Today is the day. It has officially been two months and fifteen days since my last cigarette. I have managed to prove the fact that when you quit smoking...you can gain back every single ounce of what you originally lost plus some. I am currently at 212 AGAIN! I feel like a disgusting pig on one hand but very happy to call myself a non-smoker on the other. If I can accomplish the latter I can accomplish the first. I hope.

Here I am again. Back at DT. The past 3 months have been a whirl wind. I was so stressed out that I managed to go out for lunch every day. Today is the day this stops. I have eaten oatmeal for breakfast and am going to have a sandwich for lunch. Time to change my eating habits around. I am going to need a lot of help. My fear is that my old friends at dt are upset with me. I haven't been a good supporter of others the way I come and go around here. I am hoping to change that.

I have also made myself a budget today. (I made one before but my hard drive crashed 2 months ago and I lost it...shoulda backed up I suppose) In this new budget I lowered the monthly dining expenses considerably. Hoping to save some of the dough I spend in that category for new clothes. Smaller clothes. Just last month I went and bought all new clothes. There isn't a single outfit I like. The entire wardrobe is the size I was in 3 years ago. I had given all of that size away to a friend last year, never thinking I would do this to myself again.

It's quite amazing what a day off from work will do. I took this day as a mental day. I was hoping that the brain would take a break for a little while. Guess that isn't so. Seems as though my brain is on overload. I feel weird. Not excited by any means. Usually I get pumped up to lose but this is not the case today. I guess I am just accepting the fact that I have to do it. Kinda like when I decided to quit smoking. I didn't really want to. I just did it. I still struggle with wanting a smoke. I guess this is how food is going to be as well. I can't have just one cigarette so maybe I shouldn't let myself have the just one treat. I am going to break out my BFL book again and reread. It is also time to clean the garage. (Not to mention hurricane season is here and I need to be able to fit the vehicles in it again)

Well, Gotta go. I will try to stop by frequently. Gotta get some more work done on this mental day.

Later
Julie

Julie :)
i am so happy to see you back posting..let me start out by saying that nobody here would be angry with you..we all have our own journey's..we all have battles to face and no matter how many times we start over thats ok..i am thrilled to see that you are doing so great with the non smoking..think of how many extra years you are adding to your life just with stopping the cancer sticks!
The determination that you have shown in quitting is exactly what you need to face the weight battle..you have proven that you have it in you babe..i believe in you!
i will keep checkin in to see your progress.
hugs bell :)

Yay! Julie is back! :cheer: mad? Heck, no! Happy! Why, YES!! You can do it baby girl! You know what scared me and made me stuck? *They* say it's harder to lose weight after you quit smoking.. but *they* are lying!! It's like it gives you an excuse. Congrats on 2 1/2 months.. That is amazing. :up:

Corinna

YAYYYYYYYY!!!! JULIE'S BACK!!!!!!!!!

mad at you??? never! we all have times we go hardcore on teh DT, and times we sort of look on from the sidelines. So, you're back in the game (and you smell mahvellous!!) and now it all begins! Consider this, Jan 1, and we're getting a resolution jumpstart (and you're already one down--kicking the butts is a FABULOUS achievement!!!!!!)

Hi Julie! Congrats on qutting smoking!!!! I quit in October and mangaed to gain all of the 35 lbs. I had lost.....I'm back here though just like you! I know that I will lose the weight EVENTUALLY and so will you...Atleast we can breathe now!!!!!! I'm proud of you!

HI YA JEWLS!!!:hug:

Can I say how Awesome you are to have stopped Smokin... GOOD FOR YOU.. Here. :1stprize:

When you were in the process of Detoxin your bod and mind from Cigeretts did you find Tha you were trying to occupy your time. Trying to find other things to do other then smoke?

I think it may work the same way with food. You can do this.. You know how. Were here for you georgeous... AND YOU KNOW YOU ARE. I 've seen your pic...

:hug:

Just wanted to say Welcome back and Congrats on the quit! You can win the food battle. I am happy to say I am a non smoker now for 3 years and 7 months! and 59 pounds lighter! Best of luck.

Wow! Thanks everyone for stoppin by. I really appreciate the support. I have to say I was definately busier than normal during the last two months. At times it kept my mind off smokes but at times I wanted one more than ever. I still feel that way. I hear food is the same way. You never stop wanting certain things but you have to remind yourself why you shouldn't eat them. I reminded myself AS I was shoving the banana pudding in my mouth...STUPID, STUPID, STUPID! I did so well during the day too. I had my oatmeal for breakfast, banana for snack, ww meal for lunch, granola bar for snack. No caffine at all (not even one cup of coffee!!!) tons of water then wrecked it when I got home. I got ticked off with the Dell people and lost my mind all at the same time.

So, today is another day. I refuse to beat myself up over the bad things I have done to my body. It wouldn't do any good anyway. I'm trying to look to the future. Unfortunately I can forsee tragedy coming my way. I am going to several work related functions within the next few days.

Gotta write more later
Julie

the bad things are rarely as bad as you fear they may be! Best o' luck!!! (Be strong, be srong...and know, there are no "bad" foods--just bad serving sizes :D )

I am glad you were able to quit smoking. That is a big accomplishment. Congratulations.

The healthy eating will come. Don't be hard on yourself. We all have days like yesterday. I can eat so perfect all day to then go home and eat way too much.

Nice thing about DT is that support is always here.

Carol

congrats Julie, you sound very healthy mentally and strong, the healthy habits will work there way back in. Look how far you have come , what a great example you are to all who think they cant quit smoking!

I had to leave suddenly during my last post. I don't even remember what train of thought I was on so I am going ahead with a new one.

I got swept away this morning to pick up some donations of filing cabinets and desks for work. (for those of you that don't know, I work for a non profit organization that helps developmentally disabled individuals) It was two female co-workers and myself. We like to call ourselves the SHE CAN movers. (came from she can move it faster and better than any man) If anything ever needs to be done around the office they look to me and my coworkers to help. Well, today we had three truck loads of furnature to pick up and it took us a couple hours to get it all done. Boy did it feel great though. I love doing stuff like that. Of course, now I am tired but it felt good at the time.

As I sit here reflecting on how fun that really was for me I also realize that this is just more proof that I feel better when I move my fat arse around a bit more.

Now to respond to you guys since I didn't have the chance earlier.

Bell, thanks so much. You are as always a true inspiration. I hope you are right about that determiniation thing.

Corinna, thanks! I wanted to prove to myself that I could accomplish something. I figured it would take less time for me to quit smoking than lose weight. I needed to see an accomplishment right away. Needed to feel better about myself somehow and thought quitting smoking was the way to go for me. Now that I have done that I need to accomplish the original goal. I think I have more motivation if I feel the need to prove to people I can do it.

Jess, January 1st it is then! Thanks for the cudos. I needed that . Saw you had a grand time in Sunny Florida. HEHE. It's raining right now. I wish I hadn't been so busy with work and had been around here more. I would have loved to meet up with you. Maybe next time.

Missy, thanks for stoppin by my journal. It's nice to see others that have kicked the habit. I'm still working on the breathing thing. I feel at times I still don't breathe the way I should be able to. But then again, I do have 18 years of bad lungs to clean out and if you ask my doctor...People like me just don't breathe well.

Mini, hehe yeah, I stayed busy. I stayed so busy I never had a chance to fix a real meal and managed to eat out for lunch and dinner just about every day for 2 months. I'm glad it is over for now. Time for me to get back into my routine. As far as the beautiful pic...I was a lot lighter then...FAT GIRL came back but won't be back for long!

BlueEyez, thanks so much for stoppin by. Do you still feel the need to smoke at times? I think I fight that battle every day. I hear it is a battle I will fight for the rest of my life. Just wanted your opinion on that one. congrats to you as well on the quitting as well as all of your weight loss!

Carol, Thank you! I wonder why it is easier for us to be so good while we are at work and flunk when we get home? I'm gonna have to ponder that one. I definately need to figure out how to make it stop.

Judith, I may sound mentally strong but now I need to prove it on the outside!

Thanks everyone for your continued support! I really appreciate it. It has taken me 8 and a half hours to complete my post for the day! LOL I hope I can do better tomorrow. Then again, I'm not really supposed to be on here at work and if I had waited until I got home it wouldn't have taken me so long huh! :D

Later everyone
Julie

Hi

Welcome back! I haven't been around much lately either. Congrats on quitting smoking! That is great.

Yep, it is hurricane season once again. Hopefully, this year's will be better. I hope so since a good friend is moving to Pensacola next week.

Good luck!
renee:)

So, how was your today? :)

Hey Julie, congrats on the quitting smoking!!! I am quit 1 year, 2 weeks and I am incredibly proud of myself. I gained 25 pounds BUT 15 of those I gained in one month, the first 3 months I didn't gain and I have lost 10 of those pounds already. I have actually develped a taste for fruit since I quit. I am applying a lot of what I learned from quitting smoking to loosing weight: dealing with cravings, saying goodbye to crutches (trying to), looking more long term etc. And really, the best thing of all is that I only have to focus on one thing now: loosing weight and that is why staying off the cigarettes is my number one priority. It's so nice to see another ex-smoker around!!

Thanks everyone for all of your support! I means the world to me right now.

I am hoping to make this a quick report. We shall see. I must admit I have not been the best on diet this week. So far I have lost one lb though. I wasn't completely bad either. I managed to achieve one of my goals this week. I am completely off caffine. Not one soda or cup of coffee since Sunday. YEAH! Now to accomplish something else.

I do have a vision now. Last night I made hotel reservations for Blowing Rock NC. This will be my first official family vacation I have ever been on. I am so excited. I've been wanting to break away from always visiting my family in virginia (other vacations are spent doing chores at home). This year is different. It took me getting really mad at my mom to decide that enough was enough. I need to do this for my family. I think we will have a blast! There is so much I want to do with the girls. My head is just spinning! I'm having a hard time concentrating at work. :) I have not told my mom and dad yet. I know my grandmother will be disappointed but I am hoping to fly her to me in october. If anyone has any suggestions as to what to do in Blowing Rock/Boone let me know.

Now I really have to work on diet and exercise. My fat girl shorts are getting a little tight. Need to at least have the clothes feeling comfortable before I leave. I'm not expecting a miracle but need to feel better. Gotta get on that treadmill and start lifting those weights again if I am going to be able to climb those mountains! :lift:

I must say it has really been nice seeing all the exsmokers coming out of the woodworks. I really appreciate the support of all of you!

Will try to check on others later
Julie

Hi

Blowing rock will be fun. I've driven by that way and it is pretty there. I went with the family as a kid. Ya'll will have great fun.

Good luck with getting back with the exercise! My plan is to restart back to the gym on Monday:)

Have a great weekend.
Renee

your family vacation sounds like it will be great fun Julie...
Hope you are having a great weekend.
hugs bell :)

heeee. I saw renee's post and thought about smoking crack. I had to double-take :) Sounds like good (Clean!!) family fun!!

Hi Julie! I have missed you. :hug:

Congrats on quitting smoking. That's one major accomplishment out of the way. You are so awesome. I admire anyone who can kick such a bad habit. :1stprize:

I hope you have a terrific family vacation. When do you leave?

Welcome back, and thanks for visiting my journal! Sorry I was gone for the past few weeks, and haven't really been able to post much. Sure have missed ya! :D

OMG So much to tell

It looks as though I may not be going to NC after all. Looks as though the mountains of Tennessee are it. My boss's husband's cousin owns a house that was built on a cliff. Two story, three bedroom, wrap around poarch that hangs over the Mountain. Should be beautiful. It's about 15 minutes northeast of Gatlinburg. They have offered to rent it to me for the week. No hotel! Yippee!!!!

On the flip side, I wish I could leave the husband at home. I am so ticked with him I could scream. (I did that on saturday am actually) DH has decided to be single and in his 20's again. He pulled an all nighter friday night. Funny thing is, he worked late all week. Was not getting home until 2:30 am some nights and whining that he was tired....I have no sympathy now. He said he was talking about me the whole time. BS...I don't give a sheet what he was talking about...it was absolutely unacceptable that a man in his 30's with a wife and 2 kids be out with the boys all night. He then said he didn't have a watch and lost track of time. I mentioned next time he should look at the cell phone...it has a time on it. I also went to Walmart and purchased a watch that has two watches in it (so if he's to drunk to read the hands he can look at the numbers) and a timer on it so he can set it for when he needs to be home. Not that I will ever let him go out again. At least not for a while anyway. I have never been a ball and chain but if you can't respect me then I will make your life hell. He crossed the line on Saturday and it will be a long time before I forgive him for this one.

So, now he want's to be a part of the family. We'll see how long this lasts.

Today...ugh, Meghan set me on fire this am. Amber asked if her and her sister could have two brownies in their lunch. I said yes. Meghan misunderstood and decided she would eat her brownie for breakfast. I asked her what the heck she thought she was doing...she said eating..I said not for breakfast...she had only one bite left so I said to go ahead and finish it...she asked for another in her lunch, I said no, that was not fair to her sister who was good and packed it in her lunch. She started to cry...I told her to stop crying because it was a misunderstanding but just remember that brownies are not breakfast food and she starts crying harder because I would not let her have another one for lunch. OMG...5 YEAR OLDS So during all this rucus...I forgot to give Amber her medicine (she has a cough and stuffy nose) So I took them to camp. Felt guilty all morning for being a bad mom and not remembering the meds I took lunch, ran by the house, got the meds, went to camp, gave meds to Amber, kissed her and told her I loved her, Went by the library to pick up my book (Angels and Demons) stopped by McDonalds for lunch (I was starving and No it was not healthy...I'll dwell on that choice later) went to Mobil and got an oil change and went back to work all in one hour. So, here I sit exhausted. I have to leave a few minutes early today from work. We have the big party tonight for the WineQuest Wrap UP at 7pm...I have to find time to feed the kids, take them to the gym for class before 5:30, take them to the sitter by 6:45 and be at the party by 7. I'm tired. I'm wondering if it ever slows down.

Renee - welcome back as well. So much for blowing Rock. Maybe another time. Get back to the gym! I need to do the same. I will admit that I worked my tail off yesterday afternoon doing all the neglected yardwork. I guess some exercise is good. I am terribly out of shape though. Felt it yesterday.

Bell, thanks

Jess, hehehe blowing rock...smoking crack...whatever...hehe

Rikki - thanks a bunch! Sounds like you've been having a blast yourself! To answer your question the Evening of July 22nd. We will be back Thursday July 28th. The kids start school again August first. I needed to be back in time for the meet the teacher/school supply drop off day Friday the 29th. I also want to be sure to alot myself time for obtaining any supplies/clothes before school starts.

Well, I gotta scat. Need to get some work done.

Later
julie

gah. the hubster needs a steel-toed boot to his pants, pulling that crap! How not-cool!! The vacation house sounds awesome, though, like there's enough space that you and he don't even have to breathe the same air, should you choose not to.

...Is that the Wal-Mart by the Medical Center near Gotha? (Yes, yes, I know it well :) )

Angels and Demons is a great book..hope you enjoy it!
The holiday house sounds great...make hubby earn his right back into the family i say..make him sweat :)
hugs bell :)

Hey Julie,
The vacay house sounds AMAZING! I wish we could do something like that. I told my hubby next time (if ever) we go back to Hawaii, we should invite my sisters and their hubbies to share a house with us. It'd be cheaper than a hotel (and probably more fun too!)

Yuck about hubby being a jerk. That's so weird that he's acting like that. I wonder what his problem is. Sorry your daughter was giving you fits too. I can sort of relate. When my littlest sister was visiting, she started crying about the stupidest stuff! Like if we wanted her to go down a water slide, and she "just couldn't do it." She is sort of a drama queen. She'd say "I'm so mad at myself. I really want to go down, but I just can't! You don't understand!" (She turns 10 on Thursday. Talk about drama!)

Hope you have a better day. I bet you're excited for your vacation! :D

hi

Your hubby sounds like mine. he went out Friday night with friends, they got in at 7:30 am just as I was getting up to start the day. Then I hear from both, going to sleep until noon. Not in my house you're not. I was not a nice person. And I didn't feel bad when they were hung over :laugh:

Tennessee mountains are pretty also. I've camped in them.

We don't start school until the end of August, although the kids are doing a summer enrichment program at the school in July. Gives me a nice break in the mornings.

Have a great day.
Renee:)

and I thought MY day was crazy???!!!!!!!

Yours Wins ! lol :laugh:

PS: do you own a cast iron frying pan for hubby.............I too would be spitting nails !

Hang Tough ! :)

Beth :dance: