Okay, so I'm mad. I'm angry, disappointed, resigned, frustrated and well here! I don't want to say I'm back. I keep coming and going and wanting to be here and getting sidetracked with life.

I've been on and off here for well over 2 years now. What can't I get a handle on?? Don't know...no easy answers. I figured that one out quite quickly!

My goal since I started this journey years ago was to not be fat at 30...hell, 30 is sneaking up on me each day! Its just over 3 months away...I'm resigned that I will be fat when I turn 30...nothing I can do about that now...what I can do now is keep myself on the right track to LIVE MY THIRTIES HEALTHIER!!!

I rejoined Weight Watchers about 3 weeks ago. I lost 10lbs in the first two weeks...then I went on vacation for a week. I go back tomorrow to see the damage and I am certain its back up to where I started. Oh well. I'm not mad about that. I need to see the number to keep going.

I decided about a week ago to come back to Diettalk and I was going to change my name....reinvent who I am on here...but I can't. I am littlebeetle. :)

I stare at the mirror everytime I walk by it now. I dont know if I am looking for reaffirmation of my obesity or if I am lookign for that tiny sign that perhaps the fat doesnt want to stay. I dont know. In my life mirrors have never meant a thing...but now...its an obsession...i stare, twist, turn, glance, sneak peaks, study myself......no real reasoning...just noticed that I am doing it alot now.

Not starting with goals and wants right now...just writting. Writting helps the soul....this is a life tiem thing...a whole being thing...my soul has to get on track of this...with my body, my butt, my mind.....

Hi Little, :wn

Welcome back home .. you know imho those of us here at Diettalk are SUCCESS STORIES IN THE MAKING .. we're here STRUGGLING but WE'RE HERE .. it doesn't matter how many times you've resumed your weight loss journey IT'S THE FACT that you're HERE ..

I was taught EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING WORTHWHILE in attaining in life TAKES TIME AND PATIENCE so needless to say WE ARE ALL WORTH THE TIME AND PATIENCE IT TAKES TO SUCCEED ..

When you go to your WW meeting don't put it in the NEGATIVE put it in the POSITIVE .. you're going to see what you can DO to lose weight .. I'm glad to see you back and along with others in our Diettalk family ARE HERE TO APPLAUD YOUR SUCCESS :cheer: and to OFFER SUPPORT :console: in your STRUGGLES .. have and make it a great day. Monica

Thanks so much Monica!

I know that Diettalk is paramount to my success...its just fitting the time into my day. I know its an excuse. I know it takes 5 minutes. Its just something I have to get back into the habit of doing!

I love DT and all the support and friendships I've made over the years :) I am really looking forward to my WW meeting tomorrow so that I can see where I stand. I know that I've gained but I want to the umph to push me forward.

I appreciate your support :)

Thanks
Shan

Hi Shan, welcome back to DT!! :hug: It's good to have you back. I think just being here is a big part of success and you're on the right track.

Vacations are so tough, don't beat yourself up about vacation weight. The good thing about it is that what comes on quickly tends to go away quickly (okay, not as fast as it comes on, but still... LOL).

:cheers: Cheers on your return!

Glad to see you "here" hun! It was my message that made you come back, wasn't it?! ADMIT IT! The memory of our friendship here on DT was self evident in my note on your wall and you couldn't resist. ;)

I hope to see you sticking around and at least making it routine to stop in to DT again. After all, I'm here so much more often then I am on FB!!

Big :hug: to you!

MD

LOL Ok MD....it was honestly your FB message that kicked me in the pants. Honestly, it was just that you remembered about Dad and Sue that made me say Hey...DT really did hook me up with some super supportive ppl who meant the world to me....get back there and get in gear!

I am pleased with myself overall. We took Anges mom to the falls for a while and poof...out went the good habits. We did a lot of walking but alot of not so great eatting too...oh well.

Hopefully it doesnt stay around too long! I'm excited for tomorrows weigh in and to just keep going....who knew that August would get here so fast???? Certainly not my ***** LOL

Thanks for the welcome back Nausicaa!!! I greatly missed DT and always feel like I "come home" when I start back here. I think this time will be different then my last several attempts to get reinvolved. Then it was just my head...this time its my head, heart and body that are recommited!!

SOOOOO glad to be back :)

Shan

Shan I was thrilled to see your post today. Not sure if it shows but I am struggling and right now my commitment to come here each day and reflect on my day just past is helping. I want this to be my norm - -to have to think about what I eat and how I move. This is the only way we can be successful.

Well my dear Canadian Friend you were missed and so pleased to see you back. Lets see what we can do. No lets just do it!!

Onward and downward

Good to see you back. WW is working for you very well so far. Good for you.

So...you are a young'n. Hmmm. I'm sending happy, pre-30, weight loss vibes your way. Make sure not to push too hard at first. You don't want to have body-rebellion on your hands. But you are doing great, and you know that. Take care.

Hi there! There's an underlying determination that shines through what you've written, and it really seems like you are on your way to figuring out how to reach whatever goal it is you're after. I'm struggling to lose 5 lbs, let alone 10, so I may not have the best practical advice, but I look forward to peeking in here to see how you're doing!

Hi Shannon,

Glad you pm'd about the challenge, and VERY glad that you joined us!!! Looking forward to cheering you on!!!

Hi, Shan:

I'm glad to see you posting again here at Diettalk. We are all struggling in one way or another, so we do know and understand your struggles. Losing the weight is not all that easy, but it can be done. Just take it a day at a time, and keep posting here at DT.

It's worth the effort, it really is.

Hello! I feel just like u do. About 7 yrs ago i went on ww and lost 48 pounds in 6 months but quit and gained. I went back on it last january after seeing photos i didnt like at all, i mean it didnt even look like me but it was me. I was doing well and around 3 months into it i switched to calorie counting. Within 7 months i lost 45 pounds. then life happened to get in the way with much stress and i quit and regained. I am now on ww again and trying. it is so hard to get back into the groove. each yr i swear this is it and im tired of losing and regaining then losing weight again i already had lost. i think the problems with over eating stem from inside ourselves. its like self medication. anyways glad to see you back and wish u well on your journey.

I almost forgot today...almost, to come here! I was working away...doing my thing...checking my other email etc and then Diettalk popped into my head! I quickly quit out everything else and headed over!

I floated through others ppls journals for a bit, updated in some challenges and cruised the list until I found this post! The smile that spread across my face just made me beam! Honestly, almost a tear...

I remember, so quickly, so vividly WHY DT works, why I loved it, why I missed it and thought about it often, why I NEED it....You are all so terrific...individually and collectively...I appreciate the support and will give all my effort to give back to each of you what you give to me...

Jay ~ Its so happy to be back and catch up! I'm glad that you're still pushing through...you're onward and downward has passed through my mind often. I know that coming here each day and reading others stories make mine seem so much more "ok". I need to make what I am going through ok and understand that I am one OF a million....not one in a million...the feeling of not being alone is wonderful!

Fagan ~ yes, yes, I guess you could still call me a youngin!! August 25th will be my 30th birthday and while I have sat on that day, that milestone as THE day I will be thin *LOL* I realize now that its just another day. I will make the change though....its different this time...I'll be smart and STAY here for teh support and encouragement... I remember from previous attempts that going gung-ho into this backfires...I'm okay with starting small and being happy with the little steps....thanks hun :)

Purple ~ Thank you so much for popping in! Your's is a new face! I appreciate all the advice, support, encouragement and friendship I can get. I've been on and off here for a long time now. I've been tossing the same FLIPPIN' 40 lbs around for a long time now. I fgure I'd be happy to lose 50lbs and be 220...that would be happy for me....but my ultimate one day, maybe, goal will be 180....I can get the weight off...its just sticking with it, following through and pushing past the humps that cause problems for me. We'll support each other???!!?? How does that sound?

Crazy & Jo ~ So glad to be back! I dont ever really know why I leave...laziness, life, fear??? Don't know. I'm back and will do my best to check in several times a week. Can't say daily just yet but we gotta start somewhere right??? Appreciate your kind words....

Angel ~ You are so very right about weight gain and loss being emotional. Our stories sound extremely similar. I KNOW ww works...i just have to stick through it. I have to be accountable EACH and every week infront of the group and the leaders....i tried it alone...it doesnt work for me. Let's make this journey together :)


Thanks again everyone!!
xoxo
Shan

Sooooo I was hoping to get to WW today to check in on my actual weight...but its going to have to be pushed to tomorrow. I have a hectic day in the office and tonight my children have their annual art show at school. My own two children are not too concerned about it but my foster son is dying for me to see what he's accomplished! We've gotten a sitter for the baby and our oldest foster daughter will stay home with them so all the attention will go to my budding artists LOL

I'll go tomorrow morning and see where I stand.

I've set some goals that I really want to achieve....really small, simple ones so lets see how I do...

Drink two jugs of water each day
Take my multivitamin each day
TRACK everything I eat each day!!!!
Walk atleast 2 times a week...

Not too bad...we'll see what happens!

It's so exciting to see people come back after leaving for a while! Welcome Home Shan!

Thanks for the message in my journal! I appreciate it! I also saw you in the weight watcher's thread! I hope that you can get back into the weigh in schedule. I don't have kids or a family to get home to/take care of, so it's much easier for me. I just know that Tuesday I am going to stay at work an extra hour, then go weigh in, then walk next door for subway dinner, then back for the meeting. It's my time. Hope that you can make it part of your routine again!

If you wait until Tuesday, the vacation weight will be gone:)
Keep it up, and stick around for a long time!

Thanks Mel!
I think you're right. I think I may wait until Tuesday to weigh in because I Dont think the rules allow me to do an official one now and again Tuesday. I really like that schedule and it keeps me accountable over the weekends...

I have a very busy life....work fulltime, married, 2 of my own kids and three foster children, married, 3 puppies and well just other normal life stresses... I have realized though that I MUST do this for me...its not an option anymore

Thanks!
Shan

Just a quick note before dinner!! Happy to say that I came home for lunch and went for a walk with Ange. We walked for about 25 minutes. I came home and drank 32oz of water so far (my bottle is 32oz and I want to drink 2 a day).

I feel good and am happy with todays choices. I've written every bite that went into my mouth so far and have a yummy dinner planned. I am eatting a porkchop, green beans and boiled baby potatoe.

More later
Shan

Sounding good Shan -- making good choices is half the battle!! Cheers friend glad to see you back.

Deep Breath....

Anyone else as happy as I am to see Friday come???? My Canadian friends and I are all gearing up for a three day weekend! Long awaited for many I am sure.

I found last night that I really have to have my mind completely wrapped up in my lifestyle changes. Food, exercise, water, goals have to be in my every thought, my every move. Its not obsessive but rather realistic for me I think.

Its like having this constant inner conversation with myself. A little wierd but extremely effective!

I ate well last night and only snacked on a 90 calorie pack of Special K Crispy Bites while watching Ugly Betty...lol I am amazed at how yummy they are. I find all those normal 100 calorie packs of say Sunchips or cheesies just make me want more. This pack was satisfying, filling and i was good with just one.

I accomplished all my goals yesterday expect one. I didnt write down ALL my food. I dont really have a reason why...just didnt. Most of it, but not all. I'll start working otu the points too...

I know I didnt eat the best yesterday...nto that I ate anything bad, I just dont think I ate enough. I didnt plan for my day so the morning/lunch part really sucked.

I had

3 Breton Crackers
1 Nutrigrain Bar
2 homemade tea bisquit w/ soya margerine (1/2 teaspoon)
4 tiny new potatoes boiled
1 porkchop with mushroom and spices
1 tea bisquit no butter
2 tbsp of apple sauce
1 90 cal pack of crispy bites
roughly 70 oz of water
1 bottle of coke zero.

So overall nothing to be happy about not nothing to cry about either.

Any advice on how much water I should be drinking each day??? I can get the two big bottles down (roughly 35oz each) and I dont know how much more i could get.

I did take my vitamin and walked yesterday around lunch.

Today is off to a good start too....got to be positive to see positive results right??? Its a gloomy day here though....sure wish the sun was shining :)

Shan

Good Morning,

Now that summer is almost here I will start making popsicles using Crystal Light (mixed with water) .. they have so many flavors -- i.e. SUNRISE, FRUIT PUNCH, PINK LEMONADE .. imho by freezing them you get additional water intake and a very tasty treat .. you can have as many as you want and not exceed your caloric intake ..

Also I don't know if you have ever tried FIBER ONE CHOCOLATE GRANOLA BARS .. they're very tasty and very filling .. it's like eating a chewy brownie (or at least I think it's like that) .. CURVES also has a CHOCOLATE PEANUT GRANOLA BAR ..

Just remember that you're on a weight loss journey .. it's going to take time and patience to achieve the goals you have set for yourself .. if you fall down IT'S OKAY .. YOU'RE HUMAN so DON'T BERATE :whip: YOURSELF .. just go back and start again .. I've been on this journey for a long time .. and I'M STILL LEARNING .. we never HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS and as long as WE LEARN we're GOING TO SUCCEED .. have and make it a great day. Monica

Thanks Monica for your input and the ideas for yummy snacks...snacking and me kinda go hand in hand LOL

I have a really hard time getting on here during weekends. With a housefull of kids its crazy and computer "down" time is very limited!!

I was hoping to go to WW's again today but money is tight. Ange returns to the boats and its slow going...soooo i will go it alone until things get a bit better :)

I've been doing ok....again, it being a long weekend I wasnt super awesome. I need to find a way to work my water into my home routine not just into my work routine.

I've gotten some walking in and over all I have to say I am pleased.

So, tomorrow I'll weigh in at home in the morning and see where I stand. I'll track my weight weekly at home until I can go back to WW!

Chow for now,
Shannon

Hi Shannon, :wn

I looked up your points in my OLD WEIGHT WATCHER'S starting book and it says you're supposed to have the following points at the following WEIGHTS:
275 to 299 Pounds = 31 Points
250 to 274 Pounds = 30 Points
225 to 249 Pounds = 28 Points
200 to 224 Pounds = 26 Points
175 to 199 Pounds = 24 Points
150 to 174 Pounds = 22 Points
LESS THAN 150 Pounds = 20 Points

Don't forget you also have 35 EXTRA POINTS EACH WEEK .. I hope this helps you .. have and make it a great day Monica

Hi Shannon,

Just peaking in to see how you are doing. Hope you had a great weekend. Looks like you are doing just great!!!

So, ya, this journey sucks LOL

It feels like each and every day is a new day! I am not liking this road at all. I feel stressed and tense ALL THE TIME! Like I'm waiting to fail or waiting for the shoe to drop. And if I do make a mistake, if I do eat something I Shouldnt have or not drink my water or forget my vitamins...or something...i feel horrid!

*sigh*

I think I'm pmsing LOL Cause I am usually not so emotional...

I feel the need to be at Weight Watchers and hate the feeling that by not being there I am not succeeding...I mean, its only a room with a digital scale...I DONT NEED that to succeed!!

growl...having a bad day...sorry everyone!

Ok...so I got up and went and weighed myself. I feel better after writting and sending that!

The total on the scale I have is 263.5
I remember from my WW days before and the two totals are way different but atleast I have a number to go from!!

So ya, thats where I am today...263.5

Shan

Good Morning Shannon,

WAY TO GO .. you're losing AND THAT'S WHAT COUNTS .. YOU CAN AND WILL ACHIEVE WHATEVER GOALS YOU SET FOR YOURSELF .. just KNOW THAT THIS JOURNEY TAKES TIME AND PATIENCE AND YOU ARE WELL WORTH THE TIME AND PATIENCE IT TAKES ..

Have and make it a great day .. Monica

Hi there!
I am short on time, but just wanted to say hi! Don't give up:)
All my weights here are what I weigh at home, since my ww weight is usually about 4-5 pounds more since I go to evening meetings.

Make today a great day!

It feels like each and every day is a new day!Each and every day IS a new day -- a NEW chance to do well, to stay on the plan, to make TODAY count in terms of healthy eating and activity -- thank goodness it's a NEW DAY because otherwise we'd be beating ourselves up over yesterday's mistakes! And since tomorrow is also a new day, don't worry about tomorrow yet. Worry about tomorrow tomorrow. Focus on TODAY, one day, one set of circumstances, one series of meals, one daylight's worth of chances to be active, one night's worth of good sleep, and make today a GOOD DAY.

And congrats on having a much lower weight this week. What a great motivator!!!

Thank you so much ladies! You guys make it all worth it, honestly!!

If i remember correctly my WW weights were always 4-8lbs different then what I have here. I weighed in in the evening though not after dinner.

I feel good and feel refreshed today. I really need to find time ot get on DT during the weekends too. Its amazing how this place makes me feel :)

I reentered my old fitday acct today. I want to track my food but am horrible doing it by hand...so lets see if this works :)

Hope you are all well!
Shan

Actually, the old WW's plan is different from the new one. On the old plan, you got the range that Monica gave you. And that was it - no extra flex points. Now you have a specific number of points for the day PLUS the 35 flex points for the week. Does that make sense? If not, say so and I'll try to explain it further, lol.

Glad you're feeling better about this - you can do it!

Thanks Mel!

I am enrolled in WW right now just not able to go so I know how the points work. I actually hate losing the little buggers LOL I appreciate your offer though.

I am doing ok. Feeling motivated and making good choices. Turned down icecream yesterday...cRAZY!!!!!!!! :) YA!

Busy busy at work today so I'll check in again later

SHan

Is it later yet??? Come out and play!!!