Well yesturday I turned 17. Whoopdedo, it really was not that great. I am really depressed that I have not lost any weight recently, so I decided that since I am not a full year older that I am going to try harder and prove to myself that I can lose the weight for good. I want to weight 135-140 pounds by the time I turn 18; I have one year. But I want to weigh 150 by the end of september, I have about 2 and a 1/2 months. It really is not looking too good at the moment. I am still sitting at 170, THE SCALE IS NOT MOVING! It is driving me crazy. Tomorrow I am going to start my new "lifestyle" off with a water fast, just for one day to rid my body of some toxins, I certainly cannot go a week like some people....I work HELLO! I found a really great before picture to post for when I do make my goal, I was really really excited because I was not sure that I was going to find one at my biggest since I would not allow people to take pictures of me, but i found one where I am pretty dang heavy looking. Today I ate half a bagel, an order of french fries, green beans, and some mac and cheese...what a way to start off my new year huh? I did drink a fair amount of mountain dew too, but really it puts me in a better mood...believe it or not! I did drink a decent amount of water too, about 60 ounces...not a lot, but good. I had this great idea when I got home from work to go on a hike too with some friends and we did for about 45 minutes, but dang am I tired, I was breathing hard too when we went. I am so out of shape. I start basketball in a month almost exactly. I have about 4 weeks to get into decent shape, it is going to be a toughy. I started working out again today. I am going to start running more and more everyday. I am going to work some type of exercise in everyday to lose weight, feel better, and get in shape for basketball. Time allowing days (days I dont work) I am going to get to the gym and this week run for 15 minutes walk for 20 minutes. So I will probably warm up with 5 minutes walking and then off and on with 5 minutes of running. I think that will help get me in shape, and next week I will go 7 and 7 or something, increasing my indurance each week. HOPEFULLY I will begin to start losing weight again, I need to start lifting again too. I was doing really well for a couple weeks, but got too busy and too bored with it. Anyone know how I feel? I am going to try and join a pilates class, if not maybe buy a dvd, but really those dvd things never work for me. I usually do them halfa** because I know no one is going to judge me if I quit, but at classes they of course can see you when you are slacking off! Oh yea I bought some of this dove firming lotion, hopefully it does something for me! lol and then the rejuvinating night lotion too.

Things to work on this year:
attitude
self-image/respect/confidence
diet (healthier)
athletic abilities, increase
work on revealing six pack ( I am sure I got one in there some where...it is just hiding out right now...Im keeping it cold...LOL)
Other things that are not good for your health.
drinking less soda

Things to aim for this next month:
- 4 days per week of running/walking or at lest 30 minutes of some type of exercise.
- strength and core training 2/3 days per week
- loss of 8 lbs.
- firming arms and thighs
- get in shape for basketball

Hi Runshot! Hope this is YOUR year. You can do it. You just have to want it. I think you've done so well so far. You just have to be patient, and realize that this is not a quick fix. I was stuck at 170 for quite a long time. I had to really start mixing it up then. I got into counting cals and exercising, and made it to 148. I've gotta lower my cals now, though, as I was stuck at 150 for the longest time!!! :sigh:

I have a pilates DVD that I like. I don't do it all the time, but I like it to have when I'm in the mixing mood. I got it at everyone's favorite store (Wal-Mart! Ha ha!) for about $9. It's the Crunch Fitness Pick your Spot Pilates. It's pretty good. I feel like I get a good workout from it.

Good luck! %%-

I might go check that out today, $9 isn't much, thanks! I know things will start moving again, it just scares me to think that it might take forever!

I did not get out to wal-mart today...but I did go shopping for like 7 hours! lol We went to 3 different malls trying to find outfits for this friday (my crazy birthday party)! Ah! All the shopping really made me hungry X-( , I did however go for something a bit healthier than usual. I had oven roasted chicken sandwich at subway with cheese, but no dressings. I also had a cookie and some cherry coke though :( , I am guessing it came up to about 500 cals. But with all the walking I mean...it had to have been burned off, well most of it anyway. When I got home from shopping at about 10 ish, I decided to have a pear and some green beans. (220 cals ish), but then I started getting even more hungry and made myself some grilled cheese, but it was on this great 40 cal per slice whole wheat bread. So....that was about 150 cals ( I also used I cant believe its not butter spray 0 cals!! Great stuff). So my "water fast" did not really go as planned, but I did drink a lot of water, actually everything I drank besides that one cherry coke was water, so I think I accomplished something, I was also ALWAYS moving today, so much actuallly my back sort of hurts...that is like 870 calories for the day...decent!

It won't take forever. Hey, that's great that you only had one soda today! Remember when you had lots of Mtn. Dew at the beginning? See, you didn't have to give it up. Just drink less of it.

I like shopping because I feel like it wears me out. I like all the walking. There is this great outdoor mall where my in-laws live, and I love going there. It's even within walking distance from their house! So it's always great when I decide to go shopping in Lincoln!

Have a great day. :flower:

Yea, shopping is definitely a fun way to get some exercise in.

Today I worked. I ate really well until I got home from work. Then I guess I sort of went crazy. For breakfast i had a granola bar, lunch I had some pretzels and mt dew and for dinner I had some green beans, baked chicken, and some red potatoes. I then ate a piece of cake. Then my friend and I went out to the fair and we shared an elephant ear...oh god do not even want to know that calories in that fat soaked piece of heaven....lol. Anyway, thats not even it! We then went to visit someone who worked at this store and i bought some bbq chips! Geesh. I am estimating I was at about 2000 calories today, which is horrid! But good news...this morning I saw a small drop in the scale. Believe me I was happy! Tomorrow I am going to try my best to get up by 9:15 and get to the gym for some exercise. I am going to try and do 30 minutes of 2 min walk 1 min run off and on or something along those lines. I am also going to try and eat less tomorrow, well at least less calories.

What is an elephant ear?

My favorite things at the fair are funnel cakes with cherries on top, and REAL lemonade. I'm so glad the fair is only once a year. If I had more than one funnel cake a year, I'd be a blimp!

Have a great time at the gym. Woo hoo on the drop in the scale! I love those days!

This morning the scale was still steady, but...I did go to the gym this morning. I did a 4 min warm up and then 1 min run then 2 min walk for 30 minutes (including the 5 min cool down) hey, at least I got something in...right? I feel good about it. Tomorrow I konw I will not be able to get to the gym early because I have to be at work at 8, but tomorrow night I may go on a walk or something if I cannot get to the gym, but I am sure going to try. For breakfast this morning I had 1 piece of cinnamon raisen bread at 80 calories and a glass of fat free milk at 90 cals so only 170 calories so far today. Well I am off to get ready for work, enjoy your day everyone! And thanks for stopping by again RickiJ!

You have a new journal!

How did I miss that? good luck, I so believe in you. My scale isn't really moving either but then again I usually lose weight by maintaining for 5 days and then losing 3 pounds in a day so I'm hoping that I'll somehow recover. I've never had funnel cake because I know that I am going to love it and I just don't want to do that to myself.

Good job on all of that running! I hate working out, and sweating, and... well everything. I do like to dance though so I'm trying to get 30 minutes total a day of crazy bad dancing!

~K

Hey Kelsey, I haven't really talked to you in awhile, nice hearing from ya! Maybe I will try just turning up some music tonight while cleaning and dancing too, that should count as exercise, I mean I will be sweating and I'll try to make myself run out of breath...lol. So I have some things to look forward to and to boost my motivation. On july 10th I leave for NYC once again. I want to look better than i did last time, I know I do at this point, but I am DETERMINED to lose 5lbs. before we go just to secure some compliments....lol. Most of these people have not seen me since April/May so hopefully they see a change. Then when the day after I get home, basketball practice starts. My senior year in high school, I want to look great, but who doesn't right? I want to certainly lose 10 by Labor day weekend. I know basketball (3 hours of continuous running) will certainly help, so that is a good thing, but I only have like 3 weeks to get into DECENT shape so I can survive running that much in 80-90 degree weather. Yesturday I ate alright and today I did a bit better, I did not eat much, but I took a nap so really I should not have. I think I ate some hashbrowns and a roll for breakfast and then just recently I had a subway roasted chicken breast 6 inch with cheese and a few chips with dip so probably about 500 calories for dinner and maybe 250 for breakfast, so I am really low today, but I did drink some soda so that might up it to like 900 or so maybe, I really don't feel like eating, I dont really have an appetite anymore, but when I get extremely tired I just grab something because I know I should not go without eating and that something usually is not too great for me. Tomorrow I'm having a party and all the empty calories in the things that I am going to drink is not going to be good, so I am going to keep my cals low throughout the day with green beans and other good for you foods.
Hope everyone enjoys their weekends...Ill write again Saturday night.

It's sometimes hard to eat during the summer. I think the heat makes you less hungry. Either that, or you don't want to cook! (That's my problem!) At least in the winter, I can look forward to the oven heating the house. In the summer...fuggettaboutit! :sigh:

Wow, that's cool that you play basketball. In HS, I did volleyball for a few years. I was always amazed that after the first day or so of practice, I could barely move. I had sore muscles where I didn't even KNOW there were muscles!!! Good luck with B-ball. And have fun in NYC! That's pretty cool. Do you have relatives there?

And enjoy your senior year of high school! It goes by quick! I can't believe I've been out of HS for, like 6 years!!!

Yea, the summer is good when it comes to not eating much. I don't have any relatives in NYC we just take trips to places like that occasionally.

I feel horrible. This really has nothing to do with diet, but my party last night got a little out of hand. People just kept coming and coming and I could not keep track really of everything that was going on. It sounds horrible. I mean I did not drink much and I did not eat at all so thats good I guess, but my friends did some stupid things that can never be forgiven, which really sucks, I do not want to lose friends over something stupid, but I just cannot face them right now, like seriously I just want to beat the sh*t out of them. I know that sounds horrible too, but if I do not get some of this out I am going to. Who knows...I wont be having another party for a long while I know that much. It was fun for me though, so that was pretty cool. I am going to the gym to get away now, I'll be there for an hour or longer so I will come back and write afterwards. I'll probably just go to sleep after that....

Today I ate some potato wedges and had some mountain dew. I am going to drink some water because even I know I need some right now... :(

Sucks about the party. For my 17'th I had like 15-20 of my closer friends come over for an 80's party. No drinking involved, lol. Actually come to think of it, I've never actually been to a party where there was drinking involved, well more drinking than like a glass of champagne for a birthday or russian new year with my parents where there is drinking. I don't think I'm missing out on too much.

Have fun at the gym, I sort of want to go too

Well I just got home from the gym...I am so out of it, like I cannot even think, and not because of drinking or anything last night, just sort of thinking...you know? Anyway I got 30 minutes on the elliptical trainer and 20 on the tredmill, it was boring, but I really do not have anything better to do so it was alright. I might work on my room and clean my car today which would be even more exercise sort of. I really want to get down to 167 this week, so I am going to try really hard, like I am not going to eat much, I guess if my body is in starvation mode, then i have to eat less than I have been, which might suck, but if I see some scale movement in a good direction it will be worth it. But I do have a question, which sort of makes me thing, what happens when I lose all the weight I want to. Will I gain a ton if I keep my cals back at 1500, wouldn't that be a good "stabilizer" amount of calories, I mean I would not expect to lose anymore, but not gain either, who knows, I guess it probably matters how much I work out too. And hey kelsey, I'm heading over to your journal now to say hi...lol.

Holy crap~!! I just closed this out right...then I was getting ready to go take a nap and decided why not top my "wonderful" day off by weighing myself and I did and it was at 167!!!!! OMG I cannot believe it! This is crazy stuff, but why should I argue and the scale doesn't lie!! This makes my day a little better, my new goal for the end of this week is 165, that would be great, then 160 by the 10th....hmmm the scale is moving now so I think I might be able to do it!

Good job...I love it when the scale moves.

Hmm so I had some mac and cheese but seriously like a small bowl because I wasn't taht hungry. Then I had some other healthy food...some chips and dip...but again only one serving so really not bad. BUT THEN I went out and got ice cream because I thought that sounded good, but it sucked! I just threw it away seriously, I am not just saying this to make myself feel better. I feel hungry, but I just don't feel like eating. Oh yea, good news for me, 3 different guys called from last night asking me to hang out tonight, but I can't tonight unfortunately 8-| , but it's still flattering...right!?!?!?!?! Of course!

Today was junk food heaven day. Truthfully, I did not enjoy it much and I still feel sick. So tomorrow...no junk food for me, it's just not that tasty anymore. To add on to what I ate is a candy bar and a few more chips with dip. I feel crappy...mostly because everything I ate contains a bunch of fat! eew! I did get to the gym today for longer than I have in a long time, so that sort of makes it not so bad, but I know that equaling out will never get me anywhere. So tomorrow it's all about being healthy!

Congrats on the goals! My next goal for the next week is to have 4 days where I follow the diet. Just 4 days.. I think that I can manage that, right?

ps my diet = 1000-1200 cals

I am sure you can do it Kelsey! Just take it one day at a time and the 4 days will be over in no time!

Today I ate a sub sandwich w/ turkey and cheese and I had some green beans...so far. I also had a glass of moutain dew and a 20 oz. of pepsi. So I am guessing that I am at about 700 calories, mostly because of the soda. I am going to probably go get myself something to eat tonight, because we are going out, so something quick, maybe subway because I think my favorite sandwich is only 2.50 today...so thats cheap and yummy, and not too bad for me, maybe 350 calories with the cheese added, something around there anywhere.

I love subway! ok so sunday = turkey and ham? My fave is a turkey on wheat with no cheese or mayo but lots of pepperchinies (sp is def not right) olives, peppers, spinach, and cucumber. MMmm.. makes me hungry

I still can't understand why you won't switch to diet. It tastes so much like the real thing and you'll be at like 500 cals a day without it. I know how you feel though, I'm addicted to diet coke. Do you want to try to pull through a day of no soda together? I'm willing to give up my 5 or so cans a day habit just to feel what it would be like 8-| .

~k

Kelsey, Yea, that doesn't take up time, but it would be really hard. I'll try with you...what day do you want to do it? I cannot go a whole week yet...not cold turkey...lol. Let's say hmmm....Tuesday sound good? That is a really good idea, I know I wish I really liked diet, like I try to, but I guess I am just stubborn.

Good news, I realized today I like how I look, I mean I don't LOVE it, but with everyone telling me how great I look I am starting to believe it. Great things are happening for me and it just makes me feel good. It helps with not eating much too, if I am happy I don't think there is much reason to eat...which is great!

That's great! what size have you gotten to?

Well the last time I went shopping I got into a 9/10, but I know that's not concrete, I am probably more like an 11, but if it has stretch sometimes 9/10.

Today I ate some green beans(75), a few fries (150), some mountain dew (300), a mcmuffin (350), and 1 cup of this noodle and hamburger stuff (300). I am guessing I was at about 1200ish, I know that doesn't add up right, but I estimated on some values.

Tonight I had this urge to exercise, wierd eh? and I did not want to get on the tredmill or do something that I had so I went out and bought that Crunch Pick your Spot Pilates that RickiJ recommended. I just finished the 30 minute workout of belly, butt, and thighs and I do feel that I got a fairly good workout, especially the thighs actually, the butt part was not too great, but really I don't need to work my butt as much as my thighs so great huh? lol I will tell you tomorrow if I hurt (that means it really does work...lol). Thank you RickiJ! Have you noticed any difference since you have been using it? I am going to try and do it (well at least until I get bored with it) every day, some of it anyway, if I can't get all three maybe 1 or 2, sort of mix it up, but then at least I am getting some exercise in, but doing it made me realize that I need to stretch I am not very flexible anymore! 8-|

Work out tapes, eh? I have a lot at Ross and I think that I'm going to buy some more while I still get the 20% employee discount. Good job on the food too.

~k

So I did not do pilates yesturday. I did however feel my muscles in my "core" or stomach which is really cool. So yesturday was also horrible when it came to the foods I ate, I am not even going to list them because it is so horrible, like seriously yuck and what I drank is even worse. I know tonight I am going out to eat with some friends so I am going to try and not eat too much until then. Right now I am having a poptart and a glass of milk (310 cals). For lunch I might bring some poptarts because they taste sooo good, but I am not sure yet.

Hey Kelsey, what day did you want to do that no pop thing?

Any day is good.. but I'd rather kick nightime eating. So you can do no pop, I can do no eating after 8. Do you want to do it tomorrow?

Hi runshot! I'm glad you like the pilates DVD. Thanks for reminding me. I am going to start doing it twice a week or so since DH and I started running in the evenings instead of the morning. We'll get toned together! :)

Have a great day! The no pop thing sounds like a great plan. Good luck!

Hey sorry I haven't got back to you Kelsey, I have been SOOOOO busy lately, but I love it, but tomorrow I m taking a bit of a break, well during the day anyway. I have been hanging with friends, eating out, and partying a bit too much lately. Well hanging out with friends isn't really the problem, but I am going to work on controlling myself no matter what the atmosphere; I am talking about monitoring what I eat and drink. I have decided to go one day really low in cals and the next day normal or not as low, so that way I am still going low in cals, but not allowing myself to go into starvation mode. Like I know many of you may not agree, but I am going to keep my cals at about 800 tomorrow. The next day I am going to go to about 1500. I am going to give it a try because I really do not feel like eating much, which is good but since I dont want my cals to be too low, I just eat whatever, but this way I know that I need to eat something, but it has to be healthy.

Alrighty, so my plan so far is working. I am at about 700 calories today (subway sub 310, subway cookie 200, and some coke 180ish) So I am estimating 700, that leaves me 100 calories for later, at the moment I am not hungry at all and since I don't eat before I go out (because my clothes fit better when I dont...hello bloated!) I probably won't eat anything else today, if IF i do though, it will be some green beans that wont make me exceed my 100 calories I have left. I am a bit scared of what I drink tonight though...hmmm....I am giong to try my best not to drink much, I am actually not sure in the amount of cals in some things, but if I do I will try to wait until 12 so I can count those cals for tomorrow...which I can go again without eating much since I probably won't be feeling awesome and i have to work which helps. OMG yesturday I seen someone I have not seen since school got out and they told me that i Looked skinny...skinny...no way....but seriously they said it! Crazy stuff. And then today my sister (very skinnY) and I went to the mall and I went to get a new shirt for tonight and shes like, "all these shirts look good on you now because your stomach is flat!" I am like freaking out, because really it sort of is, but my thighs...gosh...my thighs....not very fond of them, need to get those looking good now. Today I did pilates with my sister, we did the belly and thigh parts, so today was my third day. I am hoping to see some kind of results after 10 workouts, because that is the "usual" time for most new exercises to start showing, you know what I mean? OH yea, it is that TOM and I still weight 167, how great huh? So maybe I can be 165 by Sunday? maybe....

I think that your diet is a good idea but why not try keeping your cals at 1000 at least. You'll have more energy then.. oh well good luck and congrats on the compliments! you've worked hard to deserve them

~K

I may, but 1000 doesn't seem that low to me, but if I exercise (which I am giong to start doing more religiously) Ill make it 1000, instead of 800. Last night I did eat some green beans so I ended at around 775 calories. I did however eat way later, after midnight, so I decided to count that as today, so I wouldn't feel so horrible. I probably ate about 500 calories last night, I didn't eat breakfast, but then i had 2 poptarts for lunch (400 cals) and then a mt.dew 300 cals, for dinner I had taco salad which I would say was about 500 cals altogether, maybe a little less. so tday I am a little higher than I wanted 1700 cals to be exact, but it's all good, I feel good, I may even get a small ice cream later with my sister, but a small def. soft serve, not that that really matters much...but all well.

Well I did not get that ice cream...it feels good. I will tomorrow though, well if I still really want one. I do today, but I am going to try my hardest not to get one. I am at about 700 calories today so far. I am really full right now too, so I will probably not eat dinner, but since my mom is cooking my favorite, I may later, I did do 10 minutes of pilates this morning and I am going to do 20 minutes more later. Tomorrow I start going to the gym again with a friend of mine. I am going to try and go 6 days per week. It may feel hard, but the benefits will be great! My ultimate goal is to lose about 12-13 pounds by the time school starts in about 5 weeks. That seems like a lot, and it is, but I am giong to really really push myself. 40lbs. down will certainly be noticable. I already feel much better about myself then I ever did before and I have more energy. It really is great. I just keep thinking now about other things I need to change, but it doesn't bother me as much as being overweight does/did. Really being as heavy as I was kept me from doing the things I love or might love. I avoided situations where I may be called or even considered too fat or just fat alone...anyone know how I feel? I seriously still always worry about that and I am soo obsessed with my looks, not in a vain way, but in a scared way I guess...who knows, hopfully it is something that I will eventually get over, but really I wish that no one could ever get overweight, especially while they are younger, it seriously takes away from their "youth", it made me grow up much faster because I had to deal with issues before other girls did, I dunno i was just thinking today, probably better not to, but I wish everyone the bestest of luck in losing weight and keeping it off! Not that anyone reads this anyways....

Well I read this! we have the same goal in pounds to lose and time! how fun (not)
It does get easier with time I guess, oh well.. good luck!

~K

You could lose the 12-13 lbs by the time school starts, just cut out any carbs or sugar and exercise your ass off, but don't go over board with this dieting. Your goals shouldn't be about the weight completely, I know as cliche as it sounds but it is a life style change. If you are in it just to lose the weight really fast then you may be setting yourself up for a life of yo-yo dieting. It may helpful for you to think about at what point in your life did you start to gain weight and what was going on in your life that made you start eating, because if you find out the reason you put the weight on in the first place it may be easier for you to take it off and keep it off. Good luck to you.

Kelsey thank you for reading it! I know you do because your great! I was just getting ready to cook pizza and reading this made me realize that I don't need it, I mean I a STARVING because I haven't ate anything since early yesturday evening, but I think I am going to just have some green beans at enjoy my 75 calories and maybe some mt.dew so actually 185 calories for breakfast/lunch. Today is actually my 1500 calorie day, and I am going to the gym, so I may want to eat a little more so I have more energy (because when you said that I should eat more when I exercise, or maybe it was your journal where I really realized it is probably a good idea).

Vulgarian20 thanks for the positivity! Really, I am not being sarcastic or anything, sometimes it can sound that way so I just want to make sure...you know. But I will be exercising my "ass" off well hopefully not my ass, but my thighs...that would be nice. I think I am going to go to the gym for at LEAST an hour today. I often remind people that they shouldn't "diet" but change their lifestyle, but I often do the same, I mean I don't necessarilly diet, but I do change how I eat, but really I would love to try and stay under so many calories forever, I guess my maintaining will be like a lifelong diet, although I do not like to think of it that way, it is a lifestyle change, but I guess I have not fully grasped that yet since I still eat some of the things I do eat, it is just really hard living with your parents still who buy your food for you...you know? But I guess it is just an excuse, but thank you for making me realize that I do need to get my act together and eat "good" foods and not so much junk, not that you said that exactly, but in so many words that is what I got from it...lol...so thanks! Oh yea, about not drinking soda for a WHOLE YEAR?!!?!?! That is amazing, I can barely go a day!

Dude.. eat some more. Soda is hardly a good breakfast. Why don't you eat some eggs or cereal or something. I noticed that you lost .5 pounds (that's great!) have fun at the gym you rock!

~K

The gym went fairly well. I did some running/walking with incline intervals for 30 minutes on the tredmill and then I did 10 minutes on the elliptical, I started to get really bored so it wasn't that easy to keep going. But I did use the hipductor machines for about 10 minutes too. I am going to do pilates too for probably the full 30 minutes later, today is my day off so I am going to get some things done too, like clean my car and room and do some laundry, so I guess it's some more exercise I guess...great eh? It is just so hot though, it makes doing almost everything difficult and unpleasant. Anyway, I am going to go make some...uh...pizza...I hate saying it, but I am it's 410 calories, that is a lot, but it's good and really there isn't much else in the house and I am getting a bit tired of green beans, but I am drinking propel so that is good, only 15 calories.

I really like propel! I like the melon and the kiwi strawberry. Good stuff!

I tend to get a little bored on the eliptical sometimes too. Today I thought about doing it, but the treadmill won out. I so didn't want to do the "boring" machine today! :laugh:

Thanks for reminding me to get off my butt and do Pilates. I think the plan is to start doing it 2 or 3 times a week in the mornings. We should keep each other posted on the results we see! :)

Kiwi strawberry is really good! Like my favorite, but I like grape too. So I went a little overboard with the pizza...unfortunately, but for dinner I just had 1 pb and j sandwich and then i went out and got a baby ice cream cone. so I am estimating myself at about 1400 calories today, which is still under my "limit" of 1500, tomorrow is another low calorie day, I am sort of excited for it, because everytime I eat, espececially if I eat too much my stomach hurts extremely bad for like an hour. Really it's awful pains, I am going to bring it up to my doctor if it's still happening in a week or so, but I think it may be because I have not been eating much, so my stomach can't handle it or something, I really do not know...whatever though, it sort of keeps me from eating...right?!! So tomorrow I am going to drink propel at work and not get any mt.dew...think I can do it? WE'll see! Oh yea...I forgot about pilates today too, I should do that...but I might just save that for the morning since I am pretty tired and I did get to the gym today. Oh yea more stuff...I am going to get up early and go to the gym tomorrow, I am taking this 6x per week exercise seriously this time, I really need to make it a habit and I heard somewhere that if you do it for like 13 days it becomes a habit or maybe it was 28...hmmm...well I am going to push hard definetly as long as I can...have fun everyone! And this week is starting great!

that sounds great! the best way to get rid of an addiction is to get another addiction and I think that propell should be your new addiction

Hey girl. I did my pilates today. 30 minutes. I forgot how fun it was! THe plan is to do it twice this week. I am also running 4 miles in the afternoons. No way we can't reach our goals with all this exercise, eh?

Good luck on your propel challenge! I picked up some mega bottles of the stuff for about $1 each! You'll have to check it out. Propel is kinda expensive, but I thought $1 on 32 oz was cheaper than $1 on 20 oz of Mtn. Dew!

Have a great day! Enjoy the gym! :D Oh, and I know how you feel about the tummy hurting thing. When I stopped eating so much, I noticed I felt "Thanksgiving Full" if I splurged. It was uncomfortable. I also share french fries with my hubby when we go out, so if I eat the entire carton by myself (and I usually just CAN'T) I feel so sick. Anyway, have a great day.

I'm glad someone else has felt the same way RickiJ about the stomach thing. 4 miles...that is awesome! I am going to try and work my way back up there, I was doing so well, but then got really busy and bored with it and lacked motivation totally. I didn't get to the gym today, but I worked all day, but I am going to try and go tomorrow morning again...main word..>TRY!

Propel would be a good thing to get addicted too, but I still love my mt.dew. I decided the grape tastes best, but they all have an odd aftertaste...hmmm...I'll get used to it.

Today so far I ate a stick of jerky for breakfast with a mini propel (100 cals) and then for lunch I had 3/4 of a pb and J sandwich, a mini propel, and some of my friends mt.dew (325 calsish) , well I am doing really well so far, and today is supposed to be one of my low cal days, but I am going out to eat with my mom tonight so I will probably end at about 1000 calories or so, not too shabby, but I could do better, I'll write again after dinner.....

Dinner...was GOOD. I had a hot beef sandwich...mmmm. It was worth not eating much all day let me tell you. My stomach is killing me though, I am going to be going to bed soon so that means no more eating!!

Oh yea...while at dinner my mom and I were talking and I told her to guess how much I weigh...well she really doesn't/didn't know because she just knows that I am insecure about that and doesn't really ask...I dunno...you probably dont get it, but anyway she guess 140-145!! I was like dont play....tell me the truth and she said she was! I was like dang...thats good!

lol! I'm sure that you look great and you really don't have that much more to go until you are down to your final goal.

When I weighed 150 (and I'm not that far from it, now! :o ) My friend told me I was crazy that I wanted to lose more weight. I said I wanted to get down to 135, and she was like, "You're not already there! That's what I would have guessed!" Crazy, eh?

Hon, did you really not eat all day? I don't want to come down on you, but that's not really that great for your metabolism. Maybe you could just snack on a few granola bars or power bars or something during the day so that you keep you cals low, but keep your metabolism running. I don't want you to starve yourself or plateau your weight loss! You're doing great, and I want to see continued success! Ok, I'll get off my mother soap box. Just be careful, ok?

Have a great day! :D

I love when people think your smaller or weigh less then you do, it makes my day. But I have been having "mood swings" lately like earlier I wrote that I felt awesome about myself, but the past couple days I have felt really bloated and fat, I don't really know what is wrong with me. But anyways, yesturday I didn't eat very well, but I did go to the gym for an hour...30 minutes on the elliptical actually at an intense level and then 20 minutes on the bike again with a good amount of resistance. I ate 2 poptarts (400 cals), some fries (350 cals) and some breadsticks and a couple snickers (mini) (about 1000?!?) so yesturday I was sort of high. Oh yea I had about 48 ounces of propel so that was like 60 cals too. But life goes on....I guess.

Today was awful. Work was awful. What I ate was awful. What I drank was awful. And I feel really awful! GEESSH! I just want today to end. Well my breakfast was about 250 cals and my lunch was about 600 cals (including some md) and I have not ate dinner yet, but I had some green beans 50 cals and I am going to eat like turkey on wheat and I know I am going to eat some cookies later....gosh...I hate myself the past few days...I need to stop eating!! Tomorrow...I am going to go back to lower cals....tomorrows cal goal = 1400! I know I can do it! I want to get to the gym tomorrow too, actually screw it...I am going to the gym NOW...even though I DONT want too!

Alright, well I got to the gym before it closed (spare 1 hour) I used the elliptical trainer for a half hour, I really did not want to go, so a half hour is better than nothing I guess, I am going to do pilates for 20 minutes later too, so I think I did fairly well with such a bad day, I am really hungry so when my mom gets home with groceries I am going to eat, but hopefully since I went to the gym, I won't feel like eating as much.

more uh...thinking? Today is just an awful day like I said before. For dinner I did have a small salad, bt then I had some mac and cheese and some cookies X-( , but really I ate WAY less then I thought I would I was under 2000 cals today so thats good. So...I know I cannot go without soda right now...work is so stressful and YES I do go to food/drink for comfort and to relieve stress..its sad, but true. There is no way to get around my stress so I just have to deal with it....it will always be there. So I am going to go back to just limiting myself instead of totally forbidding things.

Yuck, sorry you've been having some awful few days! I hope that this weekend is a little nicer to you. DOn't beat yourself up for a few bad things eaten. Just get back on track. WTG on getting to the gym. I SO did NOT want to go this morning, but I did anyway, and I feel better for it! Have a great weekend.

Thank you RickiJ I really appreciate the "pick me up"~

Okay, today SUNDAY starts a new week. A good week. Seriously I did not make my goal once again, I am not too upset, but it does sort of disappoint me, but obviously who wouldn't be? Well I am going to "kick" it into Highest gear the next three weeks. I really really really want to look my best for my cousins wedding (people who havent seen me since I've lost 30 pounds) and for school. I am going to fit in exercise everyday, I have too, or the scale is not going to budge. I am going to try TRY and go this whole week without soda, I should lose a pound right there! I am going to try and eat salads before meals when I can to fill myself up with veggies or if not salad green beans. I am going to drink at LEAST 72 ounces of water per day and I am not going to let myself indulge in any greasy, chocolatey, tastey (lol) *jk, but you know what I mean. I am going to allow myself to eat things like that on Friday only, but since saturday is going to be my weigh in day, I would not be smart for me to, so :(
hopefully I won't really eat much at all. Here I go....I hope this week is awesome! Tomorrow I go shopping then its another 6 days of work. Today is work unfortunately, but I will survive once again.... :(

Yay, another who is giving up soda. IT really isn't as hard as it sounds. Just the first three days are the hardest when you are trying to et it out of your system and the after the first time you make the choice between soda and another drinking it gets easier to turn it down.Another thing that is good your eating chances, because soda promises your body a certain amount of calories and when it doesn't get them from the soda your body tries to compensate, so since I have given it up I eat less then I did. Good luck to you this week!

Thanks Vulgarian20 you are the one who really inspired me to stop drinking soda as much!

Day 1-No SODA! whoa great stuff huh?
Breakfast-1 piece wheat bread (40 cal) w/ peanut butter (60 cal or less) = 100 cal
Lunch- Salad with cheese and croutons (150 cal) and fruit by the foot (80 cal) and propel (15 cal) = 245 cals
Dinner- some mac and cheese (350) chicken (100) = 450
795 + cookies....probably not a good thing to eat, but I gave in again...I dont know what to do with me!
Today is Sunday so the gym opens late and closes early so I couldn't go today because of work. Tomorrow is my day off and I am going shopping, so that is exercise right there, but if there is time I am going to get to the gym.

Day 2...hmmm..I did drink some soda last night...unfortunately, but when I get with my friends I tend to do that. I know excuses, but I guess it is just easier, but I did buy propel when I went shopping with my aunt when she bought soda, so thats good right? I did not eat too horrible yesturday either, I had some honey nut cherrios for breakfast (175 cal at most) and then subway (600 (soda..dang forgot about that)) and then I had some chex mix at night (400) so about 1175 yesturday I am guessing...not too shabby, definetly under 500 though so that is good. I didn't make it to the gym...agian not enough time! I hate me sometimes!

Day 3...today...again not too bad but not too good. Everything is always pretty good until I get home from work. I had honey nut cheerios for breakfast (175) and some milk so (120) and for lunch I had a fruit roll up, granola bar, and some chex mix (300 cals) I drank ice water too! NO soda at work GO ME! Then I came home and I had ONE piece of pizza and some fried things from the chinese place (800 cals) and soda ohhh.....200 cals? So total that is quite a bit...I know...I regret it but all well, not that much, so 1595 for today, that isn't too bad. But I know my weakness is certainly after work eating...gotta work on that...

Day 4..yesturday.. I have been SO busy lately it is hard for me to get to the computer everyday. But anyway I ate fairly bad yesturday. Mac and Cheese, 3 cookies, 3 buffalo wings, 1/2 serving fries with cheese, soda, and 2 pieces of pizza. HAHA that isn't fairly bad that is extremely bad looking at it, but all well yesturday was yesturday, today I mad up for it! Oh yea, the scale this morning, said 166 and lately actually it has been sitting around 178, so that is great news.

Day 5 TODAY I am proud of myself today, except for the soda.
2 Chewy bar 200 cal
1 fruit roll up 80 cal
mt.dew 275 cal
cherry coke 100 cal
salad 175 cal (olive oil)
chicken sandwich (40 cal bread, no mayo/sauce) 150 cal
3 cookies 160
=1140 calories

I really really need to start exercising, but work is just work...ah...excuses...nice

Anyway next monday I am going to try and being exercising 5x per week and I am taking some time of work, well I will probably only work around 2 days next week if I can get the other days off.

GOAL FOR NEXT WEEK
Monday
run 1 mile
walk 1 mile
30 min elliptical/bike

Tuesday
run 1 mile
walk 2 mile
10 minute stair stepper

Wednesday
run 1 mile
walk 1 mile
30 min ell/nike

Thursday
run 2 miles
walk 1 miles

Friday
run 2 miles
walk 2 miles

sound good to get my back in the groove? Well hopefully....

So work has sucked a ton lately, but ya know what it doesn't matter because today I might have lost my best friend ever, like seriously living without being able to talk to her is hard...it is too long of a story to explain on here, but I probably won't be around here for awhile, I am not sure if I am going to be doing a lot of sleeping and eating or just sleeping, but truthfully I dont really care right now...as I see it, life it literally over.

You never lose the friends that truely matter. I have moved all over the country and have manage to stay friends with my best friend for 10 years now. You'll find a way to stay in touch with your friend if they mean so much to you. Your doing good, dont give up now.

So I have tried my best today not to take up either habit (of eating or not eating). I did eat really bad since really I dont care much at the moment, but I don't feel like eating. I didn't eat anything for breakfast I still felt nauseous from last night. I did however stop and get a mt.dew, then at work a friend convinced me that I have to eat something so I had some fries and shared a mt.dew with her. Still not feeling the best, but trying my hardest to get my mind of things. I went to sleep as soon as I got home from work...no time to eat....the sleep was nice, but then I work up around 11 (now), and I decided to eat my sister's leftover pizza, I had to slices, probably about 400 calories worth and some milk. Today I was most likely over 1,000, mostly becuse of the mt.dew, but I am not starving, so I am happy with myself and I am not overeating, and I am proud of myself for that, oh yea I had a brownie too, forgot about that, so tomorrow I am going to try and eat "healthier", but still it will be hard to eat much. I will probably bring a chewy bar and fruit roll up to work and try to drink more water and less pop, limit myself to 1 tomorrow. So...here I go, life is certainly going on......

Vulgarian...thank you, but it makes me so sad thinking that she might not be my best friend for ever...it's good to know that you stayed friends even after you moved away.

Feeling much better today (I got a ton of sleep)
Breakfast
2 pieces wheat bread (40 cal. each.) 80 cal total
1 granola bar 100 cal.
milk 120 cal
300 calorie breakfast

Well today didn't go as planned, but tomorrow starts a new day, and sort of a new week. I start my exercise program...yippeee...lol...right. Tomorrows a big one with 1 mile run 1 mile walk and 30 minutes on the elliptical or bike. I am going to the beach tomorrow (day off) so I am most likely going to try and go in the morning, but if I can't I am sure that I will be home in time to go. I will certainly make sure of that. So here I go again....

hey!

dont you think that its funny how both of us get stuck on the diets at the same time? or that both of us are having problems with our best friends? I think that we need to double up on this diet plan thing, I just dont know how.

It is sort of hard online...you know to "diet" together. But hey whatever I'll try. That's really all you can do right? How about we set a goal for each day (calories) and exercise. I mean if you want. We can get even more detailed too. Actually that would be a good idea because then we would know that someone does actually care what we eat, well besides ourselves, because truthfullY I am always making excuses for myself, like "oh, I've had a bad day, I can eat some fries" or something like that, and that really needs to stop I know. So if your up for I am....want to keep it in our journals? We can just post back in forth between the 2...you know what I mean? Because you can only have so many of those PM things...its up to you. So let me know. Today, since it is my day off I am going for 1200 calores and 1 mile run 1 mile walk and 30 minutes elliptical.

Breakfast
1 100 cal chewy bar

I am going to the beach so I don't want to eat much...lol, enjoy you day!
Oh yea sorry about your problems with your friend, I do really know that it sucks whatever happens between you that you don't talk for awhile, it really really sucks. :(

My breakfast/lunch was a slice of cheesecake

when I got home from the beach I had a turkey sandwich on 2 pieces of 40 cal wheat bread so about 150 cal there, then later at the movies with a friend I had 1 piece of laffy taffy (150 cal?) and cheese it's (500 cal? I had that 99 cent bag) Who knows really. I did drink some mt. dew today and I had some mashed potatoes (150 cal) and green beans (40 cal) oh yea and some of someones pizza (250 cal) well that is more than I though.....I think I was around 1500 calories today, I felt like I ate alright, I don't feel guilty at all. I did get to the gym and did my exercise for the day, that felt great! I didn't want to be there, but I certainly was. I really want an ipod to I might go get one of those when I get paid of friday...maybe there are like 200 dollars though and I need some new running shoes....ah I love spending money, but running out sucks...!

Hey Kelsey, want to set some "guidelines"? Not really any rules, but things we should try and stay away from and things we should get?
Some ideas: a lot of water 64 oz. each day this week
exercise 4 days good to start?
1400 cal aim for the day
no more than 1800 and no less than 1000

Does that sound alright? Any others you want to add, anything you want to change?

That sounds good but I think that I am aiming for more like 1200-1300 cals. Oh, and as for the water.. how about 1 liter of water before drinking a cup of soda (diet for me) I think that I eat more junk food when I drink soda. Oh! and try this... drink your dew out of a small sippy straw such as one used to stir coffee, You get much more bubbles in that way and get satisfied on the soda a lot faster.

Is there anyway you want to distribute your cals? I'm trying to do 800 at work and then 400 after work. Good luck!

That is a good idea about the soda, but usually I drink it at work, but if I do drink it at home from the the store I'll make sure to get a coffee straw! I really need to work on eating less for dinner, that is my biggest meal and that is supposed to be the smallest! But I am not a breakfast person, literally it's hard for me to eat much because I get sick to my stomach, so maybe I'll start eating a bigger lunch, especially since I will be exercising in the late afternoon once school starts.

oh yea, guess what!?!?! I was at 165.5 this morning...how great!

That is great news run! Keep it up! 165 is just around the corner!! :)

Okay, well this is odd, but this morning I was at 164, like I am sure some has to be water weight, but I haven't been eating much and I have been exercising more because I am in such a great mood, it's wierd that you get so happy/excited that you literally cannot eat, like I have to force myself to eat lately, it's crazy, but I am NOT going to complain.

Heck yeah on the 164! update your weight on the profile thing!

163 as of today! WHoa....I don't know what is up with me, but I like it! :D I think it is from not eating much though, yesturday I only ate fries! Geesh, I thought I ate something else, but I didn't I drank a bunch of bad stuff tho......So...calories there, today I am going to work on feeling better so I am going to eat something...write again later!

Omg! you are only 13 pounds from your goal! So exciting.

I've had some tough diet days but today was good so we'll see what the scale says tomorrow

Congrats again!

Yee HAW! WOO HOO! Congrats girl! :)

:1stprize:

Well this weekend has been pretty crazy/great/not so great. Well since last week I have gotten down to 162, which is amazing, but I think that is because my depo is wearing off and I am was supposed to get another shot like a week ago, but I stopped because of weight gain, and I am losing again which is great news. Also, I have been soo busy and nervous that I have not ate much at all lately, but I have been drinking a ton of mt.dew, but really I don't care right now, I am just trying to enjoy my last 2 weeks of summer, seriously, enjoying them. Well hopefully everyone else is enjoying themselves too, good luck and have fun,
will write again sometime soon.

Oh, only 2 weeks left? that sucks. Man.. you are on a freaking roll. 162 is great! keep it up and you will be at 150 in no time.

I have been eating awful lately, dont really want to talk about it, but I am having fun, so that is good. But starting tomorrow not so much junk!

IM BACK

Well the past couple weeks have been the time of my life. Seriously, it was awesome. But my eating and drinking habits have went down the toilet. I eat whatever whenever somedays and nothing at all the next, who has time to eat healthy?! Well I DO starting right this second. Right NOW! I always say these things, but seriously. I was doing so well, I am not going to let myself go again! I WONT! So....I have been feeling really fat lately, I have actually only gained about a pound and a half, but I feel like I've gained 10! So I am not going to eat as much anymore and I am going to start calorie counting again. I mean I know the calories of just about everything by heart, but I need to start consuming more protein and less fat and carbs, well the bad ones anyway. So tomorrow the plan is to eat a ton of green beans...LOVE THEM! So that shouldn't be a problem, one problem though is that we don't have any more of that 0 cal spray butter, so I have to use reg. , but maybe I'll try and go without. So I have class at 9 tomorrow morning, and thinking that I will get up last minute I wont eat anything until I get home at noon, I am going to the gym straight after class and exercising on an empty stomach is how I like to do it, then I will come home and eat my beans (protein...very good after a workout...or so I have been told) and that will add up to around 75 calories. I will be drinking a bunch of water too. Later if I get hungry I will figure out something else low cal maybe around 400 calories for my late afternoon meal and then some more beans for dinner, keeping my cals relatively low, only to get my eating habits back to normal. Or at least better than right now. Hmm....I don't think I am forgetting anything right now, not that I can think of....but I LOVE SHOPPING! LOL Have fun and I will be writting again soon.

So so much stuff has like came up in the past 2 days it's so stressful! Anyway I haven't been eating a ton, just not too great. Yesturday I had green beans and red potatoes 300 cals and some frosted flakes 300 cals and then some raviolli and licorice 600 cals so yesturday wasn't too horibble but today I had fast food...it was not a cool thing.

hey runshot!

where are you? you only have 12 pounds to go.. that rocks!

Ah, back to school...started yesturday. Gives me even more motivation to get back on track...which I have! Yesturday a friend and I started our trek to get into great shape. She is 120 lbs. so losing weight isn't the point for her, but to actually gain muscle and get into great shape. I too want to be in excellent shape, but losing weight is sort of part of the reason for doing it. We do have running goals and our ultimate goal is to be able to run long distance track this coming spring. We hope to get our mile down to 5:45 by then and hopefully by Christmas it will be around 7:00 because right now we are both running about a 10:00 mile on a good day! lol So yesturday we ran a 1/2 mile, walked a 1/2 mile, did 30 decent minutes on the elliptical trainer and did some awesome lower body strength training, I hurt today, it's a great feeling I have not felt in awhile. I am not going to record my weight until Saturday. I will be back later today to write about todays gym time! BBL.... Thanks for stopping by Kelsey, I will be visiting your journal later tonight!!!!!

Today...hmmm....I did pretty well!
Ate:
Boiled Chicken and red potatoes 400 calories (lunch)
Roast Beef, 1 cup mac and cheese, and green beans 500 calories (dinner)
1 ho ho 130 cals (pretty sure)
Total: 1130

Drank:
Chocolate Milk (I know bad, but the protein is 8g per serving!!!)400 cals yuck!
Mt.dew 250 cals
total 650

Total total 1780

I realize today would have been much better without the chocolate milk, certainly, but it was my breakfast. I am going to try my best tomorrow to drink more water, ironically right now I am watching The Biggest Loser[I] that entertains me...lol. I love watching those kind of shows...oh like [I]Celebrity Fit Club! Anyway, totally off track I know....so tomorrow I am going to drink more water.

Exercise:
20 minutes on the stairstepper (great for me! that thing is hard!)
1/2 mile run 1/2 mile walk
25 minute ab class
some arm work...not nearly enough, but I am doing 100 push-ups tonight in increments of 10.

12 more pounds before I take my after picture!

I had an original goal to be to 150 by the end of September, but things have not work exactly as planned, but no biggy, I can still do it, but I am making my ultimate 150 pound goal Halloween! I know I am going to make this goal...definitely! Once 150 rolls around...I am going to rethink my goal, but until then I am almost there!

Wow, you and I are both 12 lbs from goal! You're doing awesome. Look at how far you've come! I bet you get lots of nice compliments, and I bet you had to throw out a bunch of clothes!!!

Actually I have had to give away 95% of my old clothes! It feels great...but I didn't have much to wear and had to spend $1000 for new clothes for school! But i figure even when I do lose those pesky 12 lbs I will still be able to wear these clothes...I will just look better! And if not...well I go shopping again!! Good luck on those 12 pounds of yours too...hopefully you have not been platued as long as I have....

Today was uh....hell...at the gym...it feels good MENTALLY that I did it, but my body is aching! AH~ Already sore from Monday and Tuesday my friend and I did a boot camp today.....1 hour of push ups, sprints, lunges, more sprints, more pushups AH! It was insanely hard, but I made it, but tomorrow I am going to take it easy with some swimming and no lifting at all, I need to repair a little....

Today I ate...alright. I did have my mt.dew (just cant seem to go without no matter how hard i try) 250 cals, some roast beef (some in the morning and dinner) 500 cals (at most, I am not sure how much roast beef has) I did also eat 6 pizza rolls for lunch350 cals? Well something like that. So total today I had about 1100 calories+ 1 cup of milk 150 cals (more than 8 oz) 1250 cals....later tonight i may eat some green beans...most likely so I am going to end today at around 1325 calories. NOt too bad. Today I did drink more water too (because of that class at the gym). I feel good about myself though, I feel like I am treating myself better. I am trying to get more protein so I gain more muscle faster, because unlike most girls, I do want to be ripped at some point and I don't mind if I have muscular arms (just not huge ...you know what i mean...) Have fun everyone! Be Back tomorrow....I need sleep!

Ah so I feel horrible today! I think it is the rapid change in weather...yuck! My body aches sooooo much too! Geesh, so didn't want to get out of bed today, but I did. I did not however get to the gym, I chose not to today, I need to recover a bit and hopefully my cold goes away. Tomorrow I am back at it though, but I think we are going to keep it simple with something like swimming or elliptical...something along those lines, and then to make up for today I am going to try and go on Saturday as well. Today I ate....alright. I drank a little too much mt.dew...I had about 400 calories for lunch and about 600 calories for a very early dinner. So today I was probbaly around 1500 calories.....at the moment I dont seem to care...thats sort of bad I know.

I have decided not to record my weight this Saturday, because the scale hasn't budged yet...and it will just be sad, so to keep me slightly motivated I am going to hope for a big loss next Saturday, I think I am retaining water, who knows though, I know I am not eating more, and I am exercising so what is going on? Next week I will find out if something is really wrong with my diet or if it is just because I just started exercising again.

I didn't exercise all the days that I wanted to well because I came down with a cold...which really sucks! Plus I was SO sore that walking and sitting was painful! IT was a great feeling though! I did however get 3 great days in last week, which I am proud of, this week I will hopefully get another 3 intense days and maybe 2 relaxed days on the elliptical or something just to burn those extra cals. I think I took the first week at full speed and I should have eased into it, especially since I am so out of shape again. All well it will work out.

I haven't been eating too much this weekend, which I am proud of I have probably been around 1200-1500 calories Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Which is very good, espeicially for the weekend!

Okay well before I did not want to admit it, but I had creeped by up to 165ish, and today I got on the scale...even though I said I didnt want to yet, and it was 163, so that is actually a loss for this week, I just don't want to think that I gained any so I didn't want to count it as a loss, but I think I need to to stay motivated. By this weekend I am hoping to see 160 for the first time in about 3 years. It will be an amazing feeling I know. Being in the 150's!?! Come on...I gotta get there...I just have to! I am going to work hard, harder, drink less soda and more water dangit! I have to to get there and I really want to be there! For me! So my goal for 159 is October 1st! Hopefully I get there!

Oh yea...been shopping lately...totally wearing 9's now! Not just 1 pair!

So this week...hmmm...wasn't too bad. I exercised every day this week, except Friday, which is awesome. Some days were more intense than others, like Thursday and today, but I got something in on those other days so thats good. I have not been eating a ton, but I have been eating too much and things that aren't that great for me...so I need to stop that again. I will though. I am trying to get back into the "groove" of things, it's hard. I am always SO tired, like extremely, it's hard to handle. I sleep a lot, but the past few days I have just went straight to the gym when I was getting ready to go take a nap, some days i would sleep afterwards, but at least I did something. I think it is just the transition going back to school and the hours right now, so hopefully it passes soon. A friend of mine come home for the weekend in 2 weeks, I am so excited I haven't seen him in a month!! AH! So these next 2 weeks I am going to make intense for myself so I look extra great! Hopfully that will get me down to around 157 or so too! I'm trying!

Good luck! I know that you can do it. Just remember to enjoy yourself too!

Way to be extra intense huh? No, i am going to try and get some more exercise in tonight, but I made it to the gym...I only did 20 minutes on the elliptical and 5 on the stair stepper. I did some weight training (arms) too, but that probably took me about 15 minutes or so. So I really didn't do a whole lot, but it was good for a Sunday, at least I got there. This is really wierd, but lately I have been super tired, all the time. Like groggy even after I have slept for a good amount of time. It is driving me crazy! Hopefully, I get over whatever I have soon! I think it could be mono. I dunno though, I think I am going to the doctors to get checked out soon, hopefully! Anway, do far today I have ate a lunchable (250 cals...great thing to let you know) and a peanut butter cookie 200 cals? I did have some chocolate milk too, so like 400 altogether there, I am going to only drink water for the rest of the day so I won't add anymore unneccessary calories. I think we are having chicken or something for dinner so I shouldn't go over 1500 calories, especially with drinking only water.

I haven't made a good plan out and stuck to it in a long time, and I think that is slowing down my weight loss. I mean I only have like 12 pounds to go...they shouldn't be THAT hard! So I am going to make a good plan for everyday and I am going to try and do this every week so that way I don't have to make of the moment choices because it is so much harder to chose the right thing on the spot.

Monday breakfast...dont usually eat, don't have time,, but I'll try and eat 1 piece 40 cal break with 1 tsp peanut butter 120 calsish (because of the pb) water
lunch- lunchable & water 250 cals
Dinner- not completely sure but under 500 calories.
snack-green beans, fruit, something healthy with calories under 150.
Total Goal- Under 1100 calories

Goal exercise:
1 hour Boot Camp
30 minute machine (elliptical, tredmill, stairstepper, or bike)

I like your plan.. seems like fun. Oh, and 30 minutes on a machine is like 350 cals anyways, right??

Well I think I am still going to be at around 1100 calories, but I didn't eat exactly as planned. I did have a lunchable for breakfast/lunch. Then later I had some chips with cheese (250) and a couple chocolates 150 cals so that is 750 for the day and it leaves me with 350 calories for dinner, and I am having mac and cheese, so actually I might be more around 1200, but I am okay with that.

Oh yea and exercise...well..ummm....I made it to the gym, but I did not go to school and I wasn't feeling very well at all so I got in about 1 hour of requetball, not too shabby. Oh and I went to the doctors, told her how I have been feeling and she said I was depressed, gave me some meds and sent me on my way, I have had a history of depression, and it runs in the family, so it could be, but I don't like to admit it. I am taking something so if I seem to be feeling better than I will stick with it. I made sure to let her know I wouldnt continue taking it if I gained weight and she said if anyhting I could lose, so great right?! Hopefully I feel better.....

Cheer up chica, you're doing great. You've lost a ton of weight, are almost to your goal. You've learned better portion control so that you can eat the foods you love with careful planning. AND there is NO mention of mountain dew in your last entry. Sounds to me like you're doing fine! But why not watch a happy movie or something? Legally Blonde always cheers me up!

Legally Blonde is seriously a great movie, my sister is obsessed! Thanks for so great! Makes ya feel better when people are like that.

Today I have had 2 1 inch cinnamon rolls....so not even one decent sized one, so probably at about 300 calories. I am not eating until tonight because I am going to my friends house later and her mom makes the best chicken wings! Seriously, I'm excited, and thats sad, that i am excited about food...lol. Anyway, my friend comes home this weekend, but this guy that I met just recently wants to hang out and he's really cool too, so I really don't know it's going to be a tough decision, but either way I want to look great, who doesn't? So I am going to keep the exercise up, like seriously I have been running fairly consistently and it makes me feel good, lke I can go 10 mintes at 5.5 and not want to keel over. I am building up some endurance finally! I think I am going to go today although I am still sick from last night, but who cares its my fault and I need to just deal with it and exercise still! I have not lost weight, well I mean the scale isn't moving at all, but really I feel good, like I feel like my clothes are fitting better, who knows somethings up, I think I need to eat less salt and drink more water, but that doesn't mean that I will you know? Like lately I have been satisfied with the way that I look, so I don't have that motivation anymore, who knows...I know that I am still overweight, but it's not that sad I guess, like I don't think that I am fat, just overweight, I dunno its hard to explain....Anyway I will probably be back later to just write....its nice.

Hmmm....went to the gym yseturday but didnt do much more than walking and sat on the bike total of 50 minutes...I guess that isn't too bad for being hung over. Anyway, so today we are going to play football for a couple of hours then off to the gym hopefully for an hour before it closes. I plan on running today, I need to and want to, I just feel better when I do. I am so excited for the weekend I just want this week to go by super fast! It's going to be crazy! Anyway, so today so far I have ate about 400 calories worth of cereal and milk, not too bad, but certainly not great, but I am not eating anything else until dinner....we are having steak I think! whoa...nice~!

haha hung over, lol. good job on just making it to the gym. I'm just too lazy and I get results without it anyways to motivate myself.

hey! where the heck are you? doing homework and partying?

Well I am finally back! Oh it feels good. I really felt lost without diettalk. Fortunately I did manage to lose about 2 pounds while gone, but that was about a month and half...not so good. But I did survive Thanksgiving, actually I did not eat much at all, the food sort of sucked :( But a good thing for me! I have toned down on the partying and drinking and all those bad things, but good news...I have a boyfriend! Whoa...big big self esteem boost, but he's away right till Christmas, which really sucks. But that gives me about a month to look awesome for him...well of course me too, but that gives me more motivation, because I know he likes me for who I am now, but I think he deserves something a bit better, because uh...hes hot. lol. So I have been eating better the past couple weeks, mostly because I am so happy that I do not feel like eating and only eat when my stomach growls, usually. But oh my I had this horrible break down a few weeks ago, crying hysterically and the only thing that helped me was food, seriously once I started eating I stopped crying, that was sad. That was the point in which i decided to change my ways again. I eat green beans almost religiously again, but not as much as I should. I have started to eat breakfast, which allows me to skip lunch sometimes, because I am still full, but I only eat 1 small bowl of cereal (about 200 cals) which saves me cals in the afternoon and money! So double win! School is still very stressful and I have sent in most of my applications, I am waiting on my 1st choice still, hopefully I have that by Christmas, I will seriously fall apart if I dont get in though, I should, and I want to incredibly bad, but who knows....:-/ Scary sad thoughts...bad. On to a better subject, I have started tanning for a dance coming up, so of course, more slim looking advantages to being tan, although I realize it is bad for you, sometimes we do things that are... Also, I have been working out about 30 minutes 4 times a week, not nearly enough as I should, but I am usually working 5 days a week for 4 or 5 hours after school so that leaves me about an hour before work to do homework and get ready for work, and then I have about 45 minutes after work before the gym closes, so that is usually when I go. So I think that is a good summary of what has been going on....I think anyway. I still feel awful about myself, which is sad, I just have to get over that I am never going to be a size 3, but maybe a 5 someday! lets hope....I'm around a 9 now. My family tells me almost everyday how beautiful I am now, which makes me feel a bit better, but also makes me wonder what they would say if I lost another 20 pounds...hmmm...

Today:
I at a bowl of cereal for breakfast, nothing for lunch (oh but Mt.D Yes still addicted) and then came home and had another small bowl of cereal, which should hold me until dinner at around 7 or 8, I am eating later now so that I dont snack at night. I am heading to the gym in about 10 minutes, going to aim for an hour, but I get so bored lately, but I intend to TRY. It feels so go to write in here again! I miss it! Anyway so my calories for today are at about 280+200+200=680 not too shabby.....

hi run...welcome back....you were really missed...things are much easier for me when i m here too....its so good to be with so many wonderful and helpful people...
wish you enjoyed the gym today...

Welcome back! :wave: Yay on hottie bf!!

So, I haven't had time to post, which seriously sucks, but here i am. I go to school plus I am working between 30-40 hours a week! I try and get as much sleep as I can, but between the lack of sleep and fast food, the pounds aren't coming off! I literally don't have the time to exercise, let alone, any motivation to do so. I could get up a couple hours earlier, but really that I am not a morning person and at this point I only get between 5-7 hours of sleep most days. I am still quite stressed and now I am really sad because hello, my almost bf is not even here. I have no idea what he is doing and he doesn't call as much as he should...gosh...guys...alrighty its depressing, but thinking about him has made me realize that I like him alot, so this is good, I usually find the bad things and make myself not like someone because I am afraid of commitment, but this time...I think its different, but with my luck he will decide that he doesn't like me all too much! Ah confusing...saddening....stressul! GEESH! ANyway back to the food thing...um...I have started to eat breakfast, which I think is good, I am not really all that hungry for lunch now, and usually I dont eat, just drink a bottle of MD, which is SO good, it keeps me going (the caffeine), its great. ANyway, then sometimes I come home and have a small snack before work, but sometiems not, then I work get home about 9 and then eat, shower, homework, then sleep. what fun.....

Oh i just wanted to add that I will be posting some pics of me sort of before and after...just for a few days...once I get my dance pictures back...which wont be for a few weeks, but still...its sort of exciting!

So my dance is in a few days...what fun! I am feeling like total crap because of the flu....well thats what it seems to be as of yet. It really sucks! Can barely move! Swallowing kills me...even my own saliva! EW...it hurts. WEll that means I cannot stand eating much more than soup...which sort of numbs with the heat...but yeah me loaded up on Nyquil and other fever reducer/ sore throat stuff...very fun. Oh i did get my dress in the mail Yesturday...I showed my sis today and she said looked like a size 5! She may be lying...but she usually doesn't.

I hope you feel better soon! That sucks to be sick!

Wow! Size 5!!! I would love to look like a 5!!! Good luck with your dance! :)

Hey! size 5 sounds nice. I hope you have fun at the dance! I'm really looking forward to seeing the pictures!

:bd Runshot
I feel so old you're 17 and I'm 19 I wish I was 17 again but I guess you have to get older. But girl don't fret over some weight going up and the scale is not always right you need to focus on how much body fat you have if you have those type of scales that measures the body fat and weight than thats perfect. But Runshot you should be not doubting yourself because you need to be strong about this.

Well the goal that I want to get to is 150 because that would be crazy if I could get that far without eating fatty foods which is why I got this way. I just did 20 mins on the Stationary bike and I'm so hungry because I had some Chinese Food about 11:00am and I had my Breakfast at 9am which was just some Tea with a Banana. I'm really trying to loose this weight. I wanted to know how do you change the ticker when you've lost because right now its says 30lbs gained and I don't know how to say 2lbs lost or something like that.

Well Good luck Runshot

I'm not sure how to change that ticker thing...that's probably why I don't have one..lol..not really too computer literate. sorry!

But although being sick sucks...they found out it wasn't the flu...tested for strep...nope not that...tested for mono (thank god it wasn't that) and came up with a viral infection, don't really know if that is good or bad, but it sure feels horrible. Oh yea back to my point....I lost like 4 pounds over the past 4 days...awesome I know...hopefully it stays off...I can sort of eat again, but my stomach won't really allow me to either, but I did get to eat a strawberry shake today, but only because it numbs my throat enough, but its good too! OF course....I used fat free milk! lol

Thanks RikkiJ and Kelsey for the wishes...I guess thats what you could call them right? You guys are great...really...I remember you from the beginning! You've helped a ton!

A Viral infection! Ick! Feel better, K?

Have a great weekend! TGIF!

P.S. I secretly love being sick cause I lose weight! If I'm careful, it does tend to stay off. Most of it anyway! :laugh:

I am feeling much better, still have have sore throat and I am a little achy, but I have been resting.

The dance was fun. I looked ah...AWESOME. Seriously, I felt gorgeous, but unfortunately I couldn't share that with the only one that I think matters, but I did get to see him that night, only after I had changed. Boys...things are going better. I should have some pics up here this week I am going to upload them when i get time. I'll make sure to get a before up here too. One thing I did notice is that my arms are fat. Like they are unproportional to the rest of me. I decided that starting today I am going to weight train and focus on my arms.

This weekend and this morning I realized my clothes fit better than ever. Things that were tight before are loose, it's great. So even though I haven't been losing as much now, maybe by some miracle I have been toning up, but I haven't really been exercising much, unfortunately because of my schedule and lack of motivation. School gets out in 2 days so that means I have plenty of time to exercise. I am going to make this break crazy fun, but I am also going to commit 1 entire hour to cardio everyday and 30 minutes of strength training 3/4 times for the next two weeks. Hopefully, this dedication will put me in the mood to continue the exercise once school starts back up.

Horrible thing happened this weekend, my mom got a new scale and gave someone else my new best friend! I was just starting to enjoy the scale and my mom gets a new one. Of course this one is digital with a body fat analyzer...how depressing! I did a quick weigh in today, convinced myself it must be wrong and decided I'll try again tomorrow....geesh depressing. But anyway if I can get myself down to 154 on this new scale by Christmas, which is the goal, then I am going to try and get to 150 by the time I go back to school, which I think is the 3rd or something. I know that would probably take a miracle, especially with Christmas dinner and everything, but I have some faith in myself. And if I don't do it, I will just give myself another week, but how great would it be to get to my goal weight before the year ends? Of course I have decided on a new goal weight, but I am not going to think about that until I make it to 150, but I think I am going to aim for 135-140 as my final weight. I think i would feel good there. Hopefully.

sorry you are not feeling well and hope you get well soon...is it a wonderful feeling when we re satisfied with the way we look....i wish i reach there one day...and you enjoy it ,you deserve it after all the long way you went through...you ll soon be at your goal weight...

Totally kicked ass at the gym, pardon my French. Seriously, well for not being there in almost 2 weeks. I did 20 tough minutes on the elliptical, 30 minutes 15 run 15 walk on the tredmill and about 12 minutes on the stair stepper (my worst enemy..lol) Then I dropped my cd player and it broke and I cannot exercise without music! Adding to that I did about 20 minutes of strength training, although i didn't do too much for my arms, tomorrow is another day though. I have to work tomorrow, but I think I am going to go afterwards, for HOPEFULLY at least an hour, gotta get that new scale back down! Geesh!

Nice seeing ya egyptrose!

I can't workout without music either! I had to get an MP3 player, and I HATE IT when I forget it. My first one actually got stolen at the gym. Grrrrrrr

Sounds like a great time at the gym! :) :lift: :sweat: Keep it up!

Today I didn't eat too much...actually thinking about it now I only had a bowl of cereal this morning and a glass of milk. I had a handful of cheetos, but not too shabby. I am incredibly hungry so I might eat something later tonight. My friend is stayin the night tonight...so no gym, I just got home from work so I couldn't earlier. All well though....lifes ya know...haha. Didn't feel like weighing myself earlier so i didn't!

So I ended up eating green beans, a low fat/low carb yogurt and some pancakes. Not too bad, but not great.

Alright, so im back again. Crazy stuff happening this week. I am going back to my green beans and diet and trying to count calories, well a rough count anyway.

Breakfast: 1 cup fruit loops/ 1 cup milk 240 calories
Lunch: nothing (still feeling a little sick to eat alot)
Dinner: Speghetti 1/3 cup sauce 80 cals
noodles 220 cals meat 150 cals? total dinner: 450
total day: 690
I realize that is not good, but I can't eat too much, I am still not feeling well. I will weigh in tomorrow morning.
I go on a date with this guy I met through a friend, I have only been talking to him on the phone, I am scared that he will think I am fat, seriously scared, I mean I know I am pretty, but I am still a little fat, hopefully he doesn't think so, or I'll be super crushed. I still sort of have a realationship with that other guy, but we aren't as serious as I would like us to be, so I am looking at other options...hopefully things turn out well.

Hope the date goes well. When is it?

I hope you start to feeling better too, and you get your appetite back. You've been sick a long time!

Have a great day!

Hey!

I hope you get better soon! date huh, lol..

Well so...instead of actually going out I just went over to his house. He told me I was "cute" and that I "looked good" and other nice things like that. Seriously, made me feel super good about myself. We are going to hang out again, but we are going to take it slow as friends, he is a little older, so we don't want to jump into things. Which is good because that is what i always do and it ruins relationships fast. We are going to start working out together...how wierd! Hes pretty hot, alittle shorter than I usually go for, but he is really nice and dresses nice, so we'll see. Tomorrow I go out with tim, well as far as I know of, I haven't talked to him since earlier this week, and he likes to "forget" about things like that, but i'll find out.

still sick dangit! I did eat a bunch today though, it was really nice. I had a cinnamon roll and a glass of milk for breakfast (450 cals) lunch I had a bunch of pizza rolls (650 cals) and 1/2 a banana (50 cals) for dinner I had some greeen beans (70 cals) and some mac and cheese (350 cals) so today I hit about 1600 calories, which I don't like, but really I know that is excellent, I need to get my metabolism up agian. I did make it to the gym even today...nice I know...lol. I got in 30 minutes on the elliptical.

Hey!
glad you like the new boy. I really hope you get better soon! eat some garlic or something!
cute with a cold? heck yeah

haha...yea cute with a cold! geesh...that sounds even better hows it going with you kelse? I will have to head over to your journal and see how things are going...I need to catch up!

Today I made it to the gym...felt really crappy and i got a huge cramp...I never get cramps though, it was wierd, so it cut my time short. I did 30 mins on the elliptical and only 5 min on stair stepper.

I ate a lot again today, I am going to cut back and go healthy tomorrow for sure and sunday too hopefully. I ate a piece of toast for breakfast (40 cal bread with some butter 60 cals altogether) For lunch I had a hamburger and some fries/onion rings mix from BK, I decided on the hamburger for now on, i mean if I am going to eat fast food, I want to cut cals as much as I can even if it is just 40. (600 cals?) Later for dinnner I had some ravioli (420 cals) I drank some soda and milk today together probably around 400 cals...I know talk about empty cals, but whatever life will proceed. So rounding high I was at about 1800 ish, I know I snacked on other things too, I just cannot remember what.

I was in a depressed/relieved mood today. I decided to "break up" with tim. Although we aren't really going out, he hurts me and I can't take it, and I really don't deserve it, so I didn't call him tonight and I don't intend to ever again, eventually he will call me. Then...he will hear it. Can't wait. I just hope I really stick to it and not decide to give him another chance, because I have given him too many already. Well anyway to the point...so since I was feeling that way I decided that I needed a pick me up. I tried on a bunch of summer clothes and a bikini. I decided I look great. Well my stomach is pretty nice, well compared to before. I still despise my thighs, but that is what skirts and shorts are for, so slightly cover those up. But yeah a bunch of my clothes are too big again, clothes that were tight like 3 months ago! and I haven't even lost that much weight since then, must be toning up or something...who knows! But can't complain.

I decided that I want to lose 18 more pounds (well I want to weigh about 139) I talked to my dad about it today, he's been fairly supportive lately and always tells me that I'm beautiful and all that nice stuff, which is wierd for my dad, I think my mom put him up to it or something. But anyway, we made this type of "bet"/deal. He is going to try and lose 20 lbs and myself 18. If I can do that by April 15th he is going to take me summer clothes shopping, which I will certainly need by then if I do lose weight for sure since everything will be too big. And then if he also losing the weight he is going to go shopping too, but I dont have to pay..phew

I intend to get a good workout tomorrow at the gym, I think I am going to start running again, so i'm ready when I go work out with that guy...lol. I may also try track this year, just for fun and to get super fit for summer...maybe not tho, Im not that motivated...lol.

Well well well...worst night of my life. Found out that this guy I have been "dating" has a girlfriend. Ive been crying for the past few hours and cant sleep. I wonder how many cals crying burns? I hate guys. I haven't gone crazy and ate yet, I am trying not too, although it might make me feel btter at the moment, Ill hate myself even more later. But instead I am going to try super super hard for the next few weeks and when I see him again...ohh...he's gonna wish he had me, but nope NEVER stupid b@stard! Shoot me......I am so niave.

Not stupid or naieve. I went through the same thing. I met this guy at a conference and we had some good "dating" going on the whole time. We wrote a few letters after, but then he "casually" tells me about his girlfriend. Hello! Cheating bastard! I cried for a few days, but realized that I was better off without him. And guess what? I am! (That was years ago, though! Gosh, like 8! I feel so old! LOL).

IT'll pass. Guys are immature and stupid till you meet the right one.

Cool about going summer clothes shopping! Can't wait to hear you did it and get to go! :) Good luck! %%-

And here's a hug :hug: for the jerky crap you had to put up with.

Thanks a bunch. Guys are immature, everyone tells me they never grow up, depressing... Why do guys think they can do that though? really? It's rediculous. I'll get over it, eventually.

Haven't been in the mood to eat today, I am starving but the thought of food makes me sick, I might eat some green beans and maybe some of what my mom cooks for dinner I think taco salad, I'm not sure though.

I slept all day today, but when I did get up I went to the gym within like 15 minutes of getting up! That is awesome. This is the 4th day in a row I've went! I'm trying to make a habit again and I don't dread it! I did 30 minutes on the elliptical and 1 mile/13 minutes (run/walk) on the treadmill.

Alright I decided to try and start training for track, its gonna be tough. But I have found some kind of motivation in myself. I don't really know where it is coming from, but I am tired of myself. I mean I have begun to love myself more physically, but as a person I want to slap me in the face andd tell me to wake up and do something good for yourself. So I am going to start eating really good again and exercising my butt off. I need a hobby and so I am going to see if running could be it. Wouldn't that be nice?

I am also setting a really big goal for weight loss this week. I am at 156.6 on our new scale as of this afternoon. By next Sunday I am planning on weighing 153, that is a 3.6 weight loss in 7 days. I realize that is not always a good thing to do, but I need another jump start and I have been only losing like 1/2 pound a week and i am sick of doing this half@$$ so I am changing. Maybe leaving this guy will have a good effect on me, at the moment I feel guilty, but like I said that is why i have to change. So here I go!

I ended up having some green beans (50 cals) and some taco salad (not really a salad with doritos, cheese, taco meat, and some lettuce...lol) approx cal. for the day 800-1000 including a glass of milk and some mt.dew

Hey!
Ick.. I'm sorry about the boy situation. They are all losers (for the most part). I hope you like running.. new hobbies are always good. Good luck on your bet with your dad! You get those clothes!

lol, yeah, ran today, but only like 1.5 miles. I spent 30 minutes on the tredmill. I ate 2 pieces of 40 cal wheat bread for breakfast with pb and J (300 cals ...that bad pb) and then a glass of milk 130 cals. 430 altogether. Then later for dinner I ate 2 pb and j sandwiches (600 cals). I did also eat some cake..yuck Iknow (300 cals?) 1340 for the day? not too bad and I don't feel hungry at all.

I got hungry/bored and ate a pear, at least it was fruit....

So last night i added on 4 crackers and some cheese...I hate myself.

Today I've done fairly well.
Granola Bar 1/2 breakfast 1/2 lunch 250 cals?
1 pear 60 cals
1 pb and j sandiwich with 1 tbs. of pb and 1 of J (150 cal + 80 cal for bread = 230 cals)
230+60+250 = 540 cal total for today that leaves
1200-540 = 660 cals for the rest of the day.

chicka.. dont hate yourself. It was 4. I know someone who eats a block of cheese and a carton of crackers for dinner regularly (sick).

ps. Way to only eat 1tbs. So far today I've had 3 tbs of pb. 55% of the calories I've had so far are from it..

EWWWW! A block of cheese and a box of crackers!!! EWWWWW! :hijacked: over

I'm just reiterating what Kels said. No hating yourself!

And pears are SO Good this year for some reason. I am loving them! :)

Hope you have a great evening.

Pears definitely super good lately I have to agree, perfectly soft and juicy! It's tough to appreciate yourself when you eat and can't really stop, well in a way... Hearing what others eat sometimes make you feel better about youself, although it shouldn't, but thanks anyway Kelsey...lol.

Hmmm....I found out some more info on what I thought was the truth about that guy. I feel horrible so I called him today and he acted like it was all good, but I dunno we didn't talk too long and he said that he would call back and so far...he hasn't but he has never been good with that, so hopefully later tonight he will. I am going to dinner with a friend, so thats exciting it's my fav restuarant! We are sharing a meal which is good for cals and money! But they have free rolls and peanuts...ah! geesh.

Ate so far today: Won tons (no idea on the cals, probably 500 or so)?

have fun eating out! what restaurant?

It was Logans and the food was really good.

I have been eating like crazy the past few days...I think it's because TOM is coming, but still I usually don't feel like eating this much, the thing is I'm not really hungry I am just eating and I am not really bored either because I have sooo much to do, maybe its stress? Who knows, but I really need to get over it! I keep telling myself that I can eat because I'm going to the gym later or I telll myself that if I let myself eat this I have to work extra hard at the gym later, problem is...I dont and even if I did that would so defeat the purpose. I am not maintaining yet, although my mind seems to think so, I still have like 16 pounds to lose! Geesh! Well this week definitely won't be too beneficial, I'll be happy with a one pounds loss, but I still have two days. That is two days to lose a pounds maybe?? I may hit the gym twice tomorrow because I have some extra time between classes because I don't go to the college tomorrow! Oh yeah, usually I sleep, but I may try and burn some calories for an hour or so instead! How productive would that be! Oh yea! Maybe I will even go to my first hour in gym attire...that should get me there easier...either that or keep me comfy enough to go back to sleep....I guess I'll find out tomorrow. I am posting some pictures in the picture thing, I have finally worked up the courage to do so, but I am not going to keep them up too long.

Uh, did I miss the pictures? I'll trade you... I'm sort of curious about what you look like

I cant figure out how to get them on the comp but if you want PM me with your email and I'll send them as an attachment then you could just send me yours...that would be cool, I am curious as well.

Totally LOVING life right now. Well mostly. My old best friend called me up today, we have been not talking for about 6 months. We talked forever then ended up hanging out, it was incredible. LIke we were still best friends, I missed her so much, I am so happy we are cool again and tonight has been like the most fun night in a long time and we just did stupid stuff like old times. Anyway, so after hanging out with her I hung out with my guy friend, aw he's great again, but I dont know how long that will last, but I think he is going to be different now, but I can never tell. I hope so.

Well on to diet stuff. I didn't exercise at all today, but yesturday I went to the gym at 5:30 in the morning! Yahoo for me! lol It was really nice to get it out of the way early. Today I didn't eat too bad, maybe 1500 calories which is kind of what I was aiming for. I had 2 poptarts (400) 2 packs lunch meat (220) 1 gogurt (80) nuts (170) fruit (70) nutrigrain bar (130) and some apple juice total about 1400 cals or so

I am off to enjoy my happiness, probably sleeping...lol.

So I talked with a friend of mine today and we decided that we are going to do a type of "contest" I love contests they motivate so well. But we are going to see who, if either of us can lose 7 pounds in two weeks. I know that that is alittle extreme, but hey "go big or go home" right? She wanted to make it 10 pounds and I told her that was too crazy. So for the next two weeks (and hopefully after) I am going to cut way back and eat super healthy and work out at least 5x per week for 45 minutes a day. I am upping then my usual by 15 minutes, hopefully that will help to lose a little extra. I did get to the gym 4x last week though, that is pretty good for not having much time. I might start getting to the gym in the morning, but I'm not counting on that right now, just getting there is an accomplishment for me.

So far today I have ate poptarts (400) and a 20oz. cherry coke (200) 600 total
For dinner I am having roast beef, potatoes, and some other vegetable like green beans and maybe a salad or something I am guessing that will be at about 600 calories, at the MOST because I am going to just drink water. i don't intend to eat or drink anything else today.

um. ok.. I know that you love competitions and all (so do I, I cant lose) but be nice to yourself, ok? Going to the gym/ eating good foods is great, I just hope that you are taking care of yourself too... plus 7 pounds in 2 weeks (and so close to your goal weight) is a bit much. I've heard that you are supposed to lose the last few pounds slowly so that you can learn how much you need to eat to maintain and not gain/lose.

Good luck.. mm poptarts

I know i know....like seriously I don't really want to do it, but I am kind of doing it for her sake too. I dunno, I am not expecting to lose the weight, but why not try right?

So for dinner I didn't eat any potatoes...Yeah go me, and I had a bunch of green beans and then some roast beef so I did well. Also, a different friend of mine has the winsor pilates and we decided that we are going to do that everyday now. Which is super exciting, hopefully something good comes of it. There is like 6 different dvds 20 mins each so we are doing two a day and mixing it up good. So today we did the total body and the abs. Ouch...feels good though. We also did 50 situps and 50 push ups. Too much fun!

Well it's almost 4 in the afternoon and I just woke up an hour ago. I did however didn't go to sleep until about 5 am. That still is no excuse, but I really have any excuse to get up and I enjoyed just laying there thinking. Anyway I can feel those pilates from yesturday which is great news! Hopefully they will work then! I am going to do the winsor lower body and then total body slimming or something along those lines today. I am also going to head out to the gym in a few. I am going to make a goal now of 60 minutes since I did get so much rest I think I can handle it.

I only got in 40 minutes today...10 on the recumbent and 30 on the elliptical. I'm feeling good still. I am going to do a 20 minute pilate video, maybe even 2 of them, not sure yet I have a lot to do tonight still. So for dinner I had a baked potato 150 cals, 35 cals of green beans, probably like 100 cals of butter...ew...ew...ew, and about 250 cals worth of chicken breast.

150+35+100+250 = 535 + 100 for breakfast + 100 pepsi + 35 cals of croutons = 770 cals total for today

Hey! good job on the work out. Butter's good.. makes the potato taste better. You burned it off at the gym anyways

Yesturday I ate a bunch...way too much of way too much high calorie bad for you food. For breakfast I had 2 pancakes and a glass of milk, for lunch I had 500 cals worth of pizza, and for dinner I had 200 cal of vegetable soup, 200 cal cheese sandwich, and something else I don't remember but I know I was at about 1500 calories or so for yesturday .

Today hasn't been so bad yet. I had 2 glasses of fat free milk = 180 calories,8 pizza rolls 340 calories, and a small cinnamon roll about 200 calories so far today I am at 720 for the day. I think I going to have a chewy bar after the gym at 120 cals and then dinner, I am not sure what that is going to be but I will make sure to keep it under 500 calories.

well you know....I ate ice cream and a half a double cheeseburger and some fries...ew, I probably added like 1000 calories, but I was still under 2000. I guess whatever I don't feel like caring too much today, it's that TOM and my cramps are super duper bad. ah! I'm not too sure if I will be getting to the gym, but I might try. At the the gym yesturday though I did 10 min on the elliptical about 20 minutes of weight training and 15 minutes of running/walking on the track and a bunch of lunges that I know feel today. I want to tone my legs a bunch and I keep reading that lunges do wonders...so we'll see.

Today I had 1 chewy bar @ 120 calories

Later for lunch I had a 4 piece chicken with half the package of hot mustard actually only 200 calories, seriously shocked about that. Then just now for dinner I had progressive chicken noodle soup, the whole can, but still only 200 calories and piece of bread with some butter about 100 cals and a glass of milk about 120 cals
total for the day (well as long as I don't binge later tonight, but I am going to allow myself a chewy bar if I really insist) = 740 calories very nice...had to make up for yesturday!

I didn't get to the gym today, been studying for exams like constantly, but all well, I am going to do pilates later and I am going to the Y tomorrow at 5:30 in the morning because I am not going to sleep tonight. I know it's really bad for you, but I have to study! ahh...i hate exams, but tomorrows the last day...thank God! Oh yea those lunges...killed me can barely walk today and don't even ask about walking up the dang stairs...lol!

ah! I feel like my life is consumed with this weight loss, yet I am not losing any weight it seems like lately. I can't take it! I am just freaking out right now and I will get out of it, but it still annoys the heck out of me! I keep half @$$ing everything about the diet and sometimes the exercise and I really need to do things right, but it is just so easy to slack off right now, I just need to buckle down! Gosh...why is it so difficult!? I need to lose weight still. I know I do, but sometimes I convince myself that I am satisfied with myself now, but I CANT be, I need to lose more weight still and it sucks. I wonder if my life will ever be without constant calorie counting and guilt that I ate too much or didn't get to the gym or something. I just want it all to stop, I am seriously going insane with it all and that is all I think about. I am always picturing the "skinny" me and it is just depressing. I make goals and rules yet I break them or don't make them, I make a decent attempt for maybe the first day, but after that I get too busy and make stupid food decisions. I seriously though don't understand why I am not losing weight, maybe it's stupid things like pop or that late night snack, but it is sooo hard to not do that. But I am just going to put eveything into it for right now and not give into temptations. I'm just tired of all this concentration on weight and diet and exercise, I just want a break, but I can't just take a break, I just have to stick with it until the end, which is only about 17-20 pounds away, depending on the day. I am going to try and constantly drink water, like have water with me always. I am not going to try and do everything at once, but incorporate new ideas and decisions a little as time. So tomorrow water and pilates.

Goals for next week:
WEIGHT TRAINING including lunges Sat, Mon, Wed, Fri
Intense Cardio (at least 60 minutes) Sun, Tues, Thurs
Light Cardio Fri (20-3