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Thread: 2012-goal year-finally??????

  1. #121
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    Thanks for the good thoughts everyone. Louise I'll ask my sister if she knows about the disability credit.
    Lisrey, Peng and I were talking about how neat it would be to venture south and meet some of our DT friends. But maybe some of you could venture noth the visit Alaska and drop in on the way.

  2. #122
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    Hi Pat

    WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I read back about 3 pages and all I kept thinking was WOW!!!!

    I would say you have a very full plate right now - to say the least!

    Your DH - I am so so so super thrilled that it is something that has a good prognoses - I too while doing research about my DH found that this is a very painful surgery. Please don't mind me "telling" you this as I know that you, your daughter & hubby are all smart people, but please please be sure to talk to the surgeon before the surgery and ask what he plans to do for pain control afterwards. Maybe consider keeping a notebook to write down all your questions and the drs answers, tests results etc. I know when there is a lot going on I tend to forget stuff that one would think too serious to forget.

    But maybe that is just me

    Your Mom - wow! What a stressful situation especially with all going on with your DH. It is good that she does have family close by, good for her as well as good for you. Do you have netflicks in Canada? It's a movie rental type thing that brings you movies in the mail. I am asking as my daughter gave me a movie from there to watch about dementia. Not the medical end, the personal side of it. If your interested I can give you the info.

    Oh before I forget in your spare time (ha ha ) did you gt to talk to your boss about less hrs next year?

    well it is after midnight and I am sitting on my pumpkin and my mice are eating it, so I need to scat

  3. #123
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    My journal is slipping down to next page. So better rescue it.

    Thanks for dropping by Beth. I'll answer your questions first.

    I did talk to my boss' boss about what is the best plan for next year. I could retire which was my originial plan. But I went to our union office and had them look at my pension situation ( a service they do for everyone) and the advisor said I would be smart to do another year.

    I would like to do about 50% next year. The big boss said she would keep that in mind and see what she could do. But she also said I am hard to replace, well not just me but me and my coworkers doing the same job. She said what she would do in my case is leave everything as it is; but if as the year goes on I decide I do want to retire I just need to give 30 days notice.

    A lot depends upon how hubby is doing and if we decide to sell our house. It also depends on how the winter is as that makes a huge difference on the commute. Last year was brutal but this year was mild, which made a huge difference.

    Actually the deadline for saying what we will do next year is Friday. Every decision is on hold for us until hubby has his surgery so for now I'll just leave everything as it is and work the job situation out later.

    Hubby has his surgery on Tuesday. He has a 4 hour pre surgery clinic on Monday which I will go to too.

    He is aware that the recovery from this type of surgery is very painful. But he has a much higher tolerance for pain than most people.

    A number of years ago he had a work accident when a staging gave way and he fell from roof level and broke several ribs. So he knows what the rib part will be like after the sugery. When he broke some ribs and also his hand at the same time he refused pain meds so I know he will be able to control how much meds he accepts this time.

    It will be a big relief to get this week over. He will be in the hospital for 5 days and I am arranging things so I can work from home for the week after he comes home.

    I called my mom this afternoon. Her medical crisis has really impacted her short term memory which has not been great for the past two years. She didbn't seem to remember much about being in the hospital except she did remember being in the ambulance. She asked me how the ambulance people knew to come. i went through how my brother and sister in law just happened to be visiting when she lost conscousness but she didn't remember anything about it.

    That may seem sad but what is great is that she is like a different person. She spent the last few years fighting with all of us about everything and refusing to allow any help at her condo.
    But as my brother said in some ways she is better because the blood is likely now circulating better to her brain. She is also getting her meds exactly as she should. She was actually quite funny when I talked to her.

    She went from the hospital to respite care at the nursing home. This is the same place where we had taken he to check out several times in he past few years and she flatly refused to go.

    So the big shock is now she loves it. She wants to stay at the highest level of care. She just loves the nursing staff and loves that all meals are provided. She has not mentioned her condo at all. It is expensive but my sister went over to the bank and checked out all her expenses and income as my sister and brother have power of attorney. Mom's pensions cover the monthy frees so she can stay at the highest level of care.

    Mom was telling me all about it and I told her my daughter and I had been there with her two years ago.
    She wanted to know why we didn't tell my sister about it so she could have arranged it sooner! She has no memory of the rages she would go into everytime the home would send her a newsletter.

    She loves that she goes to the dining room for three meals a day and can check off her food choices the day before. She also loves that everyone at the dining room is using a walker so she doesn't mind using hers. when I called her she had just come back from a religous music concert on a large screen for Easter. She said there is live music presentaions several times a week which she loves.

    When I told her we had been there she asked me what I thought of it. I said what I loved was the beautiful gardens in the summer with the nice paths where people were walking around in the nice weather. She said, "Oh my, I won't do that without a 'guide", I'd be afraid I'd just wander off!"

    Then she was telling me about her room and how they were going to let her stay in the same one because she didn't want to move to the bigger apartment type ones.

    She said they were going to take the furniture out and my brother would bring her own bed and some living room furniture from her own place. I asked her what was in the room now. She said a table and two nice arm chairs but they had already moved one out. Then she started laughing and said she must be getting old because she just realized the chair hadn't been removed, she hadn't seen it because she was sitting in it.

    So far this is quite amazing. It is wonderful to think she can spend her last years comfortable and relaxed rather than totally anxious and angry. My father would be thrilled to see the quality of life the pensions he had planned so carefully can provide for her if she continues to co-operate.
    So that's the latest from here.
    I hope everyone has a nice Easter holiday.
    Pat
    It will be a busy week with hubby in the hospital in the city.

  4. #124
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    How wonderful to hear good news about your Mother! I just got some similar good news about my Granny. Very nice feeling! I hope she continues to cooperate with all of you and enjoy her new situation.

    Good luck to your husband on the surgery. Sounds like things are moving full steam ahead, and that he wants to get it over with. I'll be thinking about both of you and sending all best wishes!

    Have a nice weekend!

    Lisrey
    I'm walking on sunshine!

  5. #125
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    Wow such good news about your Mom!!! Really Pat one big load off your back and so glad she loves it... Funny how some folks can be so difficult and turn around like that.. Happy for you and the family on that front.
    Will be thinking about dear hubby on Tuesday and the previous day the pep day... I am pretty calm when I go for surgery.. I was for my cancer and I was for my hysterectomy.. I was alone for both of them.. I can only imagine the pain hubby will be in.. mine for my colon surgery was the worst I have ever had.. They cut right up the center of tummy and close to naval so through muscles etc so I can only imagine what it will be like with ribs cut.. Not to worry about pain meds they will make sure he is comfortable for sure.. They did me and I am sure the hospitals out there are equally as good if not better.. 5 days is not bad at all I was in longer than that for mine...I went in on the 8th and came out to go to the son's on he 17th.. so 9 days for me..
    Well this is a big week for you. .I will be thinking of you and hubby... I hope to come out to see you this summer but time will tell.. Take care Pat.. Get your rest and we are thinking of you
    "Not your conditions that shape your destiny,
    its your decisions" ~~Anthony Robins~~

  6. #126
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    Wonderful news regarding your Mother. I took care of my parents, they had been divorced for years, and know how much better you feel when you know they are safe. I hope the surgery goes well.

    Carol
    Carol

  7. #127
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    Such good new about your mother, I hope she continues to realize how nice it is there. I hope everything goes well for your husband on Tuesday and the pain isn't more than he can stand. I will pray for him this Tuesday.

  8. #128
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    Good news about your mom, Pat. Hoping all goes smoothly for dh on Tuesday.


    "Maintenance of a major weight loss includes now & then dealing with the regains!" ~ Tess2

  9. #129
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    Happy Easter Pat!
    "Not your conditions that shape your destiny,
    its your decisions" ~~Anthony Robins~~

  10. #130
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    Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers today, we are just leaving for the hospital for hubby's sugery.
    Yesterday was stressful as they were going over everything that could possibly happen at the pre op session.
    It will be a relief to get today overwith but recovery will be tough for him.

    Pat

  11. #131
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    Thoughts and prayers are with dear hubby, the surgeon and your family that all goes well today.. The pre-op sessions are pretty scary but they have to tell you all the things that could go wrong as well as other things but I know dear Pat that hubby will come through this ok...
    "Not your conditions that shape your destiny,
    its your decisions" ~~Anthony Robins~~

  12. #132
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    will be sending all the good energy I can


    xoxooxoxooxoox
    I can resist everything but temptation ... Oscar Wilde


    Remember, life is a gift, a lovely gift, a good gift. And since life is good, let us enjoy it thoroughly! ~ JoThrive


    Courage is what drives individuals past the fear, past the daunting barriers, into the unseen through constructive action.

  13. #133
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    Sending positive thoughts and prayers. I have heard all the things that might happen and my feeling is TMI. Just do it and shut up.

    Carol
    Carol

  14. #134
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    My thoughts &n prayers are with you guys today!

  15. #135
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    I know they really scare you at the pre-op. Before my dh at his surgery for colon cancer they did the same. But everything went well. Praying that all goes well for your husband also.

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