Well, decided I was ready to start another journal. Last one wasn't full but I started it the same day DT had the problems and so the first few pages were goofy and I haven't done real well anyway, so decided to start a new journal and give myself a kick in the buns to get going again.

Weight was down to 268, but it has creeped back up to 275 :c( I was so close to my 10% goal and now am even farther away from it!! I've been eating like it's a free for all and haven't been doing any real exercise.

On the good side I have done a bit of bike riding w/ my son. And even rode my bike to work this am and home again for lunch. Didn't ride it back this afternoon, used the excuse that I have a doctor's appointment this afternoon so don't have the energy to go to work, the doctor's appointment and back and then home after all that :sweat: Shoot just riding to work (5 minute ride) leaves me huffing and puffing for quite a while. I hope to slowly build up so it's not such a big deal.

I am having a HORRIBLE time pulling my butt out of bed to exercise in the am and that is when I really and truly like to exercise. By the end of the day I am too tired to do it.

But I am going to start getting up!!! And to start eating better!! I can do this and I will. ONE DAY AT A TIME; ONE TEMPTATION AT A TIME; ONE EXERCISE SESSION AT A TIME

I AM WORTH THE EFFORT TO MAKE MYSELF HEALTHIER AND HAPPIER!!!!!

Well didn't stick w/ my thought to post everyday as I've already missed one. Was very busy yesterday. Woke up late then D had an appointment in town at 5:30 so booked it from work there and then spent the evening shopping. Wanted to get everything done while I was there. Shoot gas is 3.19 this morning!! :( Outrageous!!! Somebody is making major bucks off of this deal. Hopefully nothing will come up that will require me to head to town.

Managed to buy NO junk food grocery shopping. Did buy some fruit and some better snacks and such. So am proud of myself. Also bought some veggies and salad mix.

Ohhh C is here to see me. Gotta go c the honey! lol

Hey Mikey, thought I'd drop in and say "hey", and offer my congrats on your decision to get back on plan with the eating and exercise. And good on ya for keeping junk food out of your grocery cart. That's a :super: start! Like you said... one day at a time. :)

Have a fabulous weekend!

Well bad news first. Eating this weekend was HORRIBLE!! Enough to make a normal person sick. Ate junk all weekend, shoot all day yesterday spent eating.

But good news is that I am doing better today. Got up and did 30 minutes, 2 miles watp, had frosted flakes w/ banana for breakfast :) So am feeling much better.

Stepped on the scale this am too and have gained almost 10lbs since first of July! :c( That was scary when I finally truly looked at the numbers! Was certainly a good kick in the butt to get started again.

Planned to ride my bike to work today but again talk is 40% chance of storms, and mostly severe so decided not to take the chance. Maybe will be able to get more of a workout in this noon hour or after work.

Gotta get back to work. Although don't know why as F & LP are out for their 3rd break since we started work a hour and 18 minutes ago...gosh must be tough to be a smoker and be able to break every few minutes!! X-( Must be so nice to be able to sit there and bs and know that someone else will stop their work to take care of your work

Anne, thanks for the motivation and the support!

:O I keyed all my foods in fitday and am over 1100 calories for the day. I thought I was doing really good until I saw that.

Breakfast: Frosted flakes, skim milk, banana
Snack: Banana (yep they are about to go bad so gotta eat um up!) breakfast bar
Lunch: Chili, w/ cheese, peanut butter & crackers & glass of milk

So guess I need to cut out the peanut butter, and cut down the crackers (although still want to check when I get home am shocked at how many calories fitday says they have).

Was trying to keep myself at 1200-1400 so should be in that range today. As my afternoon snack is popcorn and then not sure about dinner.

Well did alright last night. Didn't exercise this am and now my eating has gone to hatties in a handbasket. Did good this am but on lunch hour Becky wanted to see me cause she was upset w/ me so did that and that took my entire lunch hour but was so hungry that I stopped at the gas station to get some pizza and junk. So had a combo of emotional eating and letting myself get way to hungry. And I know better. Letting myself get to hungry is always my downfall because then I reach a point where I say I don't care what I eat as long as it is junk food or some of my favorite food.

Wow, you have lost a lot already....just keep plugging away...thats the key...congrats. :super:

Thanks jumpsoda. I needed the reminder to look at how far I've come instead of how far I have left to go.

I am really feeling lost w/out my group of AA's for support. Am also really suprised at that. Didn't realize how much I had come to rely on them for my support and encouragement. So need to find a support system again.

Eating is not going well at work but is okay at home. Haven't done the late night eating the last two nights at home, which is a HUGE acclomishment! Didn't do formal exercise yesterday but did more furniture and take a short walk. Better than nothing. Dont' think will get anything in today, am going to the ball game tonight. Tomorrow moving C into town so that will count as exercise! lol

Also really feeling the urge to get back into my bible. I haven't done studying in it for awhile (alot longer than it should be) and am feeling called back to get deep into the word again and focus on that instead of all this petty stuff. Am hoping to have a bible study starting up real soon. I do better w/ that then just sitting down and reading the word.

Did 55 minutes, 4 mile watp

Also stepped on the scale and finally realized that i need to change my stats and face the fact that I have gained this last few months. So I changed my stats from 268.0 to 278.8 :c( Pretty sad to have regained 10lbs. But I am on the right track now and will lose them, again, for the last time!!

No more time, gotta get ready for work.

Good news is that I keyed my foods into fitday for today, bad news is that I just finished lunch and am already over 1400 calories!! :help: Hmmm...guess thats why it is so important to log my food. Because I thought I was doing pretty good. Didn't know banana bread had so many calories and had 2 slices of it for lunch. Good thing is that I had it w/ my chili and I know that chili sticks w/ me, so can usually go all afternoon w/out a snack.

Tonight is mk meeting. However have already decided not to go to the dinner part of the meeting. I am going to be good, financially and eating wise, and eat food I have at home. Okay, maybe can get healthier stuff at the dinner (since I'll probably be eating leftover hamburger helper at home) but $ wise it is much better for me to eat at home.

anyway, tonight is a long night w/ the meeting being held in ellsworth until 8:45 and then a 45 minute to 1 hour long drive home. Uck...hate that I get home so late and then get my son to bed so late.

Good things done so far today: Exercised, been cautios of what I ate, logged my food in fitday, no pop, haven't spent any money

need to improve: calorie intake, toning or resistance workouts

I really have the munchies!! Very bad!!! However I have asked myself and am not hungry, in fact am too full. But just want to snack and munch on anything I can find. And have nothing to do at work so that doesn't help at all. typing to try and get past the munchy phase....

Hope you made it past the muchie part of your day...... I have those times too and they stink !

Beth :dn

Oh, shame on me...too long since I posted in my journal.

Beth thanks for the visit. I did make it past the munchy phase. Was really strong that day as I also was good and ate before going to the meeting and then was able to sit there and watch them eat w/out giving in and ordering!!

Tried out friends toning tables last night. Did 2 routines on them and enjoyed it. Don't feel sore today but did could feel my muscles had been worked last night. No other exercise.

Am starting to get worried in that this is my tom week and nothing has started yet!!:help: Usually start on monday or tuesday and I know it's only wednesday but geez, alot of the time I'm done by now. Am trying not to stress about it as I know that will only stall it longer. However I would feel better if I would at least start cramping. Man, that would really suck if I was...especially since my brother and sil are trying so hard to get prego, going to specialist etc. Ok, am not going to worry about it unless I haven't started by friday morning.

time to get ready for work.

Okay, spoke to soon about not being sore. My abs are tender and my arms are sore. Which is good I suspect, lol

Gonna take a few hours off work today to have my hair highlighted. Normally do it on saturdays but it's already been a month longer than it should have and Linda couldn't get me in until late October on Saturdays!!! So decided what better reason to take some vacation time then to sit in a chair and get pampered for a few hours! lol

Gotta find some time to get some exercise in today....

Eating is going so-so. Am eating things that are not the best but not binging on them and am still keying them in fitday so that is good. I am actually able to see how bad I am doing and it's letting me know what I'm eating that isn't good calorie wise.

tom visited!! yea!! Feel so much better about all my worries now. Unfortantely she came w/ cramps and all but I'll take her :laugh:

Didn't get in any exercise yesterday. Did key all my calories in fitday and think I came out to 2200 :help: horrible nubmer!!! Chris fixed hamburger helper for us but I did actually request a smaller helping that what he usually dishes up and we discussed calories, etc. so he understands where I am coming from on that and doesn't feel hurt that I wanted a lot less of his dinner. Tonight is my turn to cook and think I am doing a frozen package of a gourmet dinner meal w/ chicken and lots of veggies. Maybe not the healthiest but it is something new w/ things I don't normally eat, so is good I'm trying it.

And am going for a walk tonight too. I insist on it! Since I was a lazy bones and slept in, again :o

Will be up tomorrow to get my am exercise in!! :coach:

Hey Mikey - just checking in to say "hey" and see how you're doing! I don't normally find myself congratulating people on ToM, but in your case... :cheer: That's a good thing not to worry about anymore.

I know you were a bit shocked with the 2200 calories, but it's great that you're tracking it all and learning where the adjustments could be made. That's important knowledge to have, imo. Onwards!

Have fun at the hair salon! A day of beauty is always a good thing. :)

Mikey here is the recipe I promised you .... it serves 16

LEMON CHEESECAKE

1/2 tablespoon margarine
1/3 cup graham cracker crumbs
2 cups NONFAT cottage cheese, drained
14 ounces SOFT TOFU, drained
1 cup NONFAT YOGURT CHEESE
Grated zest of 1 Lemon (peel)
1/4 cup lemon juice
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 large egg whites
1/2 cup egg substitute
7 packets sugar substitute (I use Splenda)
2 tablespoon all purpose flour
1 cup fresh strawberries
16 strawberries for garnish

Grease the sides and bottom of a 9 inch springform pan with margarine. Dust with graham cracker crumbs. REFRIGERATE UNTIL READY TO FILL.

PREHEAT oven to 350 degrees.

IN A FOOD PROCESSOR, process cottage cheese and tofu until smooth. ADD all other ingredients EXCEPT THE STRAWBERRIES. Process until very smooth and light. POUR INTO PREPARED SPRINGFORM PAN.

Place a sheet of aluminum foil on the middle rack of the oven UNDER THE SPRINGFORM to protect the oven.

BAKE for 1 1/2 to 1 3/4 hours, until the filling is set, slightly puffed, and golden brown at the edges.

COOL ON A WIRE RACK for 45 minutes. REFRIGERATE UNTIL CHILLED FOR 2 HOURS. Remove the sides of the springform pan.

PUT THE CUP OF STRAWBERRIES in the food processor to make a puree. Spoon PUREE OVER EACH SERVING and garnish with strawberry.

Total Calories per serving: 74
Total Fat 1 gram
Saturated Fat 0 grams
Carbohydrates 7 grams
Cholesterol 3 milligrams
Sodium 153 milligrams
Dietary Fiber 0 grams
Protein 8 grams

I enjoyed chatting with you ... Have and make it a great weekend. I am as always, Monica

What a wonderful day!! The grouchy boss is gone and it is GORGEOUS outside!!! Now, if I was just in a place where we could open windows and feel the wonderfully cool air, but guess I can't have everything :laugh:

Went for a 15 minute walk w/ son, dog and bf yesterday evening and it felt so good. Was so nice and cool out and we walked a nice brisk pace.

Also had fixed a dinner complete w/ main course, veggies, salad...wow!

I don't know what the deal is but my office is busy today! They need to stop and understand that it is friday and the boss is gone! :D What makes them think I want to work.

I am in such a good mood (always happens when that boss is gone, sad how she brings down the entire office) I could bounce off the walls.

Thanks for the recipe Monica. Soons as I get the guts to try tofu I'll try it :o

Anne2, thanks so much for the visit. Having someone stop in my journal always makes me feel so much more motivated and raring to go!

No time to post but did want to report that I am down 2lbs!! YEA!!!! 276.8!! On my way back down again!! :cheer: :up:

I've gotten some walking in but not much. However I am very pleased to report that I have not done emotional eating once this week :cheer: I have managed to resist binging and my other vise the eating at night when bf has gone home and son is in bed!! And I even have 3 cartons of ice cream in the freezer and are you ready for another shocker?? We had oreos in the house, went to grab one this afternoon and they have gone stale!! :O Who would have ever guessed that oreos would go stale in my house :rofl:

Well, spoke to soon about my eating. After bf left and son was in bed had a large bowl of ice creamX-( shocking thing is that it didn't taste as good as it has before, so hopefully the craving is going away. We'll see.

Peeked at the scale today and it is still going down! So if I have a good weekend hopefully monday will be down even more.

Hi Mikey,
Congrats on the 2 lbs. lost! Next time you crave ice cream ask yourself if it's really worth it. Sometimes I crave things, get it, eat it, realize that it's not as good as I thought or imagined, finish it anyway, then regret it.

Anyhow, I really think you are doing great. Keep it up.

Wow...what a layer of dust on this journal! lol Shame on me not posting in here this long. I thought it had only been a week or so. Guess time has just been flying by.

Had surgery to remove my gallbladder the 4th and discovered that I am very sensivite to the aensthesia (can't spell that word!), long story short vommited during surgery, for several hours afterwards and felt sick until just yesterday. Am finally feeling better.

Weigh in this am was 275.5 so up .5 but I'm not going to stress about that since I have spent the last 2 weeks laying around and sleeping trying to recoup.

For the first time in ages got in some "formal" exercise. Managed 15 minutes on my bike. Not real hard, I know I can push much harder but at least its a start.

Have my boob squishing appointment today (yuck!!!) so gotta get off of here and get some work done. Hope to find time to key my foods in fitday. Am wanting to get back into that habit too.

Noteven~ thanks for the visit!! An encouraging word always helps!!

I AM DOWN A SIZE IN CLOTHES!!! WENT SHOPPING AND TRIED ON SIZE 26 JEANS AND THEY FIT!! AND 3 OF THE 4 TOPS I BOUGHT ARE SIZE 2X INSTEAD OF 3X!!!! :CHEER: YEA!!!! I AM SO PUMPED!!!!

Spent money on clothes that I shouldn't have so have told son and bf that next month may be beans and weaners all month :rofl: but I very rarely buy myself clothes and although I spent $72 I saved $49 so think I did good.

CONGRATULATIONS :cheer: WHAT A WONDERFUL ACHIEVEMENT ... :up:

Keep moving forward and NEW CLOTHES IS A WONDERFUL REWARD. Have and make it a great evening. I am as always, Monica

Monica~ thanks for the encouragement!

I was so excited about my news that I couldn't get to sleep last night :o so woke up late this am and didn't get any exercise in. But am going to try and get it in this evening. Was hoping for a walk but might have to run back to town so don't know that it will fit. Managed well at both breakfast and lunch to have single size helpings and have had water or milk all day.

Your doing it Mikey you are slowly changing your life style. Congrats in the smaller size. That's great. And down another size from now to christmas. Go girl.

Thanks Linda!! The encouragment I get from everyone at this site is why I am still working on this and haven't given up. It is such a nice boost to have someone post postive words meant for you, means so much to me!! :ghug:

Weighed in this am and was up 1+lbs...just doesn't seem right. So am not going to sweat it and we'll see what next week shows.

Managed 15 minutes on recumbent bike this am. Am thinking about riding the bike down to work this afternoon. What better way to warm on a 40 degree day :laugh: It's a short ride but leaves me huffing and puffing so guess that is good.

Off to key my foods in fitday. I always put that off and need to find a way to keep myself using that site.