeks, a month.... it lets you choose.

Hugs and GET TO WORK :laugh: j/k but don't go getting yourself into trouble now...

I woke later today then normal. I have a problem with anxiety and every few days (unless something is really good or really bad) I take a pill to help mellow me out (prescription of course) and last night I took one of those pills. They do mellow me out but they also have a VERY drowsy effect. They really knock me out but in a tired sleepy way rather then a loopy drugged up way that a lot of other prescriptions do. Waking later is not a problem as long as I don't sleep until noon or something. Today it was nice because I did wake late but it was only 10am. Hubby leaves for work at 7:30am (give or take a few minutes). He wakes at 6:30am but I stay in bed. I mean what can I do besides go and lay on the couch while he sits on the computer trying to wake up... worse yet what do I do while he's taking his morning shower/shave?? Rather just not worry and lay in.... enjoy it while I can before I begin to work.... whenever that is.

Today was the first day after a 4 day weekend that my husband went back to work. He took off Monday and Tuesday for our anniversary. This month has been great I must admit. October 21st is his birthday, November 11th is my birthday and then November 23rd is our wedding anniversary. The first year of being married we lived with his mother and I hate to say this is the one person in my life that I have tried my most to be friends with but she just cares about herself and nothing more.... with exception of how much money she can hord away. Because of this we didn't enjoy out first year married much nor the anniversary because she ruined it. We moved out on our own the November 2003 and had all our stuff moved before it and we loved it. Being alone and not worrying about an annoying, pushy, bratty mother/mother-in-law. This year however was even better. Peter took off long weekends for both our birthdays AND our anniversary. I have to admit I got a bit spoiled having him home all that time but in another way I'm glad he is back to work and I can work on the normal routine of the week. Him gone at work the typical 9-5 type job Monday-Friday which allows me to get to cleaning the house, doing the shopping and gives me time to myself and to work on my diet. It's nice having him home after the day but it is nice to have the time to do what *I* need to for myself while he is gone during the day.

Today has been a great day though. When I woke (like I have most days and I know I shouldn't) and got on the scale. I felt like yesterday was a very good day on my diet and I wanted to see if it made a difference compared to the night before when I had the special dinner for our anniversary. I was so happy when I stepped on it. Earlier in the week I had remembered 1 wrong number of my weight, it was a kilo off and I figured that it was more work to change it that day and have to change it 2 days later so I left it. This morning when I weighed myself I was glad to see that I reached that weight AND passed it by 500grams. I weighed in this morning at 163 and not the 163.5 that I mistook earlier in the week. Now I know someday down the road there are just going to be days that I'm going to go on that scale and there won't be a change and worse yet that there will be days that my weight will even go up. Even go up with me eating well. I'm female.... my hormones are going to play a role at some point but I have to remember that I might go through a week or so of water weight gain but then I also have to remember if I keep going strong through the end of my monthly friend that I will see the weight come off again. Like all, I will feel upset when I see the scale not change or even go up but I will not take it badly. It's part of life and part of losing weight. But I sure am glad that weight came off this week so far. I'm looking forward to my official Monday weigh-in.

Today has been a very busy day not just a good day. It is feeling more and more like fall out but the day was nice, bright and sunny. I came online for a bit, read/wrote a bit, got dressed, made something to eat (was finally hungry by then), eat (even pushed most of my Cheeto Puffs aside until much later in the day), then went out to do shopping. The local Aldi here had a sale item that started yesterday of some little ankle height slipper-sock... you know those things with the little design on the button that is made in rubber or something to help keep you from sliding around the floor. Being these are not a weekly shopping item I made them a reward. I even told my hubby that I would ONLY get them if I walked to the Aldi to get them. So, I hooked up my pedo meter this time with my head phones (I have a pedo meter that has a built in FM radio) and took off. I'm glad to say that I did get my walk done AND more. I walked and got my socks.... began walking to the next store (about a 20 minute walk away) but took the bus from the next stop. This isn't a down fall because it was only 2 bus stops until the store and still had to walk a block because of the closest bus stop being that far from the store. I did the shopping I had to at the next store and then walked back to the bus stop, looked at the time for the next bus and realized I was right in the middle of a 30 minute span of buses.... it was going to be another 20 minutes before the bus came by and I decided it wasn't worth the time to stand there waiting. I walked for MOST of the way back with exception of again 2 bus stops. Once again the closest stop to the last store I had to go to was another block or more away. Off I got again and did my last stop. When I got home I realized I managed to at least walk the entire length of the farthest store one way. I am trying to reach a goal that I can walk the recommended 10,000 steps a day by the 11th of December (my personal 21day challenge) and today I managed to double the amount of steps I have taken at all this past week and a half. It isn't half yet of what I should be doing but it's getting better. I did 4300 steps. I know I really should be wearing my meter every time I'm walking around but I have only been using it when I actually go OUT rather then just around the house as well. I don't do full steps (at least not often) in the house. I am trying though that on good weather days to get out for walk wether or not I have to do anything. On the bad weather days I am vowed to myself to do some heavy cleaning of 1 room a day. Last week it was our spare bed/junk room.

Because of my extra walking today I even burned an extra 500 calories just by walking. I know it isn't much if you think about it but for me it is. I burned close to 1500 calories with all the walking and everyday things I did. I use FitDay for keeping track of things I have done through the day not just food wise but also exercise/moving wise. I have realized I even burn MORE calories (almost double) cleaning my house then I do walking. That is the reason why I vow to heavy clean a room in my apartment on the bad weather days. At least I get to burn some extra calories and am not just sitting around the house with nothing to do.

I've written lots tonight and I best end this. It's going on 11:30pm and I am in need of some serious sleep. I have some threads to catch up on but I'm afraid they will have to wait until tomorrow. Good night to all those out there in DietTalk world and keep up the work..... remember the first step to any kind of addiction, wether it be smoking, drinking, drugs, or even eating is to admit you need help. Goede Nacht Allemaal....

:wave: Hey Missy!

I am glad to hear you enjoyed your 4 day weekend and your anniversary. I lived with my mother in law for three months while we were in-between moves. She is a wonderful woman, but I have to tell you, that it was not easy. I don't think couples are supposed to live with other adults. I believe that all things happen for a reason. Even a bad experience ends up having a good effect somewhere down the line. That is what I would chalk up your experience of living with your Monster-in- law. Now you really appreciate having your own space because you know what it is like not having it. Make sense? A good relationship is a delicate balance of time. It's great you enjoyed your together time. Now enjoy your "you" time.

I will admit I weigh my self all the time. But I do not let fluctuations effect me negatively. I only record or count the weight I get on Sunday mornings.


Congrats on all the walking! I dropped my pedometer in the sink. I have to get another one. So I am without right now. I try to aim for 10,000 steps like you but I wear mine from the moment I get pout of bed till I go back to bed at the end of the day. Every little bit helps! It is not just tracking "steps" but also movement. I find it very motivating.

"Goede Nacht Allemaal" means? Good night _____? See what you have done? Now you are going to have to teach me Flemish! LOL!

LOL.... yea yea yea.... I'm an instigator (sp??). Goede Nacht Allamaal is indeed good night but good night everyone basically. There are some really good sites out there that are even free to learn the language. Wish I knew better how to learn it myself. Perhaps if I did, I'd be working right now and decreasing me and hubby's stress levels. When I'm feeling more awake I will make sure I post you some links I have hidden away in my bookmarks. They even give you samples and such :)

As for the meter. I do know every step counts but being I put in all the house hold stuff and such into FitDay, I just count the steps I do outside. Most likely with as much as I wander my house I probably get close to 10k steps. Dunno. Perhaps someday when I'm in a better mood I will test it out :)

Take care hun and keep those kiddies happy

Hello all out there that are reading. Today has been a very tough day indeed. I woke around 10am this morning which isn't all that bad but I think somewhere along the way I slept too long. I did take another of my pills last night but it was a lot earlier then it was the night before. I just for some reason stayed laying/half sleeping in bed when I should have gotten up at 8ish when my body first told me to. Guess I just enjoyed the warmth and comfort of my blanket and bed more then I thought. I have to get out of that "rut".

I wanted to take a nap all day today but somehow I managed to beat that but on the other hand I didn't go out for the walk I promised myself I would on every sunny day. Perhaps I'm getting to that point in my diet where my body is trying desperately to get me to eat the foods it craves but doesn't need, perhaps my pms time has started or perhaps I just plain and simple over slept. I hope tomorrow will be better for that and all together better.

I have school tomorrow, earlier then normal because I'm going to be taking the end test again to see if I know of the first level to go onto the 2nd level of the Nederlands language. I have already passed the level 1 but that was a year ago and I somehow figure I'll pass the first part of it but not the second part of it. LONG story of how this has happened and perhaps sometime down the road I'll tell it if the subject arises.

Not much else going on today. I did manage to fight off binging and most cravings. I had my normal allowed 20grams of Cheeto Puffs and even had my hubby finish off the other 2 small pieces of cake that were left from Monday just so I wouldn't eat one tonight or any other night coming the next week. I did have a big bag of microwave popcorn but only in the end of the evening when I knew I wouldn't be eating any more food. My calories, fat and percents allowed me to have it so I let myself. Popcorn is good for you, yes air-popped and such is better but microwave if you work it in isn't bad either.

Earlier today I was looking through the threads and came across one with a link to site that offered a free ebook about dieting and such. I'm only a couple pages into it because of my eye sight (another story for later) but in those couple of pages he mentioned 2 things that made me think. The first of these things was that the secret to any kind of habit is "It takes 21days to form a habit" and gave an example of you sitting at a desk with a trash can on the right and if you moved it to the left that it would take you 21days until you were throwing your trash to the left instead of the right (I might have the directions wrong but you get the idea). This comment alone made me think back to the other times I've dieted. I had ALWAYS failed at it come the beginning of the 3rd week into it. That right there made me determined to stay on it through the 3rd week. If I can then perhaps I can get into a habit of eating right :). Another thing that was mentioned was that it takes almost 2 weeks before your body really goes into "withdrawl" and that might have been another reason for me failing come that 3rd week. With those 2 thoughts in my head I WILL and HAVE to continue through the 3rd week. If I can, perhaps I can have some success in my losing weight.

I have a dream.... In a couple years when I make it back to the States to visit family/friends (remember mother is going to try to come here next year so it'll be at least a year and a half if not more before I can get back to visit) and not having told anyone but my mother/father. To show up and start to visit with these people and to look closely at them to see their reactions to me being thin or at least a lot thinner then I was when they last saw me. The biggest thing I want to do is show up to see my oldest sister without telling her that I was losing weight. She use to be very pretty when she was younger... even through her graduation. After, I have no idea what went wrong but she had gained and gained and gained. She's about 5'4 or so and weighs more then I do. I have tried to get her to diet with me and such but she just doesn't seem to have the mental power to do so. I fear for her life. I hope that if she really is looking to me as her "big sister" now that I can show her things can be done and that will kick her to do it herself. If not, at least I can enjoy her reaction to seeing the "new" me.

It's late again... going on 11pm (I really should go to bed earlier on the nights my hubby works the next day) and I'm very sleepy now. Especially with avoiding that nap my body wanted so badly today. I will end my post and wish everyone luck and happy thoughts through their days. Goede Nacht een slaap well, allamaal.

I ended up having a bad/weird night. The day before I slept too long I think and that also ended up in me going through the day very tired feeling and going to bed at 11pm. This isn't a bad time to go to bed, at all. But being I got too much sleep that morning, my body already didn't need really more sleep. So in turn I ended up waking around 4am. I tried not to bother my hubby too much but ended up waking him anyhow. He got back to sleep though, thank goodness. He wakes every weekday at 6:30am for work. After he left, I did manage to get some more sleep though. Not much but a bit. I thought that being I was awake at 4am that my food was going to be much worse being that I would be awake for so much longer. I'm glad I got more sleep. My calories and fat today have been great.

I have had more energy today but still not as much as I had earlier in the week. I hope that'll change again. I have been doing the "weigh myself everyday" thing but it's not harming me. If anything I think it's going to help me later on in my diet. I haven't had a change in the last 2 mornings but I haven't gained anything either. I still think I started on the psm part of my month and if I can keep strong through the whole thing, I'm sure I'll see a nice change when I lose water again (hopes).

Tomorrow is weekend finally. I've made it ANOTHER week on my diet. I have the weekend to go yet before it is offically 2weeks. I do allow myself more calories on the weekend but nothing off my diet. Tomorrow I'm going to try a new recipe I found.... well more an idea I found. It makes the suggestion of replacing egg in an omelet with potato. Mash up cooked potatoes, fry them like you would an omelet and add all the things you would normally to an omelet. Just no egg and a lot less fat. I'm going to add 1 egg in the middle of the whole thing though being that it is weekend. I have fresh mushrooms and onion in the house and I will have to see what the mood brings as to what I add for flavoring.

I did the majority of our grocery shopping tonight. I realized when I looked at my information on FitDay that I forgot to get the information off the dry soup while I was there. I do remember vaguely that the calories were under 100 and the fat was under 3 (from counting it in the past) but I will make a point of going to look at it tomorrow. My calories and fat though even with that are good today.

Tomorrow I hope that Peter will take me out to the local mall. They have a "natural" store there. Nothing that needs to be refrigerated but all the good for you natural/nature stuff. I'm going in search of barley, sesame seeds and really just to take a better look around while I have the time. I want to make my own version of "beef barley soup" but since my hubby and I don't eat red meat, I am going to try it with shredded turkey breast instead of beef. The seeds though are because a while ago (I think I even posted it in the recipe forums a while ago) I made a veggie mix with shredded carrots, onions, peppers and such... some crab and mini salad shrimp... then topped it off with a low fat sesame sauce from the States. Once again, I can't get those products out here and I don't want to count on anyone from the States sending me them so I want to learn to make my own. There are sauces out here but aggggain, they don't count on the light/low-fat/low calorie thing here yet so the sauces are usually full of bad things.

It's now going on 11:30pm and I am starting to have problems with my eyes. At least it's taking longer now. I will say good night and wish everyone the best of luck. May your day be happy and bright and your nights mmmmm also be happy :D

Hello world. I'm feeling good today. I did wake up at 10am again but this time it was with the right amount of sleep. Not too much and not too little. While I was sleeping in this morning, my husband did the dishes for me. It is so nice when he does little things like that. I just wish he'd wake up a little more when it comes to those things. Dishes are nice but I sure would like to be curled up to as I was waking rather then have the dishes done sometimes.

Peter and I got a nice 3 hour outing today. We went to that nature store I mentioned yesterday but they are more natural stuff for the body rather then stuff like grains. They gave me another store and directions but when we went there it was closed. Always closed on weekends. I think this is the worst time for a store to close. Saturdays are the days that everyone is out. Perhaps next week I will go again and check it out. I wish more that Peter could be with me because he speaks the language here better and can explain the items I want to the person/s at the store. I will see how the weather turns out the coming week. It's been ok so far but it is getting colder. I want the barley for soup so it isn't THAT vital yet.

It was a very nice day for me. It proved to be very relaxing and very nice. A long walk with the hubby, no dishes until the evening after dinner (which could have been done tomorrow but I did them tonight), got to take a nice nap on the couch while hubby sat not too far away playing a game on his computer and then to top it all off I have no had any real problems with food or cravings. It's is 12am here (midnight) and I'm still feeling comfortable from dinner which was almost 4 hours ago now. I hope I won't be up too much longer. If I'm not that means the amounts I put in for today will stay and I will have felt good.

I did finally, after almost a year looking, found a pill for just calcium but also with vitamin D in it (they work together). I had been looking for something in just calcium form for a while now out here. I can not handle the amounts of dairy each day to get enough calcium every day. These pills say to take 6 a day (3 in the morning and 3 at night). I do take in SOME dairy everyday, even if it's just my milk in the morning. There are days that I have yogurt, cheese and even some low-fat ice cream. I think the 3 will be more then enough with the foods I eat. I'm going to post the question on the personal dietitian forum though and see what other's think.

The last few days I have been still weighing myself but for a couple of days the scale showed no gain and no lose. This morning I weighed myself as usual and it showed a 400gram lose. That felt good. I think that made the difference in me wanting to get my walk. I know it won't change everyday and I know there are still going to be times when it goes back up but I also know that if I keep working hard on it then I WILL get to my goal weight in the end.

There isn't really much else to write about. I'm still feeling really good but wide awake from my nap before but I'm sure in the next hour or so that I will be feeling sleepy again and go to bed. If I do start feeling hungry though before I get to being tired then I will have a sandwich or something. I won't let myself go hungry just because of my calories or fat being good. They will still be good even if I do get more to eat, just not as low. Good night everyone and keep going. In the end... it isn't just me that can make it to my ultimate goal... but ALL of us!

Hi Missy, looks like you are doing great. How did you meet yr husband?

*smile* of all places... the internet. We use to play games called M.U.D's (Multi User Dungeons). Kind of like Dungeons and Dragons but text based and people from all over the world can log in.

It was definetally a "true love" story. I told him he had to come to me if he wanted to meet and to my complete surprise, he came to me a few months later for a week. From there on we knew we had to be together and I didn't have much left in the States besides my mother so I agreed to move here. Been 3years Sept 2001 living here and 3years Nov. 23rd 2001 being married. And ya know.... I wouldn't change a thing with exception of me working.

So how are you doing over all China? I see you every so often make your rounds :)

Hi Missy, it's definitely a love story. Isn't it weird that for some people, they date for long period of time not knowing if each other is right for them but for others, they just knew. It's the same for my case too ... I knew early that I was going to marry DH. I believe that if it's meant to be, you would know right away. I have friends who knew very early in their relationships and they had a short courtship before getting married. How long after you met did you get married?

Dietwise, not so good. Sometimes I eat ok (esp when I'm around people, like in the office) but I usually do badly at night. :( Everyday is a challenge!

:hug: I know how you feel about doing bad at night. That is where I have it hardest too. No matter what I eat during the day, I always have cravings in the evening or at least the "munchies". It's easy to say no around other people and to "show" off but then when one gets home and it's just you or you and hubby you tend to let go a bit. I've been trying to curve this by allowing myself at least 2 hours after dinner before I eat something. Keeping in mind that there is NO possible way that I'm actually hungry before 2 hours after a full dinner. If I am then feeling hungry, I go for my sandwiches... lots of veggies, some light cream cheese or something and a piece of lean lunch meat. If I'm staying up late and I'm again feeling hungry or having that craving feeling, then I allow myself (just a serving) of whatever it is I'm craving at the time.

If you look on the first page of my journal, you will see a longer post with colors in it. This is the message I am always updating (at least until today is over, then I start a new one for the week) with what I've been eating and marking when I eaten at different times. You'll see I still have sweetened iced tea, cheeto puffs and even chocolate and I'm still going strong on calories/fat. I record everything in FitDay. I did wonder though how FitDay yesterday got a 61%, a 20% and another 20%.... quick math tells me that is 101% :shrug: . Anycase, it seems to be working. I'm not gaining, I'm feeling full of energy and yes I still have my off days and I look forward to continuing.

Today I have plans of making home-made soft pretzels. I made my first attempt at home-made cinnamon rolls before my diet which required me to play around with yeast for the first time in my life and they came out pretty good. That gives me some hope that the pretzels will work too. I'm going to make a few with rock salt on them and a few sweet with cinnamon/sugar on them for dessert.

Hope some of these ideas will help :) Take a look at my weeks food and see if it might be something you can stick to at night. If you notice I even still have a FULL dinner at night. Keep up the work.... I know you can do it!!

Hi Missy, thanks for directing me to where you post yr menu. I was starting to wonder what do you eat daily. I used to eat cereals for a while when I started my weight loss journey but I realised that I prefer eating something warm in the morning and not sweet. I don't have a sweet tooth, thus preferring savoury food. What I do need to work on is to consume less sodium which will be challenging for me. We have bakery shops here too and they make different kinds of bread. I try not to eat too much bread either. No fast food except some KFC popcorn chicken occasionally. Somehow I can resist eating fast food .. but I noticed that whenever I finished eating a burger, it feels as if I haven't eaten it yet so I seldom eat burgers. That's great that you always write so much abt what's going on in your life. Keep up the good job. Pls tell us more abt your husband.

As with most Sundays, today has been very uneventful and even fairly relaxed. I had hoped the weather was going to clear up a bit but it never did. That's ok, I still got to burn a lot of calories just by doing stuff around the house.

I do use FitDay for keeping track of my diet stuff like calories and exercise but I do wonder now a day if their calorie counting of activities is correct. I went looking for calories burned last night on goggle and found a "calculator" of sorts for this with a whole list of exercises. I picked walking at 25mph, put in my weight the first time and it read almost 3x's as much calories burned as the Fitday showed and then I also did my husband's weight and it again showed more then *I* even burned. I will have to email them about this I think. Being this is my journal I'm going to get a bit more personal. I even checked on sexual activities because according to FitDay I burned LESS calories with 1 hour of well intercourse type sexual activates then I did with 20mins of the activity of "brushing teeth, brushing hair and the like". I saw something really wrong with that :) I don't work a sweat up brushing my hair and teeth.

There really isn't much else to say today. The day's calories/fat were a bit higher then normal but it's also a Sunday. I still stayed under my set max of 2000 calories so I'm feeling ok about it. I hope tomorrow morning when I do my official weigh in that the scale will be kind. Until tomorrow everyone.

Some things to remember when you read this list
1) each dash represents a different time in the day that I have eaten that group of food.
2) when you see "sandwich" mentioned those are always with whole grain breads that are always very small loaves and thinly sliced because being in Belgium we have fresh bread bakers rather then all the store prepared breads. 3) this is what *I* am doing. I don't mind remarks and all but please remember I am trying my best and do not want to be dumped on. Like everyone I have off days and really good days and I will be open and honest about then as long as I don't always get someone telling me "ooo you shouldn't have eaten that or so much of that"... I already know it and if I don't, I'll certainly ask.
4) all those percents you see will always be in the order of carbs, proteins and fats.
5) (yes the last one) I will never mention drinking water in here. Other drinks that I don't normally drink or that have calories in them I will mention. I have for a long time now never had a problem drinking my needed water everyday. I can not drink straight milk and I don't care much for soda/sugared/flavored drinks so all that really is left is water. Yes this part of my lists will be a lot shorter as they go on because people will then be use to what I am doing.

Here it is.... the start of week 2 of keeping track of my foods and start of week 3 of my dieting. I'm still going strong and feeling quite good. The weather sucks but that is normal for Belgium this time of year. I had my weekly Monday weigh-in and I'm proud of it.
Monday 29-11 Calories - 1581 Fat - 29grams Percents - 63%/19%/18%
~ 1 bowl (60grams) Total brown sugar and oats cereal with skim milk (165grams). 1 small banana
~ 2sandwiches (smaller then my normal ones because I ended up with the last few slices of the loaf) with 4slices lean chicken breast, 15grams light herb cream cheese and lettuce. 1 small pear. 20grams Cheeto Puffs.
~ 1 chicken sausage (120grams). 1/2cup corn. 1 large white potato (made into oven baked fries).
~ 2 small mandarin oranges. 1 large cup hot green tea with jasmin.
~ 5pieces (40grams) Orangettes (those dark chocolate covered orange flavored gel type sticks)

Well it was nice most of the morning hours while I was at school at least. I got out for the day even if it was only to school and back. Now that I have decided to go get an extra walk the weather changes on me. It's now over cast and no sun in sight. Normal for Belgium I suppose.
Tuesday 30-11 Calories - 1620 Fat - 23grams Percents - 68%/19%/13%
~ 1 bowl Quaker oat bran cereal (57grams) with skim milk (150grams). 1 small banana. 200grams raspberry yogurt drink.
~ 1 sandwich (added an extra slice of bread to my FitDay because the bread this time around is a bit bigger than normal being it's from the middle of the loaf) with 2slices lean chicken breast, 10gram light herb cream cheese, lettuce, onion, and tomato. 1 small pear. 2 small fresh mandarins.
~ 1 large cup of mint flavored hot chocolate but with only half a packet of the coco mix. 4thin slices fruit cakish type cake (mentioned before on last weeks food)

The weather is looking like pure and utter rubbish. I can't tell if it's suppose to be 11am or 5pm because it's so over cast. Today I will clean one of our rooms from top to bottom to get my extra exercise in for the day. Going to make some dessert tonight. It's a sugar-free/low-fat box thing my mother sent me. I wanted a bit too long to eat my lunch so I took an extra pear with it.
Wednesday 1-12 Calories - 1642 Fat - 25grams Percents - 69%/17%/14%
~ 1 bowl Quaker squares (65grams) with skim milk (160grams). 200grams raspberry yogurt drink.
~ 1 sandwich (counted again on FitDay as 3 slices bread) with 1slice lean ham, 15grams light herb cream cheese, onion, tomato and lettuce. 2 small pears.
~ 100grams spicy honey turkey breast. 1.5cups green beans (steamed in the microwave). 1cup white rice (normally would do brown rice but the white rice is what is left in the house)
~ 3 small mandarin oranges
~ 1 portion dessert (this plain cheese cake flavored moose that is sugar-free and fat free made from a powder that my mother sent me a while ago, then placed on top of some mashed up cinnamon graham cracker crumbs) Topped with 1 TBS sugar-free raspberry sauce.

It's a very sunny day out today. I do have school but I also hope to get a walk in sometime other then that. I feel I've been doing really well these last few weeks and I'm glad to see the scale moving. It lets me know that I have to be doing something right for a change. My cravings aren't NEARLY as intense anymore and I'm not feeling hungry all the time. I so far managed to keep my calories/fat under the maximum amount I've set for myself each and every day since I started my diet.
Thursday 2-12 Calories - 1514 Fat - 23grams Percents - 68%/18%/14%
~ 1 bowl Quaker squares (65grams) with skim milk (160grams). 1 small banana. 175grams raspberry yogurt drink.
~ 1 sandwich (normal sized today) with 20grams smoked sandwich salmon, 10grams light cream cheese and lettuce. 1 small pear. 20grams Cheeto Puffs.
~ 100grams lean chicken breast fried in worcestershire sauce. 2cups brussel sprouts (again steamed in the microwave). 1 large potato, peeled and boiled.
~ 1 sandwich with 20grams smoked sandwich salmon, 10grams light cream cheese and lettuce. 2 small mandarin oranges.

It's cold this morning. I'm not looking forward to school this afternoon if the sun doesn't start to shine. I've still been weighing myself everyday and all but today I have been seeing a loss. This mornings weight was 161.2 kilo and yesterdays was 160.7. This is ok for now because I know there are "days" where it will do this. More water taken in and such as well as a bunch of other factors. I only do an official weigh in on Mondays. Keeping track of this all on FitDay is great... it even gives me a report of "am I burning the calories I'm taking in?" As long as this is burning more, I know I'll be losing weight. When it start becoming not such a distance between what I take in and what I burn, then I know my weight loss will slow down. This is one program I am thinking about buying personally.
Friday 3-12 Calories - 1598 Fat - 27grams Percents - 70%/14%/15%
~ 1 sandwich with 20grams smoked sandwich salmon, 10grams light cream cheese and lettuce. 2 small pears.
~ 28grams Cheeto Puffs (end of bag and nibbled on throughout the morning hours)
~ 1 bowl (30grams) Kix's Cereal with 130grams skim milk. 1 small sized banana.
~ 80grams breaded pollock with 10grams light tartar sauce. 1.5 large potatoes, peeled and boiled. 1cup peas (microwaved)
~ 1 sandwich with 30grams smoked sandwich salmon, 10grams light cream cheese and lettuce. 1 medium sized banana. 1 can fruit punch flavored iced tea.

It's very foggy today. It's 11am already and there is still foggy. I can just imagine what the night was like. I was going to look but never got around to it. Has anyone noticed the more you think about remembering something, the more you forget it... even compared to the times you HARDLY think about that thing and remember to do it :D We're really short on stuff like sandwich fixing because I planned just enough up until today. Even ran out of milk last night because Peter has been taking cereal during the mornings as well. It is definitely grocery shopping day. Today is also pasta day. Every so often (every couple of weeks) I allow for a big bowl of pasta to be made with healthy stuff in it but as much as peter and I can comfortably eat. Tonight was with veggies and no meat, tomato sauce and a bit of cream cheese type sauce make it like a cream tomato sauce. Was pretty good. My list is a bit weird today compared to other days because hubby and I were out for almost 5 hours this afternoon with just wandering the city and our weekly shopping.
Saturday 4-12 Calories - 2157 Fat - 42grams Percents - 68%/15%/18%
~ 1 sandwich with 2slice lean chicken breast flavored with fine herbs, 10grams cream cheese and tomato. 1 medium sized banana. 20grams Cheeto Puffs.
~ 3 "soup dishes" (no not bowls but those deeper dishes that look still like plates) of pasta with veggies and cream tomato sauce.
~ 1 baked sweet.... square with whipped cream in the middle, a flaky pastry on the outside and just a VERY light coating of powdered sugar on the top.
~ 1 very small sized pear. 1 medium sized mandarin. 1 small banana (feeling hungry and need to make up missed fruit for the day)
~ 2 bite sized Kinder Hazelnut chocolates (5grams)

This is the lazy day to enter for this post. As usual, I will make a new post for next week. Here is is though the end of week 2 of keeping track of what I'm eating. It's going well. Out of the something like 17days total I've been keeping track... there were only 2 days that I went over my 2000 calorie mark and 1 day that I went over my 40gram of fat mark. This is only a personal maximum though.
Sunday 5-12 Calories - 2156 Fat - 51grams Percents - 62%/17%/21%
~ 1 bowl (70grams) Styleese Cereal (store brand of something like Special K) with skim milk (160grams). 1 small sized banana.
~ 200 grams green seedless grapes.
~ 1 sandwich with 2slice lean chicken breast, 10grams light herb cream cheese, lettuce, tomato, and onion. 2 very small sized pears. 1 medium mandarins (feeling quite hungry this afternoon).
~ 20grams Cheeto Puffs. 4 "bite sized" Kinder chocolates. (could have taken more fruit or something but really needed something "bad")
~ 1.5 large potatoes, mashed with some milk, mushrooms and spike seasoning. 3 small eggs, 2 light cheese slices, 50grams smoke sandwich salmon (all put on top of the potatoes). 1 can fruit punch iced tea.
~ 1/2 cup (300grams) Cecemel (a imitation chocolate milk)

Today is start of week 3. I've been officially dieting for 3weeks today. I have been keeping track of my food for a bit over a week and it seems to be really helping me. I looked over my past week and a couple days and have amazed myself that I have not had a SINGLE day where my calories ever exceeded my maximum limit of 2000 calories and my fat compared to what I use to take in is outstanding. I still get my little sweets and drinks but I now look at them as something I have in portions but also as something I have the rest of my life to enjoy. These last couple if weeks have really made me realize how good food that is bad for you tastes. It makes me glad that I let myself go through the days without the munchies and sweets I'd took in almost daily and then allow myself that 20grams of Cheetos or that 1 can of sweetened iced tea.

I'm feeling quite good, I have a lot more energy then I did when I ate bad, my tummy aches that I went to bed with almost every night are practically gone and my moods are almost always in the good. I notice even with the slight lose of weight I have already begun to lose, that my clothes are already fitting better. I had a shirt that I wore from time to time that did fit but I always looked like I had a very puggy upper tummy in it. Today I wore it and felt as though it didn't "hug" my tummy so much. I notice the most of the "look" in my fingers, hands and lower arms so far. I want to continue seeing these changes.

I had my weekly Monday weigh-in today. I noted it in the "weigh-in" forum. http://www.diettalk.com/forums/showthread.php?p=471279#post471279
It really does make me think when I put that weekly post of my weight. I was getting a bit frustrated this week because I hardly ever saw the scale move. I am one of those people that weigh themselves almost every morning. I also kept having to remind myself on days I didn't see a change that at least it wasn't a gain. It wasn't a lose either but it's better then seeing a 400grams gain. It seemed (or at least thought to myself all week) that I would be lucky to lose 1kilo (2.2pounds) out of the whole week but come today, I was glad when I got to mark down on my weekly weigh-in this Monday that I manage to lose another 2kilo (4.4pounds) through the week. If this keeps up I will be very happy. I will be happy even if that much a week doesn't drop itself because I know in my heart and in what I write that I AM working on my diet and that just because one week doesn't show a different, doesn't mean that the next week won't show twice as much as any other week. It sure does feel good in the end of the week to know though that I did lose more then I figured I was going to.

It's now going on 12 midnight again. I should have been in bed with hubby almost 30 minutes ago but I needed to write in my journal. If I don't, that just starts the cycle of not coming here every day to post. I don't know if my posts will always be this long but I will be here every day to post something, even if it was just a simple "uneventful day" but more times then not, I will post a lot more. I love talking/typing and my journal is the best place to do it.

For now, I will end and head to bed. I don't want hubby waiting so long that he doesn't get his sleep that is needed for work tomorrow. It's a long week of work (5days) and will be this way until the day before Christmas. This isn't ALL that bad because it at least lets me work on my diet without having to worry about if he's on the same eating schedule as I am with exception of our dinner which I can manage. So, goodnight all and remember, you can do it if you just put your mind and heart into it.

Good evening all. Today has been a fairly uneventful day. Really not much to write about. The weather for most of the morning hours was very nice and very sunny but then come around 1-2pm it turned to be quite cloudy out. With being up early yesterday for school, cleaning up the house and all the other things that come with a weekday I'm already very tired. Means this entry will be short compared to most of mine. Tomorrow I'm sure I'll be writing more.

I am managing to ignore it and figure I will succeed in it because it's almost time to go get some sleep but I've been feeling VERY munchy tonight. Not hungry nor actually craving anything.... just munchy. Hubby is that way tonight too and I'm proud of him. Normally he'd give in and go get something more to eat but he resisted the urge too. He isn't in that "unhealthy" over weight but he can stand and wants to lose about 20pounds yet (10kilo). He looks good in my eyes but I have to admit I'd like to see the well defined chest he has already become more showing then his normal typical male tummy that is right now :). In the end we'll both get there. He too is losing weight with the way I've been doing dinners and evening munchies.

I have found it easier to make a normal portioned dinner with meat, veggies and some sort of starch (potatoes mostly but other things like pasta, rice or other grain type side dishes so far) and then waiting a couple hours and having something for dessert or even having another sandwich (main part of my diet right now). This way I still have something to eat between those hours of dinner being done (around 6pm) and bed time which isn't until as late as 11pm on work nights and even a lot later on weekend nights.

That is all for tonight. I really need some sleep. I want to try to work on hubby and my web pages some more tomorrow as well as getting to cleaning up my hard drive a bit more (started that tonight too but just too tired to continue). Means I need a good nights sleep. There isn't any school tomorrow, never is on Wednesdays, so it will give me the day to get some of this stuff done. Hugs everyone and sleep well when you get there. Keep it up and going.... you can ALL do it.

P.S. If John reads this at all..... thanks for making it possible to add attachments to the recipe forum.

The weather has been semi poor today. If you didn't have a clock this morning you wouldn't have been able to tell if it were 10am or 4pm due to the clouds. It didn't rain very much but it did not let the sun out very often either. I hope tomorrow is better, I have school again.

I spent most of the day today cleaning up my hard drive, going through desktop pictures that I've collected but never cleared out, cleaning up folder upon folder that I've collected/made in the last half year, and even went through and put home pictures into folders that they belong. After deleting all the stuff I didn't want, I ended up with almost another 3gig (ALMOST 4gig) of space free. I think I need to clean my drive a LITTLE more often.

I made dessert for tonight. There is a box mix (just a powder) that is low-fat and sugar-free that my mother had sent me a while ago. It is plain cheese-cake flavored and goes very nicely over some graham crackers mashed up. I've had it before and it went really well with some of my sugar-free raspberry sauce over it all.

I've taken a look at my food the last 2weeks that I've been keeping track and also took a look on FitDay at all of it. I realized the entire time I've been doing my diet this time that I have only gone over the 2000 calories on one day and never gone over the 40grams fat maximum that I've set for myself on any day.... including the special meal days of my anniversary and birthdays. I'm proud of that. I continue to see the scale move almost daily and that makes me even happier. I don't update my stats until the Monday of each week but I have been updating my ticker. I like to see something move as I weigh myself. I do know that come later in my diet (perhaps even sooner then later) that I will not see a weight change every day but at least if I do well I may see a lose every week. Only time will tell.

We had a small crisis tonight. Every so often (specially on the days that I have a lot of dishes, hubby has taken a long shower and I have taken a shower all in the same day) I have to turn the water heater for the apartment on during the day (it normally heats our water in the night when the electric prices are cheaper). I did that today. Later in the evening I went to turn it off and found water all over our fuse boxes. At first we thought it was condensation but then realized it was dripping from a small hole where the plastic electrical pipes go into the ceiling from the fuse box. We got a hold of the landlord (who runs the fresh fish shop down stairs) and he found out that it was the upstairs apartment with a water problem. They went to replace the faucet in their bathtub and messed up the water-tight seal on it which in turn made a leak and a pooling of water in the wall. I was even so much that it was making the wall in the hallway wet. The landlord will have his uncle who is a plumber in tomorrow to fix it.

We settled down after that little fright and enjoyed our dessert. This time I made this moose stuff with just crushed up graham crackers but normally I'd do it with a graham cracker crust... you know slightly sugared and a bit of butter to put it all together into a crust type thing. I think it works better this way. Will have to remember that for next time. It isn't had this time but wasn't feeling like a "dessert" but rather a "diet" thing, if that makes any sense.

Tomorrow besides school, I hope to work on my hubby and my web page some more. Not sure if it'll happen because I don't know if the plumber will be down here at all or not. Guess tomorrow will tell.

For tonight though I will say good night. It's going past 11pm as usual and I'm tired and so is Peter. I hope the weather is better tomorrow. Good night world. Until tomorrow's entry.

Hello all. It's again another fine day in Belgium. The weather is still coolish (normal for this time of year) but the sun is out in full force. First time I've had to wear my sunglasses in almost 2weeks. I love it when it's this bright out. I can't wait until the spring comes again and it's warmer weather. I'll be out walking all the time if I have my way.

I'm feeling good. My unofficial weigh in this morning was at 160.7 and that felt good. To see another number drop off the scale besides the .?? number. I know seeing a loss everyday won't keep happening. I know that sometimes it'll stay the same and sometimes it'll even go up a few 100grams. That is ok... it's part of the diet. If I start to see kilo's go on again, then I worry and start looking at my diet more closely. For now it's all good though :D

Last night while I was filling my weekly pill box, I noticed that the pills that I take for my heart palpitations are expired. Not a BIG date or anything but they expired the month of November. I took them back to the drug store that I got them from and sure enough, even the box she had in stock was expired. I was lucky today... this is her normal closed day (every Thursday) and I happened to be able to catch her while at home. A lot of store owner's live above their place of work. I wouldn't normally of bothered her (specially since it was a drug store farther away from home due to the fact that our doctor is there and it wasn't just stuff for me that we needed that time) but with the fact of how tight money is right now and that there was over a half of a box left, it was silly just to throw them away and get a new box. She was happy I pointed this out to her and was sorry for the trouble. She'll replace them tomorrow. I have school tomorrow afternoon so hubby is going to be kind enough to stop by after work and grab them for me. He works just a couple blocks away from there now.

On my way walking from the bus stop to the drug store though, I was feeling very happy until I walked past what I thought was a cat basking in the sunshine. :( He/She wasn't basking, it had passed away :( It couldn't have been long because it was still warm and soft (yes I nudged it but with my foot). I hate to see animals that have passed on... especially kitties. I don't know what happened or anything but it was laying between the sidewalk and an open gate... and it didn't look like it was hit by a car or anything but *shrug* who knows. It really did upset me though. There seem to be a lot of stray cats around here and if not stray then ones that are allowed to come and go as they please from their owners (open door policy thing I guess). It's not anything you'd see from where I come from. They have completely different rules about dogs/cats here. Dogs are allowed in almost any place with exception of restaurants and the like. Buses, malls, grocery stores (as long as they small and can fit in the cart).... they are allowed. The first time I saw someone get on the bus with a dog, I even asked hubby if that was allowed. He looked at me like I was nuts for even asking :D . Cats on the other hand seem to have the run of land so to speak. I see them all over and you never know if they are strays or if they belong to someone and are just out for the day. I've gotten use to it though. I just hope this won't be a problem for when my mother comes to visit for the holidays next year. She's severely allergic to animals. Will be something I suppose she'll have to ask her doctor about.... perhaps get some kind of temporary help for it or something.

I am proud though... I did get an extra walk in today even though I had school. The drug store is more then 20minutes walk for me from the closest bus stop and then I even took the longest of two ways to a bus stop to get home (another 30mins walk). I feel good about this and I feel better when I get out for walks. The only problem I have is that it isn't I CAN'T walk for long periods or anything but I get bored. Music and thoughts help but they don't do it for just going for a walk. Hubby going with me helps A LOT but he works all day and I hate to ask him for walks after work, when it's getting colder and when it's completely dark out already. He gets home before 6pm but now a days it is completely dark before he even gets here.

I've noticed tonight, I believe due to the fact that I am eating well/balanced, that my skin has been clearing up. I use to have a problem (not sever or anything) with pimples on my face and some on my back. Now a days I have one spot and that is due to the fact that I managed to catch my upper cheek with my glasses while putting them on at night. Otherwise there isn't a red spot to be seen. This makes me happy. I hope if I can continue up the work on eating well that it will mean the end to my bad skin. I normally have that "baby soft" skin that everyone wishes they had.... all except for my face mostly. *crosses fingers* Here is hoping.

I've decided that while I'm doing this whole "life transformation" that I was also going to let the rest of my hair grow out. When I was living in the States, I worked a lot in fast food chains. My last job (and the best job I have had so far) was doing delivery for Pizza Hut. Like most fast food places though in American, you are required to wear an almost baseball cap type hats. You know the kind that have a brim in front and an adjustable plastic piece in the back. Yep, you guessed it.... so did Pizza Hut. I found 2 problems with this. 1) It got WAY too warm, especially in the summers and 2) I always had to put my hair up in a pony tail to make it look good. I decided that it was best that if I still wanted my long hair in back, that it looked ok to have the top/sides short. I've had this haircut for ages now and thought that with my new change here in life, that this was the time to see if I can grow it all out again. I use to love styling it when I was younger and still in school (does anyone remember that phase with hair spraying the "bangs" into like a big poof in the middle or side of your forehead??) Yep.... I use to do that too.... it was fashion after all. Not that I'm going to do that now a days but I would love to wear hairbands and such again.... perhaps barrettes even.

I've been on this hot tea phase for the last couple of days. Nothing too out of moderation but it seems like I always need to have something different tasting the last couple days. I've dug into my salmon again (when I was sticking to stuff like chicken and turkey lunch meats) and even bought some fresh mandarins. Not sure what's with it... it's not a bad habit though. Perhaps my body is still missing something nutrition wise but I can't understand what. I take a multi vitamin every day as well as 1/2 the daily recommended intake of calcium pills (I still eat stuff like skim milk on my cereal, yogurts and ice cream so half is more then enough). Then again perhaps I'm just bored. The winter weather is setting in and I love to drink hot stuff when the weather gets cold.

With all the stuff I have been looking at as far as food goes and all the new things I'm trying as far as home cooking goes, I have been in search of a personal recipe program. Hubby is better at searching the web then I am due to my eye sight and he found me a couple of shareware ones (don't really want to pay for this when I can just as easily keep them in Word or something) and also a few freeware ones. I downloaded one of the freeware ones tonight and it seems pretty decent. It has places for all my recipes (even broken down into parts for me to enter like ingredients and directions) as well as a food list so I can keep track of things I use all the time and the nutritional information I need on them. This is cool because of wanting to keep track of all the calories, fat, carbs and proteins. I'm going to have to check it out more and I'm also going to look at the other freeware ones Peter found. If I find out that is better then the other or outstanding then the rest... I'll be sure to mention it. I'm not going to put all that much work into these programs yet though because my mother and hubby have been given hints that I want the FitDay PC program for my x-mas present this year. I will wait at least until after x-mas to really start putting work into them.

With mention things like my hair and such tonight, I decided to post a couple of pictures in this post of me. My hubby loves messing around with electric things and took some (what *I* thought were) VERY nice pictures of me. The first one is the "mini" picture that is already in my profile here and the other is in one of my favorite outfits as well as color. The close up picture shows me with my new glasses but not showing the nice long hair (I'm not currently wearing the new glasses because they have the wrong prescription, LOOOONG story but I hope in the next couple weeks I will have them fixed) and the one of me in purple shows me with my old glasses (even though it's hard to see) and showing off my hair (yep ladies... it's all natural waves/curls). I really like how I look in the first picture and hope to make a picture simular to it when I lose more weight. So what do people think of the hair as my "current" style and should I grow the rest out like I'm thinking??

Yes, again a small book written by me. This is a great place for me to get all these things off my mind and to remind myself there are a lot more "good" days then there are "bad" ones. It also lets me remember all the things that have happened during the day, my thoughts throughout the day and to take time to reflex on it all. It also gives me something to do. Can't likely be feeding my face if I'm typing away at something like 50wpm :D But with all that said, I think it's time to end this post. It's already a lot later then I should be awake being there is work tomorrow for Peter. I will be sure to write again tomorrow night. Goodnight everyone and pleasant dreams.

Hey girl. Remember me??? :o Well to be honest, I felt like I needed a break, so I took some time off from posting. Although I did keep reading, well most of your post anyway...hehe

It is so nice to see someone else that types a "book" in their journal. I just sit down and start typing as the thoughts come. Which reminds me, I've got 30 minutes of work left, so think I am going to type in my journal as I haven't been there in a few weeks either, yea I know bad me.. lol

Keep up the good work!! You are doing awesome!! (although I am still a blonde and get really confused when you talk about kilos and your stats 8-| but I will always be that way)

Today has been pure murder trying to not eat the house out. School helped some and then Peter coming home did as well. For whatever reason I have been really hungry today. Not craving but actually hungry. I only had a bit less then 1200 calories with dinner so that is good. I have grabbed another sandwich with a bit more salmon then normal, a banana and an iced tea tonight. It seems so far to be good but was even feeling quite weak before. Not sure what it due from but we'll see what happens when my sandwich kicks in. I was going to indulge in a nice big bowl of popcorn but somehow managed to burn it slightly and there is nothing worse then already being on a diet and then forcing yourself to eat something that was suppose to be a treat and ended up a nightmare type thing. It wasn't THAT bad but the smell of burned popcorn isn't appealing when you want something full of flavor and scent :D

As far as the rest of the day goes. Not much to tell. Fighting off being more hungry then normal, going to school, did a bit of sweeping. Seems hubby is bringing home half the dirt from his work. His work just moved last month to a new area of Gent and the area is still under construction so LOTS of mud and such. At least the move itself is done and out of the way.

Tomorrow is our normal weekly shopping day. The last couple of days have been sunny and dry... I hope tomorrow is as well. I need to go to the eye glasses place and get the proper lenes ordered for my new frame. When I was back in the States last year, I bought new glasses at the optical there because they had the "buy one and get the second free" thing. Peter needed new ones as well (if not for the prescription then definitely for style... he had these old "almost bigger then his face" glasses.... he looks much more handsome with the new more stylish ones). However, they got my prescription wrong. I have VERY bad astigmatism in both eyes and they completely messed that part of my prescription up. Needless to say this has led to a bunch of other stuff like headaches and nausea and the likes. I have gone back to my old glasses but they are badly scratched as well (the reason to get them replaced in the first place). So, after putting it off to make sure there wasn't something wrong with my eyes and that it was indeed the prescription, I need to get them ordered and fitted. Just to make sure I get the RIGHT prescription this time, I'm going to have them make my normal glasses the EXACT same prescription as my sunglasses. My sunglasses are in almost mint condition. No bends, no scratches and never been bent or shaped. I wore them for the better part of yesterday and felt better in them then I do my old glasses. I will be glad to see without the scratches.

Other then the glasses we have our normal food shopping. We have to go to 2 different store in order to get the things we need. We go to the local Aldi to get Peter's lunch items and the meat for our dinners, it's just cheaper. Then we go to the local super market to get everything else like my lunch meats, milk, eggs and the like. Since we have been watching the budget more and our diet, we even make a shopping list every week. It's been working well. This week I think is the first week that I have gone through without spending any extra money. I even realized that this might possibly be the first week since I've moved here that it has only been Peter spending a little extra then our weekly shopping. That makes me feel good. If I can do that now continuously, we'll be in a lot better shape money wise.

I would really like to check out that nature store I mentioned in earlier posts but I also just as much want Peter to be there as well so I don't go getting horse feed when I want corn flour or something to wash my feet with when I want something to brush my teeth with :D . Suppose I just have to be patient and wait for the end of the month when he has off work for it.

I really wish that some days, especially when the week has been a long one, that Peter would show a little more "want" to be with me. I suppose I'm too much of a "cuddle bunny" but *sigh*. I really need him sometimes more then others. Now being one of those "others". This diet isn't driving me nuts but trying to keep myself busy is hard alone. Perhaps the end of this month will help me.

Another and I figure the last subject for today. I have a couple of plants in the apartment. One is a spider plant and it's doing wonderfully. I just cleaned it up recently... took almost an hour but got rid of all the dead leaves and strands that weren't doing so w